Autumn Leaves
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: Fall brings many changes. Will Eli and Auden be able to handle them? Takes place after Let's Restart.
1. Chapter 1

Autumn Leaves

Chapter 1

"Mmmm, I think we need more sprinkles."

"Yeah!"

"You do?" I smiled at the two kids before obliging them, throwing in some more chocolate syrup while I was at it. "Is that enough?"

"Yes," Vinny told me, giggling. "I like your new apartment, Auden."

"It's really nice, huh?" I was going to say something else, but I had to tense up as arms were wrapped around me and cold lips were pressed against me. "Eli!"

"What?" He kissed the back of my head now before releasing me. "By the way, the toilet's fixed."

"What do you mean fixed?"

"…Never mind then. Moving along." Eli stepped to the side of me, facing the two kids in front of us. "Did Auden make you guys sundaes?"

"Yes," Thisbe said, giggling as Eli ran his finger down the side of her ice cream scoop. "Eli."

"What? I just showered," he said after licking up the ice cream from his finger. "Mmmm, Aud. You gonna make me one?"

"No," I said, leaning against the island in my kitchen.

Thisbe and Vinny were seated on the other side on two stools that Eli had brought to me, claiming they were vintage. When I asked what he meant by that, he said that he found them in his parents' attic. Regardless, it was his house warming gift to me, so I kept it.

My little half-sister and her friend had both brought me their own gifts too. She gave me a really nice blender, though I was completely certain it was really from Heidi, who was not only on a new liquid diet after her recent breakup with Jack, but also slightly put out that I wasn't letting her furnish my new apartment for me. Still, Thisbe had been very enduring when she told me we could make milkshakes with it, whenever she spent the night. They had even brought ice cream and toppings, though I opted out of that and made them sundaes instead.

Vinny, for his part, gave me a plunger. Yeah. I'm not even going to delve into why he decided that was the best item to give me. When I thought about it though, it was actually kind of a good thing he bought one, i.e. whatever Eli did to my toilet earlier. He even went as far as to tell me that he bought it with his own money. When I asked Eli if that he was true, he told me that it was, technically. Vinny had gotten a job down at one of the shacks on the boardwalk, where he would dress up in a little outfit and attract customers. Child labor? Hmmm…

"And why not?" He didn't fret though, instead just grabbing a bowl and getting to work on his own bowl of ice cream. "You not gonna have one, Aud?"

"No."

"Why?"

"I'm just not hungry, Eli."

"Vinny, Thisbe, and I came all the way down here to see you and you're not even gonna eat with us?" He shook his head at the two kids. "I can't believe her."

I just stared at Thisbe. "So when are you gonna tell me about Kyle?"

"Ew." Vinny jumped off his stool and went into the living room where their sleeping bags were already set up. Eli laughed a little bit before finishing with his preparations and following.

"Do not get my floor dirty," I called after them before looking at my sister. "So?"

"I don't know." She stared down at her ice cream.

"Your mom says that he comes over to play now more than Vinny."

"That's because Vinny works," she told me, changing the subject. "He's a taco."

"Huh?"

"He dresses up as a taco and gets people to come buy them." She looked over her shoulder at Eli's nephew. "No one else at school as a job. Other than the teachers. And the janitor."

I blinked. "Well, that is true."

"Uh-huh." She laughed before jumping off her stool and heading in there to go sit with her friends. Sighing, I watched the three of them in there for a moment before going around the kitchen and cleaning up. Once I was finished, I went into the living room and sat down on the floor next to Eli.

"When you gonna get a couch, babe?"

"Don't call me that," I said as I leaned against him. "And I don't know. The one at my old apartment was Maggie's."

"I'm sure you'll miss staying with Maggie and everything, but I like you having your own place." Eli looked around. "And this apartment is way nicer than mine."

"Duh."

"How is that a duh statement?"

I just shrugged as he held up a spoonful of ice cream. "I'm not hung-"

"Just eat, Aud." He smiled at me. "Come on."

I did so just to please him, although it also caused my sister to giggle, watching us. Vinny, for his part, was unimpressed, instead just looking around.

"When are you gonna get a TV?"

"I don't know, Vinny," I sighed as Eli kissed the side of my head. "Would you cut it out, Eli?"

"I just missed you. I haven't seen you in two weeks."

This was true enough. The only reason he got to see me today was because Thisbe and Vinny had a long weekend from school and, with a Monday off, they begged and begged Eli to come see my new apartment. Really, it was just because it had a pool, which excited them for some reason. I mean, they live in a beach town. What's so great about a pool?

"I know. I've been very busy."

"I'm sure."

Thisbe sighed, continuing to eat her ice cream. "I'm not tired, Auden. Can we stay up all night?"

"Yeah," Vinny agreed. "All night."

"Sure," I told them, as I knew the two children well enough to know that they would never make it. They never did. They would ask religiously though until I agreed before promptly falling asleep around nine or ten. Ah, the joys of children.

"I love you, Auden," Thisbe said, giggling.

"I loved that plunger. When are you gonna use it? Can I watch?"

"Should have asked earlier, buddy," his uncle told him. "I did it without you."

"What?" He sat his bowl of ice cream down before rushing into the bathroom. "Wow! It's even wet."

"What is?" I stood too. "My floor? Eli-"

"The plunger, Auden." Vinny came running back out of the bathroom, carrying it. "L-"

"Put that back. Now."

He glared at me before going to do so. "You're 'bout as much fun as Grandma. Which is not at all, Auden."

"Thanks," I told him, shaking my head. "And Eli, use air freshener next time. God."

"She's such a whiner," Eli whispered to my sister just loud enough for me to hear. Thisbe nodded, reaching over to steal a few spoonfuls of Vinny's ice cream.

"That's mine, Thisbe!" He came running at her the second he saw what she was doing, which wasn't hard in my bare apartment. "Stop it!"

Groaning, I went to sit back down next to Eli. "Why did you bring them?"

He just kissed the side of my head again. "Don't play. You know you're happy."

Leaning into him, I allowed him to feed me some more before looking at my little sister. "Thank you for the blender, Thisbe. Maybe for breakfast in the morning, Eli can make us smoothes."

"The heck Eli can." When I elbowed him, he said, "What? How am I supposed to know how to do that? Huh? 'cause I don't."

"Can't be that hard."

"That's what you'd think about algebra, but that kicked my butt in school."

"That's because you're stupid."

Thisbe gasped. "Auden, say sorry."

"Yeah. Stupid's a bad word," Vinny agreed, now finished with his ice cream. "As punishment, you should get me more."

"No more," I told them, standing now to take their empty bowls. "Are you done, Eli?"

"No," he said with his mouthful. Rolling my eyes, I headed into the kitchen to rinse out the kids' bowls.

"What do you guys wanna do now?" I asked them.

"Tell stories," Thisbe said. "Ghost stories."

"You're afraid of ghosts because you're a baby," Vinny taunted.

"I am not. I've watched a lot of scary movies."

"I doubt it."

"Shut up, Vinny!"

Groaning, I went back over to them, quickly cuddling up to Eli. "Stop it. You guys are giving me a headache."

"You wanna go to bed, Aud?" He glanced down at me, frowning. "You sick?"

"No. I'm just tired, Eli. Moving is a lot of work."

"Don't I know it," he grumbled before looking back at the kids. "You guys be quieter, huh? Auden's grouchy."

Thisbe tried to say something, but stopped to yawn before she got her first word out. "That's 'cause Auden's sleepy."

"Yeah. We're not sleepy." Vinny crawled on his hands and knees over towards his sleeping bag. "At all."

"I know," I told them, cuddling into Eli as he ate some more of his ice cream. "I wouldn't think of you guys falling asleep yet."

"Yeah. Not our two, big kindergarteners." My boyfriend grinned as Thisbe moved over to her own sleeping bag, laying down.

"Can we hear stories now, Eli? Ghost stories?"

"Yeah," Thisbe agreed with Vinny. "Real soft though. So Auden don't get mad."

So I sat there for, oh, maybe twenty minutes, listening to Eli tell some pointless stories until the two kids passed out. Then it was just the two of us, alone, for the first time in weeks.

"What did you do to my bathroom?" I whispered to him as we headed into my bedroom, leaving the door opened behind us so we could hear the kids if need be.

"Nothing. I mean, I would suggest some more air freshener, but nothing really bad." He patted his stomach before getting onto my bed. "At least I'm on empty now, huh?"

Still I just sighed as cuddled up next to him. "My headache hasn't gone away."

"Maybe you have a cold."

"I hope not," I groaned. "Besides, I think that it may just be allergies."

"Maybe it's from not sleeping enough."

"You and your maybes."

"Should I really be sleeping this close to you? Huh? Maybe you're contagious or something."

I nodded at the open bedroom door. "You'd rather be out there?"

"Absolutely not." Kicking down the covers, he quickly pulled them back up around us. "How could I leave you in here all alone?"

"The kids are all alone."

"What? Nah. They have each other."

"They're both kids. They're alone."

"Kids? Aud, Vinny has a freaking job. He's a man now."

Resting my head against his chest, I asked, "How much money does he make?"

"Not much. It's really just to give him something to do during the day. You know, after school."

"Mmmm."

Vinny had been allowed to stay in Colby for school only on the condition that every extended break would be spent with his mother. Really, in my opinion, Kelly just didn't want him back. And I could understand that. Vinny was a lot of drama to do on your own. Not that I could understand the whole 'give your son to his grandparents' thing. At all. Steven's still there though, so I guess its okay. I guess…

We were silent for awhile after there. I was trying very hard to fall asleep, but found it impossible. My head hurt and I didn't feel like doing anything, but I wasn't tired. At all. Around eleven, Eli got up to go to the bathroom again, telling me he was probably gonna 'tear it up' so I should hope for the best.

Right.

Glad I fell asleep before he got back.

* * *

It was another week before I saw Eli again. This time, though, it was because I was going to see him. You know, to spend my normal allotted time in the town that I somewhat liked, somewhat resented.

"God your jeans are tight."

"Then take them off, stupid."

So, in the town I somewhat liked, somewhat resented, I did the thing I felt the same way about.

Have sex with Eli. Again. Since that's what we do best. Other than, like, fighting or whatever. We do that pretty well too.

Anyways, Eli was done with trying to fit his hand between my jeans, which was honestly impossible, and took to unbuckling them instead. Groaning, I shifted on the bed, trying to get comfortable or at least against the pillows. I had just gotten here and been ambushed by a horny Eli. Which is nice. Not.

After all that was done, and when I say all I mean very little, Eli told me that he had been in a very intense game or something on his videogame console before I showed up and wanted to get back to it. So I just laid there, not believing that I was letting him get away with that.

As I was sitting there contemplating that, my cell rang. Groaning, I pushed myself up just enough to spot my jeans on the floor before falling back down. I couldn't reach them without getting off the bed, which obviously meant it wasn't worth it.

"Aud!" Eli called out to me a few minutes later. "Hey, Heidi said she called and you didn't pick up so she called me. Wanted to know if you were busy. Told her no. You're meeting her for dinner in twenty."

"Eli," I groaned though it came out as a whine. "Why did you do that?"

"What were you going to do? Lay around in bed all day?"

"Coming from the guy playing videogames?"

"Hey, this is my Saturday morning ritual. Don't mock it."

Pushing myself up, I pulled on a pair of his shorts and my red bra before heading into the living room.

"Since when is that your tradition?"

Glancing up from where he was on the floor, sitting in front of the coffee table, Eli shrugged. "Today."

Sighing, I went to go take my place in his lap. "Considering its Friday night, I think you can wait for tomorrow for that."

"Mmm. Not used to your schedule this year."

I kissed the side of his head. "My last year."

"My baby, a college graduate." He was zoned in his game again, controller in hand, but at least we were having a coherent conversation. "And before me. The man."

"The older man."

He laughed slightly. "It's weird, ain't it?"

"What?"

"I used to have to buy your beer, get you in to movies when you forgot your ID."

"You never had to get me into movies."

"I remember one."

"Eli."

"Maybe that was Belissa…"

He got an elbow for that.

"The point is, Aud, that I love you," he smiled and even though he was still shooting zombies on the screen, I knew it was for me. "Even when you find out that graduating means nothing and you have to get a job down here for minimum wage so that we can barely scrape by."

"Hmmm."

"Yeah."

"At least I've got a good chance of landing a job at Clementine's."

"There's that."

We were just sitting there, him shirtless and in jeans, me in my bra and his shorts, staring at the television when the door suddenly opened. And maybe it wouldn't have been so bad, had Eli not dropped the controller at that point and began to work on getting my bra off. Or, well, he wasn't working on it at that point as much as he had it off and was, well, you get the picture. Anyways, we were there, on the floor, both topless, when the front door opened.

"Hey, Eli, can you call Brooke and tell her that she's not the boss of me, I'm the boss of- Whoa."

"God!" I rushed to pick my bra up off the floor, flinging it over my exposed chest. Eli frowned at his brother.

"Try knocking, dipshit."

"Me? Try not motorboating your girlfriend in the living room."

"I was not motorb-"

"Get out," I yelled, frowning over at him. "God, Jake!"

"Seen it before, Auden. Wasn't impressed the first time. You're kind of small." Jake headed on through the living room and into the kitchen. "I need a beer. You won't believe Brooke today."

With him gone, I rushed out of the room and into the bedroom. When I emerged, Jake was on the couch, beer in hand, recounting his tales of the day.

"Meh," he said as I came into the room. "I liked her better with the shirt off."

"Jake, I will rip your stupid balls off," Eli threatened though he was now back playing his game.

"I've seen it before, Eli. Before you."

"That's it!"

"Stop," I sighed as Eli jumped up, though he was still facing the television and still playing his game. "God."

"This is quite the predicament, my dear brother," Jake said, taking another sip of his beer.

"Me?" I asked, frowning.

"What? No. That's been solved. I did you, didn't like it, and have moved on."

"I mean it, Jake," Eli interrupted. "Say it again and I will harm you."

"Harm me? How?"

"It involves the removal of your corneas."

"I don't even know what those are."

Sighing, I went to sit next to Jake on the couch as Eli sat back down on floor. "What's your problem, Jake?"

"Brooke thinks that she's the boss of me because Eli made Wallace vice manager."

"…I'm not following."

"Well, none of us have had titles before, other than Eli and Clyde. So, since Brooke is sleeping with Drake and Drake and Wallace are living together now, Drake had Wallace tell Brooke that she's the co-vice manager."

I blinked. "Is Drake the one with the buzz cut or-"

"That's not important, Auden!" Jake looked at me, eyes wild. "Do you know what this means?"

"…That Brooke is sleeping with some guy and is now co-vice manager?"

"No. It's bigger than that. It means that you have to sleep your way to the top in this company and you know who's on top?"

"Clyde."

"Right. And you know who's under that?"

"Uh-"

"Eli. So I'm going to have to have sex with my own brother. Gay incest."

"Eli, he's being weird again."

"Jake."

He took another swig of beer. "Now, Auden, since you are now in on this, I was thinking that if we just did a tag team sort of-"

"Out," Eli said, finally pausing his game and standing. "Right now."

"I'm going, I'm going." Taking his beer with him, Jake headed to the door. "In all honesty though, Eli, can you tell Brooke to stop bossing me around?"

"Will you stop making weird sexual passes at Auden?"

"…So no?"

With the door shut firmly behind Jake, Eli went back to his game without a second thought.

"You better get going, Auden," he told me, engrossed once more.

"Get going?"

"To dinner. With Heidi. Soon, I would think."

I groaned. "Don't you want to play with my breasts some more?"

"Jake's right. They are small."

"Eli."

"I'm kidding." He glanced back at me quickly. "Your boobs are way bigger than, like, a teenagers."

"I'm seriously not feeling good today and you know that."

"I did not." He went back to his games. "What's up?"

"I just…I don't know."

"Well, when you do know, text me. Or something." Pausing his game, he reached into his pocket before tossing me his wallet.

"What?" I asked, missing it and having to bend over to get it.

"Take a twenty."

"Eli-"

"Then it's like I'm taking you to dinner, but I don't have to. And pick me up something on the way back, huh? Meet her at the shop."

I groaned.

"You need a ride? Out of gas?"

"No," I sighed, heading to the door. "I'm going to walk. I need the exercise."

He glanced over at me. "Is that it? It's not that you don't feel well. You think you're fat again? Is that it?"

"I-"

"Then just go, Auden. I'm tired of listening to you bitch about losing weight. You wanna lose weight? Eat better. Don't complain to me about it."

"You're an ass," I told him, throwing his wallet back at him and heading to the door.

"Don't play. I saw you take that twenty. Throwing the wallet at me like you're mad. You sure still took my cash, huh?"

Shutting the door behind me, I headed out to Heidi's. As it was now September, the tourists were mostly gone and the streets were mostly empty. Not to mention the weather was nice as the summer was fading and autumn was beginning.

"I was about to come looking for you."

I just smiled at Heidi as I closed the door behind me. "Sorry. Jake came by and I had to help Eli deal with that."

"Jake is a he, Auden," Thisbe told me as she came out from behind the counter. "Not a that. You're a she. I'm a she. Mommy is a she. Jake is a he."

"Is that what you've learned in school?" I smiled down at her as she came to hug me. "Where's Vinny?"

"He's working. He works a lot." Leaning against me even after the hug, my younger half-sister giggled. "Work's for boring people."

"It is," I agreed, running a hand down the back of her head before looking at her mother who was getting ready to cash out for the night. "You were working alone today?"

"Yes," Heidi told me, not looking up from the cash register. "How was school?"

"It was school."

"And Eli?"

"He was Eli."

Thisbe giggled, letting me go finally. "I got a sticker today at pre-school. Wanna see?"

"Ooh," I said as she held up her hand, showing me the star sticker on it. "That's very nice. What did you get it for?"

"For turning in my reading log. I read enough this week."

"That's what you get for that? A sticker?" I looked at her skeptically. "Shouldn't you get something else? Like a prize?"

She narrowed her eyes at me. "I love my sticker."

Heidi sighed as she headed into the back for something. My sister glared at me for another moment before running over to a hat rack in the store and pulling one off.

"Look, Auden," she said, placing it on her head. "Don't I look pretty?"

So that's what I got to do until Heidi was ready to go. And as fun as it may sound, watching Thisbe put on hats is not that interesting. At all.

"So are we going to Last Chance?" I asked my ex-stepmother when we finally got out of the store. "Or what?"

"It'll be super busy. Besides, we have to make a pick up first."

"Who are we picking up?" I asked as Thisbe grabbed my hand, following me down the boardwalk. "Your boyfriend?"

"No," Heidi said slowly as Thisbe swung our hands gently. "We have to go get the working man."

Vinny was waiting for us at the taco shack when we showed up, already back in his street clothes. He was sitting on the bench in front of the shack, kicking his feet back and forth while eating a burrito.

"Hi, Auden," he called as Thisbe let go of my hand, rushing to get to his food. "No, Thisbe. You can't have none."

"Yes, I can. Yes, I can."

"You think you can just waltz up to get him whenever you want, Heidi?" A man came out of the back of the shake, something in his hand. "Huh?"

She just smiled at him. "I'm ten minutes late. If that."

"Still. He was waiting, alone, scared, and hungry."

"He looks fine, you're here, and he's eating a burrito."

"That he is," the long haired man said as he went over to Thisbe. "Here, Caroline."

I frowned when I heard that. "Is that what you go by now?"

Taking the burrito from the man, she quickly got onto the bench with Vinny to start eating it. "Sometimes. Mommy said not to tell Daddy though."

"Auden," Heidi began nodding at the blonde guy in front of us. "This is Heath. He runs the taco shack."

"We've met before," he said, smiling at me. "Or, at least, you've gotten tacos here before. With your boyfriend. Man, Eli can put a few back."

Vinny cleared his throat, saving me from agreeing. "Auden, I work here."

"So I've heard," I said as Thisbe bit into her burrito, squirting some beans onto her shirt. Heidi didn't see though, so we were good for now.

"Heath," Heidi complained, still completely focused on him. "I was going to take them to dinner."

The guy just smiled toothily at her, rolling the tooth pick in his mouth around with his tongue. "Well, consider it an appetizer."

I was getting a weird vibe off them and turned instead of paying attention to it, looking out at the beach. There were a few people down there, in the sand, but not many. It would be getting cold soon. It'll be a year soon.

"I'm done!"

Vinny jumping up snapped me back to attention. I watched as he went to go throw away his trash. When he came back, he stopped in front of me, his head facing up as he stared at me.

"What?" I asked, frowning slightly.

"Next year, when I'm a kindergartner , will you be here every day? Can you stay every day?"

"I dunno, Vinny," I sighed, reaching down to ruffle his hair. He was growing his out now, which meant no spikes, but it was still nice. He shook his hair the second my hand was gone, looking just as cute as ever.

"Come on, kids," Heidi said after another minute. "Tell Heath thank you and let's get going."

Vinny saluted the stoner-esque man before adding, "Thank you, boss!"

Giggling, Thisbe hopped off the bench, burrito in hand. "Thank you, Heath."

It wasn't until we were walking away, headed back to Heidi's car that I spoke. The kids walking ahead of us, talking about the sticker Thisbe got that Vinny didn't. I could say I'm shocked he had no reading log to be turned in. I'd be lying, but I could say it.

"Who's Heath?"

Heidi hardly glanced at me. "He owns the taco shack."

"Heidi."

"What?"

"What about Jack?"

"What about him?"

I just stared at her. Still, she wouldn't look at me. "You and Heath just seem very-"

"Honestly, Auden, I hardly see him."

"Jack?"

"Heath. I see Jack all the time."

"You don't sound too thrilled."

"Oh? And you do when you're talking about Eli?"

She had a point.

"Besides, Auden, I told you that was over."

"You and Jack are hardly over."

"We broke up."

"Eli and I break up. A lot. It doesn't mean much."

"Well, Auden, I'm an adult."

I gave her a look. "You're hardly older than me."

"I'm still older than you and that's what matters."

* * *

"Mmm, what'd you bring me?"

Closing the door behind me, I stepped into the dark apartment, not shocked to find the only source of light coming from the television, which was still showing Eli's game play. Though he was still in the same spot as before, he now hand blankets and pillows set up down on the floor, propping himself up against the couch with the coffee table moved off to the side.

"We didn't go to Last Chance, if that's what you think. We went to some restaurant the next town over. Heidi said she was tired of the food around here." Snuggling under the blanket with him, I sat the takeout box down in his lap. "Just a burger and fries. It looked good though."

"Smells good."

"Mmmhmm." Looking at the screen, I found that he was now playing some racing game. "I thought that kids stayed over on Fridays?"

"Not recently."

"Poor Eli. You're so lonely."

"And you're not in that new apartment?"

I shrugged. "I do kind of miss the barrage of men Maggie had in and out of the apartment."

He gave me a soft elbow for that. "Thought you guys were still all buddy-buddy?"

"We are."

"Then what was that?"

Not saying anything, I shut my eyes with a sigh. For a minute or two we were both quiet. Then I spoke. "Hey, Eli?"

"Hmmm?"

"…Jake never saw my breasts."

"What?" He glanced down at me before back at the television.

"When we had sex, it was…fast. I never took my shirt off."

"Oh." He shifted slightly, clearly uncomfortable with this. "Okay."

"I know you don't want to talk about this. I just thought you should-"

"I really don't, but if you do, that's fine."

"I hardly even had my jeans down. His were still up, really. He just unzipped or something. It was really fast."

Eli had paused the game, but was still staring at the screen. "I hate it, you know."

"I know."

"I hate that he took that from you. I hate that he thinks it's funny to bring up. And I hate that it wasn't me."

Popping open the takeout box, I picked up a fry before holding it up to his mouth. My attempt to be cute was lost on him though as he just turned to stare at me, watching as I slowly lowered the fry back down.

"There's nothing we can do about it now, Eli."

"I know."

"You've had sex before me. With two different people."

"I know."

"A lot of times with one of them."

"I know."

"Then what-"

"He's my brother. I have to see him every day. I have to listen to him every day."

"If it was a problem you should have never gotten with me."

That made him laugh for some reason. "Like I could ever stay away from you."

"Eli-"

"If it was anyone else, and I mean anyone else, I would have walked away. I'd have never been interested to begin with." This time he was the one to pick up a fry, which he immediately fed to me. "You, Auden Penelope West, are the only person that matters to me."

"Stop it. You know I hate my middle name."

"I think it's cute."

"Okay, _Joseph_."

"Ha ha." He turned back around, resuming his game. "You're so funny."

"Doesn't it bother Steven?"

"Doesn't what bother Steven?"

"You know," I said, picking up another fry. This time when I held it up, he ate it. "That you're named after your dad and he's not. Is he?"

"Steven Bryan Stock," Eli said. "No, he's not."

"Why not?"

"Why not what?"

"Wouldn't you name your first son after you?"

He glanced at me. "When my mom got pregnant with Steven, Dad wanted to name him after him. Joseph Jr. Mom said no though, that she didn't like that. When she was pregnant with me though, he begged and begged, so she said that if I was a boy, Joseph could be my middle name. And I was. So now we're here."

"Aw." I smiled at him, but he just rolled his eyes. "Your family has such cute stories."

"What do you mean?"

"Everything. You guys know everything about each other. My family only ever talks about intellectual things or Hollis. And honestly I'm tired of hearing about Hollis and his colic."

My boyfriend made a face. "That's okay, babe. We'll make our own cute memories."

"Don't call me babe."

"Yeah, yeah."

When I got up a few seconds later to get him ketchup, Eli asked me to bring him a coke and a bottle of whiskey. I brought him a beer instead and he didn't complain. I knew he'd just drink later when I went to bed, but I just didn't feel like dealing with it yet.

"This is us, Aud."

At that point he was done eating and working on his third beer. We were about out, honestly and I was hoping he didn't try to go out and get more. He wasn't drunk yet, but he was well on his way.

"What is?" I asked, nose crinkled.

"This," he said, gesturing with his hand before grasping his controller again. Yes, I was still stuck watching him play videogames. Sigh. It was like I was dating a twelve year old. "What we're doing. This is us. The rest of our lives."

"Eli, I highly doubt we'll be sitting on this floor for the rest of our lives."

"No, Aud. Bigger picture."

"This is the biggest picture I need."

"Auden, you don't-"

"Mmmm." I was laying with my head in his lap, trying not to fall asleep. "This could be nice, I suppose. Laying on the ground forever."

"That's not what I-"

"I know, Eli," I sighed. "I'm just kidding. Calm down."

It was getting later and later as we laid there. And eventually I did fall asleep. Not that I remember it. When I woke up, I was still on the floor, but Eli was gone. I could tell from the darkness that it was still night. Before he went to bed or wherever he went, Eli had wrapped me up in a blanket and put a pillow under my head. That made me smile slightly as I pushed myself up, leaving the blanket behind.

"Eli?" I checked the kitchen, but he wasn't passed out in there. It was then that I heard a noise coming from the bedrooms and went in there to check it out.

"Oh. Karen."

When I opened the bedroom door, I found her sitting on the edge of Eli's bed next to her son, who had a straight look on his face. Eli didn't even look up at me and his mother hardly even glanced. Her eyes were red and her face was blotchy, though it was very early in the morning, probably around four or five, so that didn't mean much.

"I'm sorry," I tried, turning to walk out of the room. "I didn't-"

"My grandpa died, Auden," Eli explained, still not looking at me. "You're fine. I just didn't want to wake you."

"I'm sorry. I really should-"

"Baby, chill." He stood up then, but not before squeezing his mother's knee. "Come here. I'll be right back, Mom."

Eli led me by the hand to the extra bedroom, shutting the door softly behind us. "It wasn't really my grandpa. It was my dad's stepfather. And when he found out at, like, midnight, he got upset with my mother for not caring as much as he thought she should. They're fighting and he said some really shit things to her. She just had to get out of the house and came here."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

"Stop apologizing, Auden." He reached out, cupping my cheek in his hand. "You're family too now. You get that, right?"

"Eli-"

"You are." A kiss to the head accompanied that. "You're my chosen family. That means a lot more than the one you're stuck with."

There was an awkward beat then in which we both looked around and realized the empty room we were standing in wasn't always that way. Eli noticed the look in my eyes first and took a glance around the room himself.

"Aud, I know that you probably want to talk about…Clayton right now, but I really have to get back to my mom. She-"

"I don't need to talk," I said, swallowing a breath. "Besides, Eli, it's just a room."

"Yeah, but it's not." My head got another kiss, though this one lingered a bit too long. When he moved back, Eli added, "Come on, let's get you back to bed, huh?"

"Eli, I can-"

"You can go back to bed," he cut me off as he led me out of the room, tugging my hand gently. "Come on."

When we walked into his bedroom, Karen was still in the same spot, shaking her head slightly. Once she noticed us though, she immediately stood.

"Auden, you can go to bed. I'm sorry. I just needed to talk to Eli," she told me as she walked out of the room. "In the kitchen, Eli."

He just sighed, watching as she walked out. Then, turning back to his girlfriend, he said, "Get in bed. I'll go get you a blanket and pillow from the living room."

"Eli, is she going to be okay?" I had never seen Karen, the patriarch of the Stock family, upset before. Well, angry, yes, but never in tears.

"She'll be fine." He kissed my head before turning to walk out of the room. Sighing, I went to lay down on the bed, closing my eyes.

"Don't fall asleep yet," Eli whispered to me when he came back a few seconds later. He quickly draped the blanket across me before making me lift my head to put pillow under there. "There you go. Goodnight, Aud."

We kissed once, very briefly, before he left the room.

"Goodnight, Eli," I whispered back to the darkness.

* * *

The next time I woke up, it was light out again. I laid in bed for a few minutes, soaking up the weekend. I still had some school stuff I needed to get done while I was in Colby, but it could wait until the afternoon.

Yawning as I got out of bed, I thought about getting dressed, but figured that could wait until my shower later. So, still in the same stinky clothes as the night before, I waltzed into the living room, expecting my boyfriend. Instead I found his mother.

"Finally up?"

I just stared at Karen for a moment, watching as she wiped down the coffee table with some kind of wood cleaner.

"Yeah," I answered lamely, coming further into the room. "Where's Eli?"

"Work. It's noon, you know."

"No," I sighed. "I didn't."

For a moment all was silent as I watched Karen clean up the living room. Then something clicked.

"Why are you cleaning?" I finally asked.

"I couldn't figure out how to change the television channel from the game setting he has it on, so I figured I might as well pick up some around here." She smiled at me as she finished the table and stood up straight again. "Now that you're up, you can come to lunch with me."

"I don't-"

"You have about half an hour to get ready," she said before I could get my words out. "I just finished cleaning the bathroom, so it's nice in there. I mean honestly, Auden, why do you let him keep it so nasty?"

"It's his apartment," I said weakly before heading off to go shower.

When I returned, Karen was in the kitchen, sweeping. I told her that I could do that, but she just told me it was time to go anyways. After finishing up in there, we were off.

"Where are we going?" I asked her once we were in her car, headed out of Colby. "Mrs. Stock?"

"Just out, Auden," she assured me. "And you know by now to call me Karen."

Sighing, I settled into my seat. I really wanted to ask her about the family death, but couldn't figure out how to do so without coming off as insensitive.

"How was school?" she finally asked. "I haven't seen you in a few weeks. Has it been good?"

"It's been…normal. I've been more focused on finding a job, really."

"Mmm. How's your new apartment suiting you?"

"Nice, but paying for everything on my own isn't exactly great." I turned to look out the window, thankful that Karen preferred riding with the radio off so I didn't have to hear whatever music it was she listened to. "Eli offered to help, but I told him that's stupid. He'll hardly be there."

"How would he afford it?" his mother asked, frowning as she stared at the road.

"His lease is coming up and-"

"Oh, Auden, he can't."

"…Can't what?"

"Move down there with you. I mean, I know the two of you want-"

"God no," I said, making a face. "I'm not offering him somewhere to stay."

"Then what-"

"He wants to move into a smaller place. He said he could probably find one." I swallowed. "You know that he only moved there for Clayton. Now though…I mean, he won't even do anything with that room. She never stayed there anyways. It's a waste."

Karen was silent for a second before saying, "Eli's always been emotional, Auden. And I don't know about you, because you're always so well put together, but he has a hard time dealing with things. That's why he drinks so much now. When Abe…passed, things were just as bad. He'll perk back. He'll be fine."

We didn't speak again for a few more minutes. It was her once again, though, that had to break the silence.

"What did Eli tell you?"

"About?"

"Elijah?"

"What?"

She sighed, glancing over at me. "Joseph's stepfather. What did he tell you?"

"Nothing, really."

Gripping the steering wheel, she said, "Joseph's really broken up, Auden. He loves his dad. You met him, I think, at that party this summer?"

"I'm sure I did."

"He's not too close with his real dad. His stepfather though, Elijah? He meant a lot to him." She took a deep breath before saying, "He got hit by a car."

"That's how he-"

"Yes. I'm not sure on all the details, but Elijah hadn't been very…lucid. They think that he left the house in the middle of the night without anyone knowing and just wandered out into the street."

"That's so sad."

She nodded as she swallowed. "I didn't…I didn't like him, Auden. I don't like most of Joey's family. I never have. And they won't ever like me. I am sad though, for him. Joey has so much heart. He feels everything so deeply."

"Like Eli," I whispered.

"Just like Eli."

When we got to the restaurant, it was mostly empty as the lunch hour was slowing down. I immediately spotted the reason we had come there though.

"I wasn't sure you'd be here, considering," Karen said as Joseph stood up from the table before pulling out two of the other chairs at the table.

"I wasn't sure you would be either," he said, taking, his seat before looking at me. "I wasn't expecting two pretty women to join me, Auden. I wasn't told you were in town."

"Just for the weekend," I told him.

"Order what you like," he told me as the waitress brought another menu.

"Oh, no, I can pay for-"

"I only brought her because I was staying over at Eli's and he left for work without even considering her," Karen said as she looked over her menu. She had yet to make eye contact with her husband. "And honestly, Auden, do you really think we'd make you pay?"

I didn't get a chance to answer that as Joseph delved into a new conversation.

"Koda called."

"And is there anything new?"

His voice came out choked up the next time he spoke. "Dad's dead, Karen. What could be new?"

"Don't start with me, Joseph. Especially not here." She finally looked up at him. "If you didn't want me to ask that you should have told me what your brother said. Would that have been so hard?"

"I just lost my dad, Karen. God forbid you ever do. When you lost your mom, did I ever-"

"This isn't about me."

"No, Karen, it is. Because everything is about you."

"What are you talking about?"

"Last night I get some of the worse news of my life and then my own wife has the audacity to pick a fight-"

"Oh, I picked a fight?"

"What are you doing right now?"

She let out a hard breath before looking at the ceiling. Then, once she had calmed down, she said, "Joey, I am so sorry that you lost your dad. I am. You have no idea how hard it is for me to see you upset. You never get sad, I know, but when you do it hurts me too. I know that you respected him greatly. He did good things for your family and your mom. Does that mean that I'm suddenly going to mourn Elijah? No. But I'm mourning for you. I love you, Joey. I've always loved you."

Karen was staring at her husband now, but he wouldn't look back at her. After a minute, she got up.

"Okay then, Joseph. Okay then."

I didn't know what to say as Karen headed off to the bathroom or even if I should say something. Maybe I was supposed to follow her. Still, I couldn't because in all honesty, I wasn't seeing her view point too well.

When the waitress came back around, Joseph was staring at the table, so I just told her that Karen wanted a water and so did I. Mr. Stock already had his drink and didn't look up once.

He finally did though once the woman had gone off, staring right at me. Still he was silent though and it was getting kind of awkward.

"I'm sorry about your dad," I finally got out.

"Yeah," he sighed. "Me too."

Since he was still staring at me, I figured I should say something else.

"In the car, Karen kept talking about how much she…cares about you."

"I know she does."

"I don't…get what's going on, so I'm not sure what to say."

He just laughed slightly, his red eyes seeming out of place as a smile came back to his face. "I like that about you, Auden."

"What?"

"How awkward you are, when things get serious." He just shook his head as Karen came back, immediately taking her seat. "You might be the best relationship any of my kids have had."

Karen frowned at him. "Linda is married, Joseph."

"I meant out of the boys. Besides, I can hardly stand Kevin."

She made a noise in the back of her throat. "Better than that boyfriend she had all through high school, hmmm?"

I could tell that the two of them were skating around what they really needed to talk about and I was truly glad. I've had some awkward times with the Stock's, but this was one of the worst.

"That's true enough, I suppose."

"Maggie was nice," Karen told him, sighing. "Did you think, Joey? Too good for Jake."

"Most of his girlfriends are."

"That's my baby, you know," she told him as he reached across the table to lay a hand over one of hers.

"And you're mine."

* * *

"What'd you do today?"

I hardly looked up from my laptop as Eli came into the bedroom. "This."

"School work? Boring."

"Mmm."

"What else you do while I was working? Huh?"

"Just ate lunch with your parents."

"Really?" He pulled off his shirt before getting onto the bed with me. Once he was settled on his side, curled against me as I sat cross-legged on the bed, he spoke. "Why?"

"Your mom was over when I got up. Apparently they already had plans for lunch and both showed up."

"Today's their date day."

"Hmmm?"

"The past few weeks, every Saturday they go out on a date." Eli kissed my clothed side. "Did they make up?"

"I think so."

He let out a long sigh. "Good."

Reaching over with one hand, I rubbed his head gently. "How was your day, Elijah?"

He pushed my hand away. "What?"

"That's who you're named after, huh?"

"I guess, yeah."

"Oh, you guess?"

"My name is Eli. Not Elijah."

"You know that that's who they were naming you after."

"Yeah, I'm sure they were."

After just sitting there for a second, I added, "So your mom must not have disliked your grandpa that much."

"What do you mean?"

"She named you after him."

"No. She let my dad name, I'm sure."

"Then she must really love him, to let him name you after him and then give you his name as your middle name."

"Yeah, she must."

Again there was silence. This time, though, he filled it.

"So our first boy."

"What about him?"

"Joe Eli?"

I pushed his head. "In your dreams."

* * *

**Got busy with my new Just Listen story and put off starting this one. Got one more chapter to that one though, so I should be able to devote some time to this. **


	2. Chapter 2

Autumn Leaves

Chapter 2

"Do I look hot in your clothes?"

"You look hot in anything."

I continued staring in the mirror as I buttoned up Eli's dress shirt. It was very loose on me, as was his black undershirt he had given me, but I couldn't tell if it was cute or not. We were in the bathroom after showering, both trying to get ready to go out on a date.

"What about my hair? Is it okay?"

"What's with you recently, baby?" He pulled up his jeans before glancing over at me. "You've been really into your looks."

"I just…it's been a year almost."

"Yeah. It has," he whispered.

"Do I still look-"

"You look perfect. Just as great as you did before."

"But I-"

"Auden, chill." He wagged his eyes at me. "You still give me a boner. And make me-"

"Stop." I made a face in the mirror, making him laugh. "Besides, anyone can make you horny."

"Not anyone," he said as he came over to wrap his arms around me. "Just you. And porn, but that's different."

I closed my eyes to hide my desire to roll them. "You really get to me sometimes."

"That's 'cause I love you." My cheek got a kiss. "I don't want you impressing anybody else anyways. Just me."

"That's because you're possessive."

"Damn straight." He was still shirtless so when he moved back away from me I was able to see his tattoo.

"Would you have ever gotten one without what happened?"

Eli of course had no idea what I was talking about and just went over to where his shirt was to pull it on. "What are you talking about, babe?"

"Don't call me babe."

"What were you talking about, Auden?"

Swallowing, I said, "Your tattoo. Would you have gotten one eventually or-"

"I don't know."

"I just mean you never got one for Abe and-"

"Abe wasn't nearly as important as Clayton." He glanced over at me. "You know that, right?"

I was staring in the mirror again. "Everyone always talks about how you-"

"Everyone else needs to shut their mouths." He shook his head slightly. "You know that?"

"Eli, we're having dinner with your parents. Don't get angry before we even get there."

Two weeks had past since Joseph's father's funeral in which time Jake had met someone. Someone that didn't live in Colby, apparently, so we were going out with the boys' parents to meet her. Going to dinner with Joseph and Karen with Eli would suck enough, but you throw his doofus brother into the mix and we have a recipe for disaster.

"I'm not angry, Auden."

"Okay."

"I'm not."

Shaking my head as I ran my fingers through my hair, I asked, "You do know that we're going over to your parents' afterwards, right? For desert?"

"I'm not sure why, but yes."

"Because Jake made a cake that he wants us all to eat."

"…That sounds disgusting."

I rolled my eyes. "You know what Heidi asked when Karen called to ask her if she could watch the kids tonight?"

"What?"

"If the reason we were all going out together is because you were proposing."

"…Seriously?"

I nodded, turning to look at him then. "Your mom called me after to make sure that I knew under no circumstance could I say yes if that was what was happening because neither of us are ready for marriage."

Eli made a face. "Why would I want Jake there when I proposed? Or my parents? Wouldn't that be a more private thing?"

I shrugged. "Heidi also asked if someone else could watch the kids so she could come along."

"Where would I have even gotten a ring without anyone knowing?"

"I don't know."

"Babe, when I do ask you to marry me, it's not going to be some big thing."

"Neither is our life together if you keep calling me babe," I muttered.

"We'll just be sitting around, hanging out, and I'll ask you. I don't even know if I'll have a ring or not. It might just be something I thought of that second. It won't, though, be some sort of extravagant affair. It'll be private."

"I don't want to get married, Eli. Like ever."

"You say that, babe, but I know you just feel like you have to." He headed out of the bathroom now. "You know we're in this for the long haul."

"Are we though?"

He paused for a second in the doorway. "Are we?"

"Who else would put up with you?"

"Me? What about you?"

"I just have to have sex with him. That's all it takes to be with a guy really, right? Putting out?"

"If that were true, you'd still be with Jake."

"Ha ha."

* * *

Ten minutes. We had only met her ten minutes ago and I already hate her. Really. After five though, I had known Karen hated her. And only after one, I could tell the guys thought she was amazing, i.e. hot.

She ordered a beer. A beer. Karen clearly didn't like that, but her husband, who immediately took that as his opportunity to do the same, couldn't stop staring. This was mainly due to the fact here fake boobs were nearly spilling out of her shirt.

"So, Gracie," Karen started after glaring over at her husband. The table had fallen silent after the waitress took our drink orders and it was obvious that Karen had taken notice of her husband's interest in the younger woman. "Jake said you were in school? Where do you go?"

She was talking now about some stupid community college, but I was hardly listening. I had gotten a headache on the car ride over and her voice wasn't helping. Gracie was a classic rich girl, from the way she spoke in that high maintenance pitch to her bleach blonde hair.

"Eli," I whispered as I leaned up to his ear. "Do you still keep that bottle of aspirin out in your car?"

My boyfriend was much better at looking at other girls around me. This was probably because at this point, Joseph knew there was no real consequence to him gawking at younger women other than Karen getting angry with him. Eli, though, had yet to 'put a ring on it' so he was still in that pleasing phase.

"Are you alright?" He glanced at me, frowning. "Aud?"

"I have a killer headache right now."

"Maybe you should drink a beer too," he whispered to me as he slipped the keys into the palm of my hand. "It's in the glove box, babe."

"What's wrong, Auden?" Karen asked, cutting Jake's new girlfriend off though that was no real lost. Joseph didn't need her to talk to stare at her breasts. "Are you okay?"

"I just need to get something from the car," I told her as I stood. "I'll be right back. Order for me, Eli."

"Aye-Aye," he agreed, knowing that I would just eat a salad. That's all I had been eating recently.

Out in the car, I sent a text to Maggie informing her that this date was not going well. She was on her own date tonight with the guy she was now staying with and had promised to keep me posted. We were trying very hard to remain close even though we weren't living together, but it was proving a difficult task.

When I got back to the table, the conversation had switched over to what Gracie hoped to major in, which was English. Karen, clearly wanting to change the conversation over to something she knew would bore Joseph, immediately brought up my mother.

"Auden's mother, Victoria, is a very renowned author around here," Karen told her. This was probably the first time I had ever heard her speak in a nice light about my mother. "Dr. Victoria West. I'm sure you've heard of her."

Gracie did this weird thing with her face that I'm sure was supposed to be a sign of regret or something before telling me that she didn't know my mother. Which, really, wasn't surprising.

Dinner was all around uneventful. Karen and I both disliked Jake's girlfriend, the boys liked her. Not much of a surprise there.

"Are you still not feeling well, Auden?" Karen asked as we made it back to the truck. Jake and Gracie had gone in her car while we had picked up Eli's parents in the truck. Now we were all going to get to go back to their house for desert. Yay.

"I feel alright," I assured her as I buckled my seatbelt. "Just a little lightheaded."

"Aud was up every night last week," Eli told his mother. "Cramming for tests."

"Well, keep up your health, Auden," she warned gently which made Joseph roll his eyes.

"So anyways, let's talk about dinner," he said, glancing at Karen. "I liked my steak."

"Is that all you liked?"

He blinked. "I like my baked potatoes as well."

"Here we go," Eli mumbled to me, glancing into the back seat via the review mirror.

"You know what I liked, Joseph?"

"I-"

"I really liked how _kind_ you were to Jake's girlfriend. Remember that? Your own son's girlfriend?"

He groaned, looking out the window now. "Karen, don't start with me tonight."

"Me? Start with you? You were the one-"

"Who am I married to, Karen? So don't argue."

"Oh, is that all that matters now? Just who you go home with at night? Not what you do before that?"

"What did I do?"

"You know what you did."

"I had a nice conversation with Gracie-"

"While staring at her breasts."

"I…Karen…the kids are in the car."

"They also saw you staring."

"Jake's girlfriend is a child, Karen."

"Then you must be a ped-"

Eli turned up the stereo then, watching as I reached into the glove box to get the pills out again. "Stop, Aud. Taking more won't make it any better."

Karen huffed from the back of the car, shaking her head at her husband before addressing me again. "You could be sick, Auden. What are your other symptoms?"

"I have no other symptoms. Just a headache."

"Flu season starts soon."

"Is it?" Eli glanced back at his mother before at me. "If you're sick, you're sleeping over at Heidi's."

"Eli."

"I'm being serious."

Joseph, who was staring out the window, said, "Vinny was sick three days last week, Auden."

"Yeah, Thisbe told me that."

"And now you've caught it," Eli said, making a face over at me. "Great."

"I don't know why you're upset with me, Eli. I haven't seen Vinny since I got here. You're probably the carrier."

His mother sighed from the back of the car. "I took Vinny to the doctor, but he just had a bug. It'll be out of your system soon enough, Auden."

"If that's what you have," Joseph told me. "You probably are just overly tired."

I was kind of tired of them giving me their opinions on my illness based off the fact I _only_ had a headache, but it was better than when they were fighting.

"Hmmm," was all Karen said to that, clearly still angry at him for looking that girl's breasts. Which, honestly, isn't that big of an offense. To old people though, I guess it is… Not that their old, really. I guess. I don't really….sigh.

"I've got it," I told Eli as his phone vibrated. It was sitting on the center console. "Oh. It's just a text from Jake. He says that he and Gracie decided it best to just go back to her place. We can eat the cake if we want."

Karen mumbled something to that as she shook her head slightly. Eli just changed the station to a sports station, distracting his father and himself.

When we got to their house, Karen told us that we didn't really have to come in and eat the cake, but Eli insisted. He said the whole reason he went out on the stupid dinner date was to get the cake afterwards; they weren't going to take that from him.

"No one's home," Karen told me as we made it up to the front door. Their house was uncharacteristically dark as Joseph unlocked the door, letting us in. "Steven's at work, the boys are with Heidi for the night, and Taylor…where is Taylor, Joseph? Were we supposed to bring her something back or-"

"She went to a friend's house I think, dear," he said as he went to sit in his chair. "Hand me the remote, son."

Eli did as asked before taking my hand and leading me into the kitchen. "Where's this cake, huh?"

"Hold on, honey," Karen called out to him as she went the opposite directions. "I'll be right back."

He just grunted as she no doubted headed to her bedroom to do something. Eli flipped on the kitchen light before letting go of my hand.

"Let's see." He did a quick twirl around the kitchen before spotting the cake sitting in a covered pan on the counter. "Ah. Here it is. How big a piece you want, Aud?"

Going over to the table, I immediately sat down, frowning. "I don't want any."

"Come on, Auden. Can't be that bad, can it?"

"Well, Jake did make it."

"Looks alright," he told me about a minute later as he came back over with one plate, a huge piece of chocolate cake on it. When he saw my stare, he defended his amount claiming we were sharing.

"I told you, El, I don't want any."

"El? You don't even make that noise when you're saying my name."

"Shut up."

Smiling, he broke a piece of the cake away with his fork before holding it up to my mouth. "Open wide."

"Eli-"

When opened my mouth to speak, he almost choked me because it was then that he decided to shove some cake down my throat.

"Jerk," I coughed before swallowing.

"See? Good. Jake did a good job," he told me, taking a bite of it himself. "Wish I had some ice cream though."

"We have some, honey, if you want it."

I glanced over as Karen came back into the room, immediately going over to the freezer to get what her son wanted.

"Eli, can we go soon?" I whispered to him as Joseph came into the room, the game no doubt at a commercial now. "I'm tired."

"In a minute, Aud. When I finish eating this, alright? Or are you that sick?" He glanced at me now as his mother scoped some ice cream onto his plate. "We can go now, I guess. I just-"

"Auden, if you're honestly sick, let me give you something better than aspirin," Karen said, leaving the ice cream on the table as she went over to the cabinet. "I think I have some flu medicine in here if you think you have that."

"It's just my head, that's all. I don't need anything else."

"Are you sure? You hardly ate."

"That's 'cause she's trying to lose weight, Mom," Eli said, frowning when I elbowed him. "What? You are."

"That's probably the culprit," Karen said as Joseph got a bowl to get himself some ice cream also. Turning to stare at me again, she said, "You need to eat, Auden. What have you been eating? Just salad? That's not enough."

"That's not all I've been eating," I told her. "Eli's being stupid."

"She never eats," Eli told his mother. "I'm serious."

"How would you know, Eli? We're together, what? A few weekends out of the month?"

Shrugging, he went back to his cake. "Whatever, Aud. I really don't care if you eat or not. Starve if you want."

"Eli." His mother hit him in the back of the head as she came to sit down at the table with us. "Honestly."

He just kept eating his cake, not even looking at me now. Joseph, who took the last seat at the table, decided he should at least speak to me.

"How was school this week, Auden?" he asked as I rested my head in my hands.

Glancing over at him, I said, "Alright."

"Sure you're not hungry, babe?" Eli reached towards the cake pan, planning on getting more. "Not even for ice cream?"

"I said no, Eli."

He didn't like my tone. I could tell from the way his face changed after that. If I was going to be mean to him, no doubt he thought he could be just as mean back.

"Whatever," he grumbled, getting some more ice cream too. Sighing, Karen warned him not to eat too much.

It was silent for a few minutes until Joseph started tapping the end of his fork on the table. Karen let it go on for a minute or two, but after that, she unleashed on him.

"Joseph!"

"What?" He frowned at her outburst, glancing at us before back at her. "What is wrong with you?"

"Would you stop that?"

"Stop wh-"

"Taping your stupid fork on the table. Can you be more annoying?"

Exasperated, he said, "Karen, what do you want from me?"

"I want you to go back in there and watch the stupid game. Just leave me alone."

"Leave you alone? On the one night that all of the kids are gone you want me to leave you alone? Really?" Joseph shook his head. "Do you know how rare it is for us to be together, in this house, completely alone? Do you know what I planned for us to do tonight?"

I think we all had a pretty good idea. Eli, though, was oblivious to this or at least he appeared to be as he continued eating his cake.

"Oh what, Joseph? After that young girl's got you all…bothered, you want me to-"

"Is that what I said? Huh? Besides, Karen, how was I supposed to know what she looked like? I wanted to do this tonight either way."

"So she did get you-"

"Enough."

"Don't cut me off, Joseph."

"Then don't accuse me of things."

"I'm not accusing you, Joseph. I'm telling you what you did, what you know you did, and that I didn't like it."

"Oh, like you've never stared at another man, Karen."

"I've never stared at my child's boyfriend!"

"Welp." Eli stood suddenly. "I'll take my cake to go. Come on, Aud."

After cutting another, bigger piece, Eli walked out of the room, me quickly behind.

"Wait, Auden."

I glanced back as Karen went over to the cabinet, grabbing a pill bottle. "No, I-"

"Take two of these before you go to bed. If you still don't feel better in the morning, call me, alright?"

I took the pill bottle from her, sighing. "Thanks."

"And eat something tonight, huh?" She smiled then, reaching out to pat my cheek. "Those are drowsy. They'll knock you out. So if Eli's drinking, you don't drink. It's not good with pills like those."

After thanking her one more time, I headed out of the house. When I glanced back into the kitchen I saw that Karen was now standing next to her husband, who had pushed his chair back slightly, clearly trying to get her to sit in the his lap. Guess they're gonna make up tonight…

"You drive," Eli told me once I got in the car. He was in the passenger seat, eating his cake. "I'm hungry still."

"You're ravenous," I sighed as he handed me the keys. "Something to add to your vocabulary, huh?"

He nodded at the pill bottle I had sat down on the center console. "What'd she give you?"

"Medicine. Said it wasn't good to mix with alcohol."

"Ha. You hardly drink."

I shrugged. "It'll put me to sleep. Or so she says."

"Good. You haven't been sleeping well."

"I've been sleeping fine."

Shrugging, he ate some more of his cake. "Jake makes a good cake."

"From what was forced down my throat, I'd have to concur."

He laughed slightly. "So are we going home?"

"I am. Did you want me to drop you off somewhere?"

"When my baby's sick? No. I'm going home with her to nurse her back to health."

"So basically you're going to pass out drunk in the living room while I sleep in the bedroom."

"Basically."

* * *

"Auden? Baby, you've been asleep for hours."

My eyelids felt too heavy to lift, but I managed it. "Eli?"

He was standing at my bedside, smiling down at me. "You've been passed out for awhile now, babe. You okay?"

"Mmm."

"Man, I have to take some of that stuff, huh?"

Closing my eyes once more, I snuggled back into the pillow as I mumbled something incoherently. I felt Eli's hand stroke the back of my head, sighing slightly.

"I love you," he whispered as he leaned down to kiss the back of my head. "But you need to get up."

"No."

"Are you still that tired?"

I didn't move which only succeeded in lulling me back to sleep. I slept for a few more hours I'm sure because when I finally got up and looked at a clock, it was five in the afternoon.

Groaning, I pushed myself out of bed before heading out of the room. I found no one home, which was fine. I knew I had bad morning (afternoon?) breath and my hair was a total mess. Heading into the kitchen, I got myself something to drink before going to take a shower.

"Aud!"

I was in the middle of washing my hair when Eli got home. Sighing, I quickly rinsed all of the shampoo out of my hair before turning off the shower.

"What's going on?" I asked as he came into the bathroom. He took a moment to enjoy the view as I got out of the shower, waiting until I was wrapped up in a towel to speak. "Eli?"

"You won't believe what happened!"

"What is it?"

Jumping up onto the bathroom counter, Eli watched as I dried myself off. "Kelly got in today."

"In?"

"She came down to see the kids."

"Oh." This wasn't new to me. The only reason that Taylor and Jordan were down here this week was because their school had some kind of four day weekend. Kelly was going to come down to get them on Saturday so she could see Vinny. This was nothing new.

"And she brought her new boyfriend."

That made me pause. "Seriously?"

"Yeah. Steven is pissed." He laughed then making me frown. "What?"

"That's not funny," I said as I dropped the towel, pulling on my underwear now. "That's sad."

"Since when are you a fan of Steven and Kelly?"

"I'm not," I told him. "I am, however, somewhat invested in the lives of their sons and don't want to see them getting hurt."

Eli shook his head at me as I put my bra on. "You just don't get it."

"No, I do. I know that you and Steven haven't gotten along for the past few months and that's fine, but he's still your brother."

That got a snort. "Oh yeah?"

"Yes, Eli."

"Where's Hollis then, huh?"

"Eli-"

"Don't throw stones, babe."

I didn't mean to get so close to him, but once I was within reach, Eli grabbed me from behind, pulling me to stand in between his legs.

"We're going over to my parents in, oh, about an hour," he told me as he kissed my shoulder blade.

"Why?" I whined, glancing back at him.

"Mom says that we have to 'cause of the kids."

"Is Kelly's boyfriend gonna be there?"

"Yeah."

"Is Steven?"

"No. He refuses."

"Mmmm." Closing my eyes, I said, "At least the boys get to see their mom. And Taylor. All of them get to be together, I mean."

"Yeah," he sighed, stroking my stomach. "At least that."

It took me about an hour to get ready. Once I was, I headed out with Eli, slightly annoyed that my Friday and Saturday nights were having to be spent with the Stocks. Still, they had done a lot for me, so what was I supposed to do?

Karen was waiting on the front porch for us when we pulled up. Or, well, she was on the phone with someone, but hung up the second we got out of the car.

"Eli, did you bring the ice cream like I asked?" To me, Karen said, "Joseph finished the rest last night."

"Yes, Mom," he said, holding up the grocery bag as proof. I was barely passed the front steps when Karen pulled me in for a hug. I glanced at Eli, but he just smiled at me before continuing on into the house.

"How are you feeling?" she asked when she finally let me go. "Eli said you slept all day."

"I did."

"Have you eaten?"

"No, but-"

"Oh, Auden," she sighed, staring at me now before back down at her phone. Then, almost in a whisper, she told me, "That was Heidi, by the way."

"What'd she want?"

"She's coming to dinner too."

I frowned. "Um…why?"

Sighing, she said, "She thinks that Eli's going to propose to you tonight and is angry that I'm trying to keep her from-"

"Can I just go ahead and tell you both, tonight, that that's not happening any time soon. At all. Really. If it did, I would say no."

Karen just looked passed me, clearly not too concerned with me and her son's love life. Shaking her head, she turned towards the house. "Come on, Auden. Come meet Henry."

"Henry?"

"The new boyfriend."

"Ah."

And let me just say before anything else that Henry is in one word hot. Very hot. Hot enough that even Jake and Eli took notice in that envious sort of way guys had about each other. He was in the living room, talking with Joseph, when Karen introduced us. The second he moved to shake my hand though, Eli was there, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and leading me to the kitchen to talk about something.

"He's hot," I whispered to Eli. "You know that?"

"Yeah, I've noticed."

Told you.

It was really more of the whole presence he had. Henry was tall, but so was Steven. He was dark headed, again, as was Steven. Yes they both had green eyes. And yeah, okay, Steven worked out some, but Henry? I had no doubt he could squish Eli's head until juice came out. Seriously.

"Like, ten times as hot as your brother."

"Remember, Aud, I am my mother's son."

I just smiled at him before glancing out into the backyard where I could see the kids playing tag. Kelly was out there, watching them while talking to her oldest on the porch. Isby and Jake were out there with her other two kids, clearly both enjoying themselves.

"Heidi's coming," I told Eli as he pulled out a chair for me at the kitchen table. We both knew that I wasn't going out there to socialize with that woman and we both also knew that there was no way Eli would let me spend more than a few seconds with Henry. So, in short, this was the only place for us.

"Here?"

"For dinner."

"…Why?"

"She thinks you're going to-"

"I swear to God this woman is going to kill me." He shook his head when I laughed. "It's not funny. All she ever asks me now is when I'm going to do it. And I'm not."

"Ever."

"Any time soon."

"Ever."

"Auden."

I just smiled at him as he leaned towards me, brushing his lips against the top of my head.

"I had some weird dreams last night," I told him as he moved back to his own seat.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. Just…freaky ones. Likes…I don't even understand why they were so creepy, but they were."

"That happens with medicine like that."

We both glanced up as Karen came into the room, going to stir the pot on the stove.

"It got her to sleep though," Eli told his mother as if I were a child or a puppy or something. "For a long time."

"You're probably running yourself ragged, Auden," his mother told me. "Didn't you start your job this week?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

Eli just smiled at me. "You're okay though, huh, Auden? Just tired. You're always tired. It'll all be over in a few months anyways."

"Yeah," I sighed.

"Then you can come down here and live with me. I have it on good authority that you can get a job at the bike shop."

Karen looked over at us, rolling her eyes. "Anyways, Auden, are you hungry? Dinner won't be ready for another two hours. You should probably eat."

"I'm fine."

"You haven't eaten yet, right?" She glanced over at her son. "Eli, make her a sandwich, huh?"

"Ew, gross."

"Eli."

"I'm fine," I told his mother as he got up, though it was just to get a soda.

"Here." Eli tossed me a pack of crackers before popping the tab on his soda. "Eat those."

Karen sent her son a look, but he didn't say anything. Instead he just came to stand behind my chair, one hand on my shoulder, squeezing gently.

"Seriously, babe," he whispered in my ear as he leaned down. "If you want me to make you something-"

"I'm fine, Eli."

The side of my head got a kiss before Eli headed into the living room, leaving me alone with his mother. Sigh. This was beginning to get repetitive…

I didn't have long to stay in the kitchen anyways, as it was only a short time later that Heidi arrived. She was dateless and ready to steal Kelly's boyfriend. Later that night she told me it was only fair after what Kelly called me over the summer.

When it was finally time for dinner, all of the adults sat out in the dining room while I sat in the kitchen with the boys and Thisbe. Heidi kept hinting to me that I might want to eat in the dining room, that something might happen there, but I ignored her. When will she get that Eli's not that kind of guy? Will he propose one day? I'm sure. Will he invite everyone over? Definitely not.

"Auden, I like your hair," Vinny told me as we ate our dinner away from everyone else. You'd think Kelly would want to be in here, with her kids. You'd think.

"Thank you."

He nodded. "It's pretty."

"So is yours, Vinny."

"No," he said, giving me a look. "Mine is cool. I'm a boy, Auden."

Okay… Looking over at his brother, I smiled at him.

"How's school been, Jordan?" I asked as Thisbe popped the tab on her soda. Vinny was watching it like a hawk, secretly hoping it would explode. It did not.

"Good," he told me. "I'm glad I got to go home instead of get stuck here with stupid Vinny."

"I'm not stupid! I'm a lot smarter than you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"That's enough, guys," I told them, frowning. "That wasn't nice, Jordan. Apologize to him."

"No."

"Jordan."

"Sorry, Vinny," he grumbled, crossing his arms. Sigh. At least Taylor wasn't at the table also. That really would have killed me…

* * *

"You don't think it's weird that we just ate dinner with your brother's wife's boyfriend?"

Eli just watched me as I changed into nightclothes. "Well, yeah, when you put it like that."

"He's not mad at your parents?"

"I'm sure he is, but he's also living with them. Not much complaint he can make there, huh?" Eli patted the spot next to the bed, wanting me to lay down with him. I'm sure it wasn't because he just wanted to sleep, but where else was I going to go? Besides, I was headed back in the morning anyways.

"Mmmm, Eli," I sighed as I laid down.

"What's wrong? You still don't feel well?"

"No. I'm just tired is all."

"How tired?"

"Eli-"

"I'll miss you," he told me as he snuggled up to me. I rolled onto my stomach, groaning. "So much. This will help me get through that. I love you."

"If that's your plan for getting in my pants, you should rethink it."

"Oh, no that was just to get you ready. I was getting in them with or without your permission."

"Shut up, Eli."

He just laughed slightly, kissing my head. "I love you though, Aud. Very much."

"Mmm."

"So…?"

"No."

Huffing, Eli moved away from me, staring up at the ceiling. "I've gotta get something to drink."

"Then go. I'm going to bed. I have to head back in the morning."

"Can't we even, like, mess around or-"

"Eli, shut up. God."

He made a noise before getting out of bed and walking out of the room. Probably to go get drunk. I don't care anymore. I really don't.

* * *

"Auden. Auden. Aud-"

"Eli, go away."

My drunk boyfriend just sat there on the end of the bed, staring at me. "Let's have sex."

"Eli, fuck off."

"Auden. Auden. Auden. Aud-"

"I swear to God, Eli, you're gonna get kicked out of the room."

He stifled at that. "No! This is _my_ apartment, Auden!"

I just rolled over, cuddling into the bed. "Baby, I'm sick, okay? Come hold me."

He tried to tell me something, but it didn't come out the way he wanted, so he just got up and stumbled out of the room. I waited to hear the front door open, but it didn't, so he was okay.

I laid around in bed until seven in the morning. When my alarm went off, I just got up and gathered my stuff before heading out. I found Eli in the living room, passed out on the couch. Sighing, I took my stuff out to my car before coming back to take care of him.

"Eli," I sighed, laying a blanket over him. "I'm leaving, okay?"

His eyes opened briefly, but they quickly shut again. "Love you."

"I love you too, but I have to go." I kissed his head. "I'll put coffee on, huh?"

"Mmm."

I got him the bottle of aspirin and set it on the coffee table next to a cup of water before heading out. He did this to himself, after all.

It was a long, boring ride back home. Next weekend I'd work and Eli would either come see me or we just wouldn't see each other. I honestly was leaning more towards just not seeing each other because I really didn't feel like putting up with him. Dealing with him in Colby is completely different from dealing with him at home.

When I finally got home, the first thing I did was take a shower. I loved my new apartment for everything it was and hated it for what it wasn't. I got to be alone, I didn't have to deal with whoever Maggie was sleeping with that week, and I didn't have to worry about anyone eating my food. What I didn't like though was that it was quiet now, all alone. For all the things Maggie wasn't able to do to me now, there was also the list of things I wished she could do.

Going into my bedroom, I called Eli, but he didn't pick up. Apparently me getting home safely wasn't as important as his drunk slumber. I feel insulted.

I was studying by the time my phone rang. I immediately thought it was Eli calling me back. Instead it was my mother.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Auden. How are you doing today?"

"Fine," I told her, guarded. "I just got back from Colby."

"How's your sister?"

"Good."

"And Eli?"

Drunk. "Fine."

"That's good."

There was an awkward beat where neither of us knew what to say. She fixed this though.

"So for Thanksgiving Hollis is coming. He's bringing his new girlfriend."

I blinked. "Oh."

"And I was thinking that you could come. And bring Eli. Thisbe too."

"Mom," I sighed. "Holidays are pretty important to Eli's family."

"And there's not to ours?"

Again with the blinking. "I've never though so, no."

"Auden, I just think it would be a good thing for us all if you and your boyfriend come to dinner at my house. We never do anything all as a family. You kids aren't getting any younger."

Neither is she, really, but I left that unsaid.

"Mom, I just don't think-"

"Fine, Auden. Fine. If you don't care about-"

"What if we eat with you guys on another night? Friday? Or Wednesday? Or something? Would that be okay?"

"Well," she began slowly. "I guess that Wednesday sounds good."

"Great. We'll go to your house for dinner on Wednesday and then be back in Colby for Thursday."

"If that's how you want to do this."

"It is." I paused. "Mom, you do realize that September isn't even over yet, right?"

"Thanksgiving is fast approaching, Auden. Just like the Spring is. Have you decided what you're going to-"

"Mom, I told you. After I graduate I'm moving in with Eli, like we've talked about."

"I just don't see that as a good game plan."

"I know you don't," I told her, shaking my head. "That doesn't mean that I'm not going to do it though."

"Well, I think that this conversation is over then."

"I guess it is."

She hung up on me, but that was okay, really. I didn't care. It wasn't ten minutes after she hung up that my phone rang again. Somewhere in my mind I guess I kind of hoped that it was her, calling back to apologize, but of course it wasn't. Of course.

"Are you back home yet?"

I smiled even though she couldn't see it through the phone. "Yes. Is Eli okay?"

"Hmmm? Oh, Auden, I don't know. I assume so. Why? I haven't seen him," Karen told me. "Should I go check on him?"

"He was awake when I left," I told her. "You should probably send Jake or Steven over there to just check on him though."

"I'm sure he's fine," she sighed. Then, after a pause, she told me, "I was just calling to make sure that you're feeling better."

"I am, actually. I guess that I just needed to sleep more."

"That medicine probably helped."

"Well, Eli sure didn't," I mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing."

She sighed. "Auden, he just needs help."

"I know."

"It runs in his family. Drinking." She sighed. "Joey never had that problem, but… I don't know what to do for him, Auden. He'll probably get better when you finally come down here for good. He listens to you better than anyone."

"Then he must not listen to anyone at all."

"What you say to him, Auden, sticks with him. It honestly does. He's getting better. Slowly, albeit, but he is."

I just shook my head. "You'd know better than me. You're with him more."

"For now I am."

I spoke with Karen for a few more minutes before hanging up. It was odd to me that having a conversation with a woman that was no relation to me whatsoever was more pleasurable than one with my own mother, but then again, who did that shock?


	3. Chapter 3

Autumn Leaves

Chapter 3

"This sucks."

"Oh, lighten up, Jake. Could be worse. Remember the year we went and it was raining? Remember that? That sucked. This is fun," Steven said as he and Eli pulled the ice chest out of the back of the truck. "Besides, at least you got the long weekend off from work, huh?"

It was then that Joseph pulled up in his truck, Karen quickly stepping out before moving to get the kids out. I had ridden with Eli, Jake, and Steven, a decision at the time I thought was a good one, considering I wouldn't have to put up with my little sister and Vinny for the two hour drive, but I quickly realized what I had to deal with instead; Steven and Jake Stock.

"We're here, we're here, we're here," Thisbe chanted as she got out of the truck and made a beeline for me. "Auden, we're here!"

"I know."

"Thisbe ain't ever been campin' before," Vinny reminded me as he too got out of the truck. "You know, 'cause she's a girl."

"No," Thisbe protested as she clutched my leg. "No, that's not true. Your granny is a girl and she goes camping."

"Granny is not a girl, Thisbe," Vinny said as Joseph let Ralph out of the bed of the truck. "Granny is a woman. Just like you, Auden," he added, smiling at me before heading over to Ralph. "Like how I'm a man. You're just a little, whiny, girl though, Thisbe."

"No!"

"Guys, knock it off," Eli told them as he and his older brother continued to take things out of the bed of his truck. "I mean it."

"Can we go fishing, Grandpa?" Vinny asked then. "And then can I pee in the woods like a doggy?"

"All in due time, boy," Joseph told him, going to help his sons unload. "Gotta set up camp first."

Karen just sighed, going to take a seat on top of the ice chest. "Remind me why we like this, Joey."

"Because we get to be together as a family."

"Mmmm…nope." She shook her head at him, but he just sent her a look over his shoulder.

"Well, I'mma go pee now," Vinny announced. The he pointed. "Over there. In the trees. Like a dog. 'cause that's fun. You know that, Thisbe?"

"What?"

"You gotta pee outside. Like animals. Come on!"

"No," I said, grabbing Thisbe's hand as the two of them ran passed. "You stay here, Thisbe."

"Fine!" Vinny stuck his tongue out at me before heading off. Karen nodded at Jake.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Go with him," his mother told him.

"Why me?"

"You're not helping anything."

"Neither is Auden."

"Go, Jake. I mean it."

He grumbled as he passed, calling out that Vinny better not get out too far ahead of him, because then a big mean bear would eat him. I just shook my head as I went to sit next to Karen on the ice chest.

Why did I decide to go camping with the Stocks? Mainly because when Eli asked, I thought it was just the two of us. We were going to bring beer and get drunk together and do all sorts of fun, couple things. Well, sex mainly, but lots of versions of it. Or at least that's what Eli was hoping to get out of it, I'm sure.

The issue occurred when Eli asked his father for one of their tents, saying that he and I were just going to go camping alone. Of course, Joseph couldn't resist the urge to make it a family outing. Of course. And how could Eli say no? His parents did do a lot for us after all. And Thisbe and Vinny had another long weekend for some reason, which gave them a reason to go. And of course, Jake and Steven were never ones to turn down fishing and drinking. So, needless to say, very little sex will be had this weekend. At least I hope…

"Auden," Thisbe whined, coming over to me. "Is there really a bear?"

"Shhh," I sighed, pulling her closer to me. "Jake's just being a butt."

"Ain't that the truth," Eli mumbled to me as he and Steven went to work on one of the tents. He had been in a bad mood which was understandable considering his family had ruined his sex and alcohol filled weekend. I just smiled at him before shaking my head.

"It's kind of cold, Joey," Karen told him, rubbing her arms. He immediately stopped what he was doing to get his jacket out of the truck for her.

"Here you go," he said, smiling at her. She let him kiss her head before slipping the jacket on. I looked to Eli to see if he would take into consideration that I was probably cold too, but he was too focused on tying his shoe to care.

When all was said and done, Jake, Joseph, Karen, and the two little ones went to go fish, Steven claiming he was going to collect firewood for later that night. Eli and I stayed behind at camp, trying to spend that alone time we planned together.

"Three tents. How is this going to work?"

Eli glanced at me. We were both sitting on opposite ends of camp, me still on the ice chest while he was on the ground, near the tents.

"Well," he said slowly. "Mom and Dad together."

"Right."

"Me and you together."

"Sure."

"And Jake and Steven."

"Alright."

"Then Vinny and Thisbe can sleep wherever they want. Vinny likes to sleep outside the tent, in his sleeping bag, but Mom only lets him if one of us sleeps out there with him. She's always worried about him running out."

"He is very adventurous."

"That is he," he agreed.

I paused for a moment before asking, "Don't you think it would have been fun?"

"What, Aud?" He looked up from the ground, which he had been picking at. "What would be fun?"

I was self-conscious now as I wrapped my arms around myself. Karen was right. Autumn had begun and it was chilly.

"If we had a boy."

The wind picked up a little bit as Eli and I both stared at each other, neither of us sure where to go.

"You mean instead of-"

"What I mean is if we had a son, it would have been fun. I mean nothing more than that."

He blinked before tossing his head to the side. He did this sometimes, I think because he had a hard time remembering that he no longer had long hair, that he could see just fine, that there was no hair in his eyes. Whatever the reason, it usually was funny and kind of cute. Now it was just annoying.

"I never thought about it. I mean, after we found out that Clayton was a girl, I just never… She would have been fun too, Auden."

"I didn't say she wouldn't."

"I know, I just-"

"God, Eli, you twist everything."

Frowning, he said, "I'm not trying to twist anything, Aud. Honest. I just meant-"

"I just said that I would have liked to have a son. Or would still like, I guess."

He just stared for a moment. "Did you…want to try again? Or something? 'cause I was thinking, you know, we could wait until you were out of school and stuff. You know, when you had a good job and, maybe, if I had a better job and we had a house and were married or whatever. You know? But, if you want, I mean I don't…"

"Eli…"

"Aud, I just want you to know that-"

A bark cut him off, making us both look up. It was just Steven and Ralph though. I had forgotten that the dog had gone with him to find firewood.

"Hope I wasn't interrupting much," the oldest Stock boy said as he came into the clearing. He sat the wood in his arms down quickly before coming over to me. "Gotta get a drink, Auden."

"Oh," I said, standing up before going over to Eli, quickly taking my place on the ground in between his legs. Eli just kissed my neck, pulling me closer.

"You guys hungry?" Steven went over to the truck, reaching in there before pulling out the half eaten bag of chips we had left in there from the car ride down. "I am."

"We were kind of liking our alone time," Eli told him as I curled back into him.

"Ha. Enjoy it while you're young, kids."

Letting out a hard sigh, Eli stood, pulling me along with him. "We'll be back later, around sundown. Come on, Aud."

I followed along behind him while Steven just continued eating his chips, watching us walk away.

"Where are we going, Eli?"

"Somewhere where we can be alone," he told me simply.

"Just don't get us lost."

"Me? Get us lost? Never."

We ended up by a little stream that no doubt ran to the lake Joseph and the others were fishing at. Taking a seat by the stream, Eli quickly pulled me into his lap once more.

"Mmmm," I sighed, leaning back into him. "This is nice."

"It'd be nicer if they didn't come along," he mumbled to me. "We could be in our tent right now, drinking and having sex."

"At the same time? You sure are talented."

"Ha ha, Auden. You're so funny." He ran a hand up my stomach. "So…did you want to try again?"

I took a deep breath, closing my eyes. "I don't even know if I want to ever try again."

He paused. "Ever?"

"Ever."

"Auden-"

"What if I can't, Eli?"

"Can't what? You can get pregnant."

"No, stupid, I know I can get pregnant."

Now that I had called him stupid, he wasn't as receptive towards me. "Then what? Huh? What can't you do?"

"…Actually have one."

"What?"

"I know that I can conceive, Eli, but I'm afraid that…what if I can't actually give birth? Like that's why Clayton-"

"Auden, it was one time. It's not like we wanted it that way. It just happened."

"Yeah," I sighed. "I know. I just mean, if we tried again and I couldn't…get to the end. Like I couldn't give birth. What if I miscarry? Or have a stillbirth? Or-"

"What are the chances of that? Huh?"

"Any chance of it is too high for me."

"Auden-"

"We could always, like, adopt. Later. If we wanted. Instead of having another."

Eli kissed my neck. "Later though. No matter what."

"No matter what."

"So…are we going to start using-"

I hung my head as I said, "I don't know. Can we…I…we never use protection. Ever."

"We could though. Or you could go on the-"

"I don't want to."

He sighed. "Then later very well could be now, Auden."

"Eli, can we…can we not do this now?" I glanced back at him. He just captured my lips though.

"We can do whatever you want, baby."

I didn't correct him as I turned to face the stream once more. "We won't be having sex this weekend anyways."

"Yeah," he grumbled. "I know."

Laughing slightly, I ran a hand down his knee. "Even if we never have another kid, Eli, I do love you.'

"I know you do," he told me. "I've always known."

* * *

"Ghost stories," Vinny responded to his grandfather's question of what to do next. It was night now and we were roasting hotdogs over the fire. Well, everyone else was. I was half asleep leaning up against Eli's arm, not really one up for this whole camping thing.

"You wanna hear a ghost story, huh?" Joseph smiled over at the boy who was sitting in his father's lap, clearly excited about being able to stay up so late. Really, it was only about eight, but that was apparently late for Vinny on a Friday night.

"Yes," Vinny said, nodding his head. "Thisbe can't listen though 'cause she's a baby."

"Hey!"

Eli, who was really focusing on sneaking another beer by drinking mine, told his nephew to knock it off before he made him go to bed.

"You're not my dad! You can't tell me what to do, Eli! That's why I hate you."

That got him hit in the head by his father. "Knock it off, Vinny."

"Granny!"

"Don't hit him," Karen said, frowning at her oldest. "Honestly, Steven. Do you know how rare it was for us to strike you?"

Sighing, I started to get up, thinking that my day with the Stocks was over. I was ready to finally go to bed. As I stood though, Jake suddenly made his reappearance. He had been gone most of the evening, disappearing around sundown, claiming that he wanted to spend some time alone.

"Welp," he announced himself as he made it back to the clearing. "I think you should all know that I'm in love."

Karen, who was now eating a hotdog, just rolled her eyes. "Gracie. We know."

"What?" He filled my place quickly. "Oh. Her. No. I think that's over. I've met someone. Here."

"What?" His father frowned over at this as Karen leaned into his arm.

"Yep. She's camping with some of her friends. All hot. I think I'mma crash there tonight." Then he looked at his brother. "You can tag along, Steven. You too, Eli. If you want."

"Jake," I complained, stopping at Eli and my tent. "Are you serious right now?"

"…I don't like your tone. As one of the only non-Stocks here, I think you should apologize."

This time, it was Eli who hit someone in the back of the head and it was his brother. Joseph just sighed, telling Jake something then that I didn't hear as I went into the tent and immediately huddled into one of the sleeping bags.

"Auden?"

I was mostly asleep at that point and hardly opened my eyes as someone crawled into the tent with me. I knew it was Vinny from his voice and from the fact when he was close enough, he quickly huddled against my back.

"Hmmm?"

"I'm scared. I wanna sleep in here with you. Not Daddy and Jake. Okay?"

"Mmmhmm."

"They're mean. They're laughing at me. For being scared. Called me a baby."

"Mmmm."

"It's not fair. Grandpa is scary."

"Mmmm."

He yawned then as he got into the sleeping bag with me. "Night, Auden."

"Mmmm."

"We gotta say our prayers."

Sighing, I finally spoke.

"Vinny, I don't-"

"You have to, Auden. Don't you wanna go to Heaven?"

I rolled over to face him now, taking in his childish face and voice of faith. I thought of what the Stocks would do to me if I even so much as told Vinny Heaven might not be real and knew that was not an option.

"You say it," I told him as I nestled down into the sleeping bag. "And get in the other sleeping bag."

He giggled, doing so. "Okay."

I was laying there for some time after Vinny said his prayers, just watching him sleep. I don't care what Eli thinks; having a son would have been fun.

"Waiting up for me?"

I was still laying there in the dark when Eli came into the tent. He stank of beer, but I knew he wasn't drunk. He had only had a few after all.

"Mmm," I moaned. "Vinny woke me up."

Elli, on his knees, pulled his shirt off before getting into the sleeping bag with his nephew. "Oh."

"What'd you guys do to him?"

"Nothing. He just kept making fun of Thisbe and then when he got scared and started to get upset, he thought we should baby him. He needs to learn the consequences of his actions."

"So let me guess, Karen was in bed already."

"Well, duh."

Sighing, I shifted slightly before asking, "Where's my sister?"

"With Mom and Dad, I think. Either that or with Jake and Steven."

"Oh, that narrows it down. Thanks."

"She's fine," he told me, settled down for the night. "You think I'd leave her out there alone? That's my best friend, you know."

"Yeah," I sighed, closing my eyes. "I know."

* * *

I woke up early the next morning, my boyfriend and his nephew both choosing to sleep in. What else was new though? So with a slight sigh, I headed out of the tent, changing my clothes before doing so.

"Up so soon?"

"Yeah," I sighed when I found Karen already up, my sister with her. They were walking back to camp, clearly having gone somewhere. To the bathroom, maybe. Or a hike. Something. "The boys are all still asleep?"

She smiled at me. "Joey and the boys stayed up late last night."

"Not Vinny," Thisbe told her. "He went to sleep with Auden 'cause Jake and Mr. Steven were mean to him."

"I've heard. I'll have to talk to them about that, huh?" To me, she added, "I'm sorry about Vinny, Auden. He just…likes you for some reason."

"Yeah," I sighed as I went to sit down on the ice chest. "I've noticed."

"Not as much as me. I'm his best friend," Thisbe interceded, clearly thinking I was trying to take that title from her.

"Trust me, I couldn't care less," I told her, shaking my head slightly. "Besides, Eli and I are going back tomorrow morning."

"What?" Thisbe frowned. "How come?"

"I have work, Thisbe. Not to mention school."

"How come I don't got school?"

That was actually an interesting question. To me it seemed that Colby gave them too many days off, but who am I to judge? Just so long as my father doesn't find out.

"I dunno, Thisbe," I told her as she came over to me.

"I think it's 'cause I'm smarter than you and don't need it."

"Well," I said slowly as she climbed into my lap. "I don't think it's nice of you to say something like that."

"I'm not nice," she told me. "I'm mean."

"Thisbe," Karen corrected as she frowned over at us. "Behave."

She grumbled as I sat her down before standing. Still, I just looked to my boyfriend's mother.

"Now what?"

"Hmmm?"

"Now what do we do?"

She just sighed, shaking her head. "This is what we do. This is camping, Auden."

I blinked before turning on my heel. "Welp, I'm going back to b-"

A loud belch startled me as Steven came out of his tent making his mother cut her eyes.

"Honestly, Steven," she said, frowning.

"Mom, it's the woods. I can be loud."

She just shook her head before looking at Thisbe. "Hey, Thisbe, if you go wake up Vinny, I bet he'd like to go play in the water."

"Mom," Steven started. "If you're gonna take them to play in the lake, you're gonna have to get in there with them. You know that. Safety and all."

"You're half right, Steven," she said, staring openly at him. "One of us does needs to be in there with them. And you're gonna be that person."

"What? Mom-"

"Have fun," she told him as she turned to go get back in her tent, probably to rouse her husband. Thisbe dove into my tent, wanting her little friend to get up.

To the cursing Steven, I asked, "Where's Ralph?"

"He slept with us, since we didn't have either kid," he grumbled out as he went back into his tent to get dressed. I just headed into my own tent, not shocked to find both kids up and bothering Eli to go swimming with them too.

"Guys," I sighed. "Eli and I are going to sleep some more while you guys swim. Okay? We'll join you later, maybe, if we're not tired anymore. Okay?"

It took another ten minutes before Eli and I were completely alone in our tent. Then we moved into one sleeping bag, which was a tight, but comfortable fit, to catch a few more winks. Or, well, that was my idea for our alone time.

"Eli, stop it," I hissed to him as he started kissing my neck. "We are not doing that here."

"Aud-"

"No."

"But I love you."

"Yeah, well, love me when we get home."

"You'll be at your home. Not my home."

"Then love me next week or something. Just not here."

"Why not, Aud?

"I just…can't, with your parents and brother so close. Sorry."

He just closed his eyes. "Then I'm sleeping."

I leaned up and kissed under his chin. "Can you do it in your own sleeping bag?"

"Don't push me, Auden. I will go sleep in another tent and leave you here, all alone for a bear to eat."

"A bear, huh?"

"A grizzly."

"Ooh, so scary."

"It is."

"There are no bears here, Eli."

"That's what you think."

I just cuddled into him, closing my eyes. "Yeah, that is what I think."

* * *

"Are you relaxed yet?"

I wiggled my toes before saying, "No."

Eli and I had gone down to take over watching the kids. They were no longer in the water, as neither Eli nor I were planning to get wet. Instead, Vinny and Thisbe were looking for bugs in the mud, Ralph laying at their side, sleeping. There were some other people out around the lake now, mostly men though, further down, fishing.

As for Eli and I, we were seating in the dirt, me with my flip-flops kicked off as I rested my feet in my boyfriend's lap, leaning back on my palms while he massaged my feet. I knew I'd be in for something later, when we were alone, for requesting it, but I couldn't help it. My feet weren't made for so much walking.

"Mmmm," I groaned, glancing over at my little sister and Eli's nephew. They were digging around in the mud, getting thoroughly dirty. Still, they were staying out of our hair, so what could it hurt? "Eli, my neck's tight too."

"Yeah, well, I was horny before, but look where that ended up. Nowhere."

That would have gotten him a glare, but I didn't feel up to it. Instead, I just hung my head back, staring at the sky.

"Your feet feeling better, babe?"

"Mmmm."

"So I can call you that now?"

"If you keep doing that, you can call me whatever you want."

"Whatever I want?"

"Within reason."

"Okay, honey."

"No."

"But-"

"Within reason."

"Sure, cuddle monster."

"You're about to get kicked in the face."

"Ooh, so sc- Auden!"

I had just tapped him with my foot, but it still made him push my feet out of his lap.

"Oh, Eli-"

"That was uncalled for." He toed his sandals off. "My turn now."

"Ew. No."

"Come on, Aud."

"Your feet are disgusting."

"Oh, like yours were roses."

"Eli-"

"I'm waiting, Auden," he said, placing his feet in my lap. I glared at him.

"You're lucky I like you."

"I think you mean love, Aud."

"No, Eli, I don't."

So anyways, while I was busy massaging his feet, Vinny and Thisbe were busy with something else.

"Guys," Eli called over to them. "Don't eat bugs. You guys are getting too old to do stupid stuff like that."

"Shut up, Eli!" Vinny spit at us, though he was so far away that it had no chance of reaching. "I hate you!"

Groaning, Eli slipped his feet out of my grasp before slipping his sandals on. "Duty calls."

I just watched as he went and picked up his nephew before walking off, no doubt to discipline him. Ralph barked once before following. Sighing, I slipped my flip-flops on as Thisbe came over to me.

"How come Eli's so mean?"

I just pulled her down next to me. "Let's talk about something else, huh?"

"Like what?"

I poked her gently in the tummy, making the young girl giggle. "Let's talk about this sleepover you went to last Saturday."

She poked me back, smiling. "How come you weren't here?"

"I told you, Isby, I had to work last weekend." I poked her once more. "Now tell me."

"Mmmm, it was fun," she said, picking at the ground. "Jamie and Skylar and Kylie were there."

"Did Vinny go?"

"Ew, Auden!" She frowned at me. "Vinny is a boy. He wasn't allowed to go."

"Oh."

"Boys are nasty."

I made a face at her. "I thought you and Vinny were best friends?"

"No. We're friends, but only when we're not at school."

"Why, Isby?"

"'cause, Auden, he's a boy."

"Boys and girls can't be friends?"

"They can. Like Hannah only plays with the boys, but she's weird. She doesn't like to color or play ponies or dolls. She doesn't even play with us at recess. She plays games with the boys."

"You like playing games with the boys, huh? Like when you go bike riding with Eli and Vinny, huh? Or playing basketball with Jake? And Mr. Stock takes you guys to the batting cages sometimes, huh?"

"That's different, Auden. Jake and Eli and Mr. Joseph aren't boys. They're not nasty. And besides, Vinny's only nasty when he's with other boys. And not all boys are nasty."

"Like Kyle?" I asked, a teasing tone in my voice.

"Kyle is fun," she told me, nodding her head. "He's not stupid like Vinny."

"Stop calling Vinny stupid."

"He is though, Auden."

I was inclined to agree, but that was my boyfriend's nephew. I don't think calling him stupid would do any good. I didn't get a chance to say anything though, as it was then that someone came walking along the perimeter of the lake, headed towards us. I just watched at the man approached, not too concerned.

"Hi," he greeted the second he was next to me.

He was about my age, maybe slightly older, with dark hair that was all spiked up on his head. I'm sure that was meant to be hot, but it just looked like that thing Vinny does to his hair when his grandparents let him style it on his own. The guy before me had some wildflowers in one of his hands, clearing having picked them up along the way.

"Hi," Thisbe repeated back, standing to greet him before looking up at him. "Are you camping too?"

"Yep," he said, smiling down at her. "I was just over there fishing. With my dad and brother."

I knew that he was over here for me, but Thisbe had no idea. She was just staring up at him, smiling.

"What are those for?" She reached for the flowers. "Huh?"

"Well, I was hoping you'd ask," he said, smiling at her now. "When I was over there, fishing, I saw these and then looked over here and saw you guys."

"We're girls," Thisbe corrected.

"Pretty girls at that," he added before handing off the flowers to my younger sister. "My name's Yogi."

Thisbe frowned before smelling her flowers. "Like the bear?"

"Yep. It's just my nickname though." He looked at me finally. "My names Randal. What's yours?"

Thisbe snorted, glancing at me. "That's Auden."

"Oh." He frowned at hearing that, but just looked back at my younger sister. "What's your name?"

"I'm not allowed to tell my name to strangers," she said before glancing back at me. "But since Auden's here…my name's Thisbe."

He looked at me. "Is she serious? Auden and Thisbe?"

I sighed. "They're both-"

"An author and a woman that is suicidal. Wow. I'd think she was screwing with my head, but I don't think even she knows what her name means."

Thisbe frowned, throwing his flowers to the ground. "I do too! My name is Thisbe Caroline West! I live in Colby with my mommy. That's what Thisbe means."

I blinked. She must have thought that he was asking who she was. I guess.

"Thisbe," I sighed, standing now. She was smoldering now, glaring up at him. "He didn't mean-"

"I'm sorry," Randal said now, smiling down at her. "I didn't mean to offend you."

Thisbe just crossed her arms. "Maybe I could forgive you if you let me fish with you."

"Thisbe-"

"Sure," Randal said before looking at me. "Can Auden come?"

"Mmmm…I guess so." Thisbe let her arms drop then, bending over to pick up the flowers. "Only if she doesn't get in the way. She's not good at playing fisherman. I am though. I'm very good at it."

"I'm sure."

She looked up at me then. "Come on, Auden."

"Thisbe-"

"Who's this guy?"

I frowned as Jake Stock came barreling over, tossing an arm around me when he was close enough. Randal frowned as I shifted out from under the other guy's reach.

"I thought you were sleeping?" I crossed my arms as I glared at my boyfriend's younger brother. "And don't touch me."

"Where's Eli?" Jake frowned at the other guy while Thisbe went to work putting one of the flowers in her hair. "Huh? You drown him before you shack up with this-"

"Come on, Thisbe," I said, taking her hand now. "Let's go fishing, huh?"

She giggled, squeezing my hand before looking at Randal. "I'd ask Auden if she wanted to put a flower in her hair, but she's not fun like that."

"Oh," he said. "I'll take a flower, if you want me to."

"Only if you want to."

"I do."

She glanced at me before back at him. Giggling, she said, "You're a boy."

"I know."

"And you still want a flower?"

"Yes."

"Mmmm..." She looked at Jake then, who was glowering at the other male. "Do you want a flower?"

"I'm not a queer."

I hit him in the stomach gently. "Jake."

Thisbe looked back at Randal. "Get down on one knee."

When he did as asked, she quickly tucked one of the flowers into his hair, giggling. Then, after he stood, she said, "You're like Eli."

"Who's Eli?"

"Auden's boyfriend. And he says he's my brother. Just not yet, though." She tugged on my hand now. "Come on, Auden! We're gonna go fishin'! Not you though, Jake, 'cause you're mean."

"Fine!" He glared at me. "I didn't wanna go with you anyways."

"Whatever." I looked at Randal, expecting him to make up some excuse now that he knew I had a boyfriend. Still, he just smiled down at Thisbe.

"You ready to go catch some fish?"

"Yep!" Thisbe giggled. "Let's go play fisherman!"

* * *

Thisbe snores. It was a recent development, but she did. It annoyed the heck out of me.

Yogi and I had borrowed some poles from his father along with bait before taking Thisbe down to a pier on the other side of the lake. Most of the old guys liked fishing out in boats, so we were mostly alone except for one old man, who, like Thisbe, was passed out in his chair, his fishing pole in his lap. That was okay though, because he didn't snore. I wasn't even sure he was alive, honestly. At least he was quiet though.

"So you and this Eli? Are you serious?"

The two of us had mostly been silent up until this point. At first it was because Thisbe was talking so much, but then she fell asleep and neither of us were able to make anything work. Now apparently he had found something he wanted to discuss. It just so happened that it was the last thing I even wanted to think about.

"Very," I said simply.

"So I guess you would be impressed if I told you I graduated last year from law school and am currently working at a firm?"

"I'd call you a liar."

"You'd be wrong." He looked at me then. "I'm older than I look."

"Hmmm."

"I am," he said, giving me a toothy grin. "When I don't gel my hair and wear a suit, I'm kind of intimidating."

"Kind of?"

"Well, sure. I'm pretty much a big deal."

"Are you now?"

"I like to think so, yes."

"That explains why no one has ever heard of you."

"Bah!" He smiled over at me, not even paying attention to if his pole line bobbed or not. "I'm practically a celebrity, back home."

"Home. Where is that?"

"Kelper." He looked back out at the lake. "The little one said you guys live in Colby, right?"

"She does. I'm in college."

"Ah. And you attend?"

"Defriese," I told him, for some reason my guard not finding its way up.

"No bull?" He smiled. "Or are you a liar too?"

"I'm a liar, I'm sure, but not about this."

"Oh, she's a liar alright."

I glanced up as Eli came down the dock, quickly taking a seat on it next to us. We were hanging our feet over the side, me kicking mine back and forth, Thisbe curled up on the pier, napping. Eli sat on the other side of her.

"Hi," Randal greeted him. "I'm Yogi. Or, well, Randy if you want."

Eli didn't want though. He just glanced down at my sister before asking, "What did you guys do to her?"

"She's just hungry and sleepy. She got up rather early with your mother."

"Rather early?"

Randal coughed slightly, making me glance at him.

"Oh, Yogi, this is Eli," I said, nodding at him.

"Ah. The boyfriend," Randy said with a nod.

"The fiancé," Eli corrected, making eyes at the other guy.

"No, Eli. You're my boyfriend."

"That's debatable."

"Only to you."

Randy coughed again before smiling at me. "So, anyways, Auden, you were talking about Defriese?"

"Oh, there's really nothing else to tell you," I said, looking back at my fishing line. "I'm majoring in English."

"Really now?"

"Yeah. I want to be a writer. Both my parents are."

"Really?'

I nodded. "My dad, Robert West, is very-"

"Robert West? Like, married to Dr. Victoria West?"

"Well," I started slowly. "Uh, yeah. They were married."

"Your mom is-"

"Yes."

"Oh, God, I've never known anyone, like, famous or anything."

I glanced at Eli, but he just shrugged.

"I highly doubt that my mom is considered famous."

He ignored that. "Do you think I could meet her? Or something? Is she here?"

"Oh, no," I said, shaking my head. "My mother's not big on…camping."

"Life," Eli muttered.

"Oh. Oh, of course." Yogi laughed before looking back at the lake. "Stupid me, right. Ha."

"My mom's just not an outdoorsy person," I told him.

"And you are?"

"Shut up, Eli."

He just sighed as he stood back up before carefully lifting Thisbe into his arms. "I spent forever trying to find you, Auden. It's time for lunch. Come on."

"Eli-"

"Or not," he said as Thisbe woke up, wrapping her arms around his neck the second her eyes were open. "Whatever."

As he walked off, I looked back at Randy, smiling softly.

"I'm sorry," I told him. "It's been fun, but he's…very emotionally needy. Like a little boy. I have to go make sure he's okay."

"Oh yeah, sure." He smiled, but it was a disappointed one. "How long are you staying for? Camping, I mean?"

"Oh, no, today's my last day."

"Oh."

"Here." I handed him my cell. "Put your number in. Maybe we can talk again sometime, huh?"

"Sure!" He quickly gave me his own phone, but I just sat it to the side as I reeled in my fishing line. Once that was done, I gave him back his pole and quickly put my information into his phone. Then, with that over, I stood up.

"I'll see you around, huh?" I smiled at him before turning to walk away.

"Bye…Auden."

* * *

"Dude was a freak."

"Eli-"

"He was! Thisbe told me about how he just waltzed up to you guys, thinking that he could just-"

"He was nice, okay?" I shook my head at him from my spot on one of the sleeping bags. He was all the way on the other side of the tent, my sister and Vinny between us. For some reason, we had ended up with both kids for the night, though luckily Steven and Jake took Ralph again. There was no way that was happening.

"Oh, okay. 'cause I'm sure me hanging out with a chick and calling her cool-"

"I didn't seek him out, Eli."

"Maybe the chick did seeked me out."

"Sought. And no, trust me, she wouldn't have been doing that."

I got a glare for that.

"I'll have you know, Auden, that you're no better looking than me."

"Hn." I finally laid down, pulling my little sister closer to me. She made a noise in her sleep before settling out once more. "Whatever you say."

"Auden-"

"Eli, we're going to be alone in the truck tomorrow, the whole ride back. And then you're going to have to ride back up here, all alone, to get the guys when its time to leave. So let's just both try and stay in good moods, huh?"

He snorted, putting his back to me. "I just think it wrong of you to talk to another guy and spend alone time with him."

"My sister was freaking there."

"And?"

Groaning, I shut my eyes. "You know, Eli, you're really-"

"I'm really what? Huh? Right? Correct? Which is it? Both?"

"Just shut up and go to sleep."

"Gladly."

I tried really, really hard not to say anything else, but I just had to.

"And another thing, Eli. How dare you tell me about hanging out with guys? I mean, God, how many hot women go to competitions?"

"That's different, Auden."

"Oh, is it?"

"Yeah, it is. Just like it's different when you go to school with someone, it's different when I got to a competition with someone."

"Seems like you'd get a real good chance to score."

"Yeah, well- Score?"

I sat up, looking at him as he rolled back over to face me. "Yeah. Score."

Eli laughed then, his chest vibrating as he stared at me. "Are you serious? Score? What are we in, Aud? Eighth grade?"

"What?"

"God, baby, you are repressed. Score?" Standing, he went to the entrance of the tent and unzipped it. "Come on."

"What about the kids?"

"They'll be fine."

I was reluctant, but decided he was probably right as I crawled over to the opening, wiggling my way out of it.

"Where are we going?"

"Shhh," he whispered, taking my hand once we were both upright and leading me over to the ice chest. He took a few beers out of it before leading me away, deeper into the forest. It wasn't until we were back at that little stream that he let me go.

"Sit," he said, pointing at the ground before doing so. "Right next to me."

Doing so, I took one of the twist top beers from him. "What are we doing?"

"Celebrating."

"Celebrating what?"

"Another successful trip together." He took a sip of his first beer. "From what I know about married people and them traveling together, most do not end well."

"We're not married."

"No," he agreed. "We're not."

Smiling, I took a long swig from my own beer. "I think I love you, Eli."

"Yeah, I have that effect on women."

Laughing, I kicked off my sandals before wiggling my toes at him. "Please?"

Eli sighed as he pulled my feet into his lap. "Only because I love you."

"Only because you love me."

We were both silent for awhile as we drank beer and he massaged my feet. I was enjoying myself so much that I almost didn't notice that we were being watched. Still, I eventually did hear the breathing, as did Eli who called out for whoever was there to come out.

"I wasn't doin' nothing," Vinny complained as he came over. "Honest. I just wanted to make sure you guys was okay. You just left us all alone."

'Vinny," Eli scolded as the boy came to sit next to us. "You do not sneak out."

"I wasn't! I had to make sure Auden was okay," he said as I removed my feet from his uncle's lap. "You guys was fightin' before. How's I supposed to know if she was okay? Huh? You said that it's our job to protect the girls out here in the woods. Well, I had to protect Auden."

"Vinny, I'm the only one that needs to protect Auden."

"What if you's the one hurting her? Huh?"

"Eli will never hurt me," I told him before leaning down to kiss his head. "And you need to learn when to use was and were."

He shrunk away from me. "Ew, Auden! Eli, she kissed me!"

I just giggled while Vinny crawled closer to the stream, cupping some water in his hands before dumping it on his head.

"Don't get too wet, buddy," Eli warned.

"She's the one that kissed me."

"That's because you're so cute," I told him.

"I am _not_ cute. I am ferocious."

I frowned. "You know the word ferocious, but don't know when to use were and was?"

"I'm a very compound person, Auden," he told me as he sat back down next to me.

"I think you mean complex."

"That too."


	4. Chapter 4

Autumn Leaves

Chapter 4

"-sick to my stomach, every freaking-"

Heidi suddenly stopped talking as she saw the backdoor open. When she saw it was just me though, she sighed.

"Do you think you are?" Karen asked, staring at her.

"I don't know. I hope not. I just-"

"Not what?" I went over to the fridge to get a soda. I was once again spending another weekend at the Stocks' house. You know, because I just can't get away from them.

Anyways, Joseph wanted to do a cookout and was barbequing on the grill back there, Steven, Eli, and Jake supervising. Well, drinking, but that's the same thing in this house. Karen had spent most of the day inside with Heidi, talking and cooking while I got stuck on kid duty. What else was new?

"Oh, nothing, Auden," Karen said, waving me off. Heidi though, who was pacing in front of the counter, looked worried.

"You aren't sick, are you?" I knew I sounded childish, but I was honestly worried about Heidi. She hadn't been feeling well recently. "Heidi?"

"God, I hope so."

"What?"

She looked over at me. "This does not leave this room."

I glanced at Karen. "What?"

"Heidi, honestly, you shouldn't-"

"I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant," she told me, cutting Karen off.

I frowned. "Really?"

She sighed. "Yeah."

"Have you-"

"No." She shook her head. "I was too nervous to take a test. I don't want to. I don't want to know, really."

"Heidi," Karen sighed. "Maybe Auden doesn't want to-"

"Oh, Karen, she's not a little kid. She knows that I have s-"

Blinking, I got my soda before turning back towards the door. "Yeah, I really think the two of you can figure this one out on your own."

"Oh, Auden," Heidi sighed. "Just don't mention it, alright?"

"Have you said anything to Jack?"

She just stared at me.

"Oh, God, Heidi, really?"

Karen cleared his throat, making me look at her. "Now is not the time for blaming, Auden."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't…I'm going to go back out there with the guys. Eli wanted this soda, really."

"He needs to drink water to balance out all that beer," his mother told me before standing. She laid her hand on Heidi's shoulder. "I'll be right back, alright?"

"Oh, I'll just go out there too. Standing in here talking about it's not doing anything."

I led the other two women out of the house and over to the patio table next to the grill. Karen's husband, who was at the table, immediately stood up and gave her his seat. My boyfriend, who was also at the table, just stared at me. He had been drinking for a few hours now and wasn't in a very cooperative mood.

"Get up, Steven," his mother told him before letting Heidi have the chair he vacated. "Go get some of more lawn chairs out of the shed, huh? And Jake, are you honestly going to make your father stand?"

"It's fine, dear." Joseph laid a hand on his wife's shoulder. Eli was staring so hard at me now that I had to say something.

"What?" I asked.

He blinked before letting out a long breath. "Auden."

"What?"

He was up suddenly, moving closer to me. Joseph, though, reached a hand out while keep the other on his wife's shoulder.

"No," he said simply, using no effort at all as he pushed his son back. "Whatever it is, no. Either sit back down or go to bed. I don't care."

Eli growled, shoving his father's arm away. "Auden."

"Cut it out, Eli. Either tell me what you want or-"

It was then that crying started up. I had left the kids playing with Ralph in the yard. They had been throwing him Frisbees and tennis balls when I went into the house though the dog rarely brought them back. What could have gone wrong?

Joseph was the first to get to my sister, who was crying in the middle of the yard. Vinny, who was watching her cry, had his usual guilty, indignant look on his face.

"I didn't-"

"What's wrong?" Joseph easily lifted my younger sister into his arms regardless of the fact she was now a kindergartner, too old to be carried around like a toddler. "What'd he do?"

"I didn't do nothing!" Vinny was yelling now, getting upset as well. "It was her! She said I throw like a girl. Do I throw like a girl now? Huh, Thisbe?"

"He hit me with the Frisbee," my sister whined while Joseph carried her into the house, Heidi following. Steven, who had been getting more lawn chairs, just sighed as he went to deal with his son.

Karen shook her head at me as I sat down at the table, taking Heidi's seat. "It's always something with the two of them."

Eli, who was now sitting back in his chair, said, "Auden."

"What? What do you want?"

He looked around hastily before leaning over to me. It wouldn't have been that hard for anyone that wasn't totally gone, but Eli was and almost fell on his face, having to use the table for support.

"I'm so horny," he tried to whisper in my ear. Too bed a drunk whisper isn't really a whisper at all. The other two people at the table, Jake and his mother, both heard him. I could feel it as my cheeks heated up, my blush evident.

"Eli-"

"Mmmm. Auden."

Jake, who wasn't so sober himself, laughed loudly. "You hear that, Mom? He said-"

"Be quiet, Jake." Karen stood, shaking her head. "You need to drink more water, Eli. No, I take that back. You need to stop drinking so much. That's what you need to do."

With that, Karen headed back into the house, passing Joseph, Heidi, and Thisbe on her way in.

"Are feeling better, sweetie?" Karen asked my younger sister who just nodded, not removing the Popsicle in her mouth. "That's good."

"Bribing her into being quiet?" I asked Heidi and Joseph as the returned.

"Whatever works," Heidi sighed, taking Karen's seat now.

Joseph just patted Thisbe on the head before leaving her to go make up with Vinny. The little boy in question was still standing in the middle of the yard with his father, being lectured. It was only when Thisbe walked up that Steven cut that out.

"Why do you get a Popsicle?"

Thisbe finally took the treat out of her mouth. "'cause I'm special."

"Grandpa!" Vinny looked over at us.

"You hit her, Vinny, with the Frisbee. You don't get one."

"That's not fair! Granny!" When he looked around and saw she wasn't that though, he just gave up.

"Are you sorry?" Thisbe asked before putting her Popsicle back in her mouth.

"Yes. Can we play now?"

Thisbe just nodded before letting him lead her over to Ralph, who had yet to move from his spot on the ground. I watched them for a moment until Steven came over, setting two lawn chairs down for his father and himself.

"Where'd Mom go?" he asked. "This was her idea, after all."

"Eli said he was horny and she left."

"Jake!" I glared at him while Eli laid his head down on the table, clearly not feeling well.

"You what?" Joseph frowned. "What is wrong with you? Talking that way in front of your mother. Do you know how disgusting that is, Eli? Do you? Do you even care?"

He just groaned, closing his eyes. "I think I'mma puke."

"Come then," Steven complained, standing. "Let's go lay down then. Huh?"

Joseph just shook his head at his two oldest boys as they headed into the house. Heidi, who now had her phone out, sighed loudly.

"I'm glad I had a girl," she told no one. I rolled my eyes, glancing out at the kids to make sure they were still okay. They were. In fact, they were so okay that Thisbe was letting Vinny have some of the Popsicle now. Yay, germs.

"Burgers are done," Joseph announced a few minutes later as he stood. "And hotdogs. Vinny, Thisbe. Do you guys want your food now? Huh?"

They had long finished the Popsicle and were, as always, ready for more.

"Yes!"

"Yes, Grandpa!"

Joseph smiled as they both came running towards him. "Jake, get the paper plates out of the house. And the chips."

His son just stared at him. "Yeah, I'm gonna go with no."

Karen saved her son from getting yelled at as she came out of the house with the aforementioned items, also carrying a thing of plastic cups.

"Auden," she called over to me. "Can you get those liters of soda out of the kitchen? Please?"

"Sure," I said as Joseph pulled his wife in for a kiss. She just smiled at him before setting the stuff down on the patio table.

Going inside, I also grabbed some ketchup and mustard before returning. They hadn't waited for me to say grace, but I was mostly thankful for that. After that was through, the kids got their food first as always, each getting a warning that they had to eat most everything on their plates if they wanted to have cookies later that night.

"Grandpa," Vinny complained, looking around. "You didn't put out our table. Where are we gonna sit?"

"You get to sit with the grownups, silly," Heidi told him as she picked up her daughter and set her in her lap. "Won't you like that?"

"Y-"

"No," Vinny cut Thisbe off. "We don't like you guys to know what we talk about."

"You better not be talking about anything you can't say in front of us," Karen said, giving him a look.

"I can set you guys up a table, I suppose," Joseph sighed. "I-"

"Good. Come on, Auden!"

I frowned at him. "Come on and what?"

He glanced at me. "Ain't you gonna eat with us?"

"No."

"Fine!" He stomped over to his grandmother, waiting to be sat in her lap. "Fine."

I just rolled my eyes as Joseph handed me a plate with a burger on it. He smiled at me before asking Karen what she wanted. Steven came out, carrying the baked beans his mother had made before going back to get the potato salad.

"What's wrong with you, buddy?" he asked his youngest when he finally sat down at the table.

Vinny, still with a scowl on his face, just said, "I hate Auden!"

If this is what family is like, I'm glad I missed out on most of it when I was a kid.

* * *

"Why didn't you want Heidi to tell me?"

"What, dear?"

I frowned at what Karen called me. "Why didn't you want Heidi to tell me she was pregnant?"

We were in the house again, but it was calmer now. Thisbe and Vinny had both gone home with Heidi to be her problem while the guys were in the living room watching some sports game or something. Whatever. Except for Eli who was still passed out in his old bedroom. That, as seemed to be becoming the norm, left me alone with Karen. Not that she minded.

"Well," she began slowly before taking a long sip of her coffee, clearly stalling. We were both at the table, neither sure what to say to the other. "I just thought that it might make you uncomfortable, given the circumstances."

I blinked before looking down at my own coffee. "I wouldn't care if she was pregnant."

"I know you think that, but still. Seeing someone else have a baby, get to go through with that must be-"

"I wouldn't care," I said, bristling for some reason. "It wouldn't bother me."

"Okay," she said slowly.

"I wouldn't," I insisted.

"Aright, Auden. I believe you."

Looking off now, I said, "Besides, I didn't even want a baby. Ever. It's…better this way. Isn't it?"

Karen swallowed some more coffee, buying time. When that was out, she had to address my statement. "I think that you would have made a good mother to…Clayton if things had turned out alright."

"But they didn't. It's better that they didn't."

"I can't say that, Auden. I would have liked for them to go the other way." Her voice was taut now. "If that's how you feel though, that's how you feel. And if you don't wish to ever have another child, that's fine. It's something that you and Eli should discuss, of course, but it's no one else's business."

"We have talked," I said, still not looking at her. "Eli's just so, so childlike. He thinks that just so long as we always love each other, things will always turn out okay, that nothing can hurt us if we just hope and pray."

"Well, Joey and I pray, Auden," she said, before taking another sip of her coffee. I could tell that I was making her uncomfortable, but something in me couldn't stop. She was always so optimistic, so helpful, so…annoying. Karen annoyed me. She really did. I'm not sure why, but she does. "If it's not something you do, that's fine, I just think that you shouldn't slight Eli for it-"

"Where exactly did praying get Eli?" Drunk and sleeping it off at his parents house. "Nowhere."

"That's not fair, Auden."

"It is though."

She stood then. "I'm not going to argue with you, Auden. What you believe is what you believe. That's fine. You're not going to disrespect God in this house though, if that's what you're trying to do."

I watched her as she walked off into the living room, getting angry over this for some reason. She was the one that wanted to talk to me. Not the other way around. So what if I asked her something hard? Huh? Why is that my fault that she didn't want to answer?

I had to go through the living room even though I really didn't want to. It was the only way to get to Eli, who I found sleeping in his old bedroom. I just sighed as I went to sit on the edge of the bed, stroking his head gently.

"Mmmm."

"Eli, I want to go home."

"Mmmm."

"Eli, get up. Come on. We're going home."

"No." He rolled away from me then. "I'm sleepin', Aud."

"I know, baby. You can sleep at home, with me."

"No. You go. I'll stay." He fumbled around with one hand, looking for his keys. I knew he wouldn't have them though, that Joseph always took them from him. I mean, God, you'd think Eli would have realized this by now, as many times as he's shown up drunk to things. Shaking my head, I stood before telling him that I loved him and would see him later.

"Love you," he called after me. "Auden."

After leaving him alone, I had to go back into the living room, where Karen had taken up post in Joseph's chair. Where was Joseph though?

"That boy about drank all my beer," he complained as he came out of the kitchen with a beer for himself. "Though I guess you other boys helped him out, huh?"

"I need Eli's keys," I said before he could sit down. "Eli wants to spend the night, but I'm going to go ahead and head-"

"Oh, Auden, come on. Be serious." Karen glared at me for some reason, as if I should want to spend my weekends with a family that isn't my own. Yeah.

"I am," I told her as Joseph pulled the keys from his pocket. He was smiling at me, clearly having no idea why his wife was speaking that way to me.

"You heading back home, Auden? Real home?" Jake was suddenly animated. "Like your apartment?"

"Sure am," I told him.

"Tonight?" Karen frowned. "Auden-"

"I just don't want to be in town, with Eli, when he's drunk. I've seen my sister, so now I have no reason nor desire to be in this town."

This ticked Karen off for some reason. "Fine, Auden. Just go."

"I was."

"See, Steven, I told you," Jake was saying. "Can't leave two chicks alone too long or else they'll start fighting. Like chickens."

"What do you know about chickens? Other than being one?"

"Hey, Auden, wait up!" Jake jumped up now, almost falling on his face. Karen was still glaring after me, I knew she was, and her youngest choosing to follow me was just fuel to the fire.

"What, Jake?" I asked once we were both out of the house, on the front porch. I could see that everyone was watching us through the screen door though.

"Take you with me?"

"What?"

He frowned. "I mean, take me with you."

"You're drunk. Go away."

"No, Auden, I mean it. Take me with you."

"To Eli's?"

"No. To wherever you live."

"Screw off." I headed towards the truck now, but he followed me.

"Let me stay on your couch."

"I don't have a couch."

"No shit?"

"Jake-"

"Then let me stay on your floor. Or when we get there, tell me where Maggie lives and I'll go stay there. You know, whatever."

"Jake, I'm not taking you with me," I said as I got into the driver's side. "I'll take you to Eli's if you want, but that's as far as our adventure goes together."

"That's not-"

"Either get in or go back inside to your parents."

He quickly scrambled into the passenger's side. "Why won't you take me?"

"Why?" I frowned over at him. "Because I have no idea when I'll be going back to Colby and I do not want to be responsible for you."

"I'm not Vinny, Auden. You won't be responsible for me."

"I will in the eyes of your parents." I glanced at him. "Besides, if Eli finds out that I took off with you, he'll think that we ran away together."

"Hey, as long as the option's open-"

"Don't make me kick you out of the truck."

"Aye-aye."

We rode in silence until we reached Eli's apartment. I immediately got out, headed in.

"Jake, I'm leaving Eli's keys on the kitchen counter, alright?" I called out to him once I was sure he was in there with me. "Tell him I'm sorry, I just don't feel like staying in town. Okay?"

He just sat down on the couch, nodding. I sighed, going to do as I said before heading into Eli's room to get my stuff. It was only Friday night. It'll be good to get back home and be able to get some things done there. And if someone calls in, I might even be able to get a shift or two at work, which would be great.

"I'm gone, Jake," I called out when I walked back through the living room to find he had disappeared. Shaking my head, I decided that this wasn't my problem and headed out. It wasn't, either. So long as I kept him in Colby, he was safe, fine. Everyone knew everyone here. Or at least that's what they all keep telling me.

* * *

"Gotcha, Auden!"

"Shit!"

And that's how I found Jake. Yeah. And he tells me he's nothing like Vinny.

"Scared ya, huh?"

I had been driving the down the road when suddenly someone jumped up from my backseat in the middle of the night. Yeah, Jake scared me. I think that would have scared anyone.

"The heck is wrong with you, Jake?"

"I wanted to go," he said simply, climbing between the driver and passenger seats so that he could get in front.

"What if I had crashed? Huh?"

"There's no one on the road."

"That's not the point, idiot!"

"You're mean when you get angry."

"No, I'm mean when you act like an idiot-"

"Don't talk to me like this, Auden. I have rights."

"You do not have the freaking right to scare the crap out of me."

"It was a joke. Calm down." Buckling up, he said, "So, how long does this trip usually take?"

I just stared at him. "Are you serious right now?"

"Keep your eyes on the road, Auden. Aren't you the one that was so worried about crashing? Huh?"

"Don't make me hit you."

Reaching towards the stereo, he said, "You know, I never pegged you for a hip-hop listener."

"What did you peg me for?" I asked, frowning as he messed with my radio.

"Classical music. You know, piano and stuff. No lyrics."

"Instrumental."

"Exactly."

"Why would you think that?"

"Just…you know…you're kind of a nerd."

I blinked. "I am not a nerd."

"No, you're a nerd."

"I am not."

"I bet you were in high school."

"As compared to who? You? A burnout? I was just smart, that's all. Not a nerd."

"Bookworm then."

"You just said the word bookworm, but I'm a nerd?"

"Uh, yeah."

Groaning, I said, "Just shut up, alright?"

"So you'll let me stay?" Jake looked at me then. "You'll take me back home with you?"

I shrugged. "You're not a child. Not really. If you want to come, you can come. I don't care."

"Can I stay with you?"

This caused me some hesitation. "If you want, I suppose."

"Cool! We can be bed mates."

"Yeah, uh, no."

"Auden, you and Eli are practically married. That makes you my sister-in-law. And you know what that makes you? My sister. We can share a bed. I won't try anything. Not with my sister."

"You're not sleeping in bed with me."

"You're no fun."

"Yeah," I sighed, changing my radio back to the station I had it on before. "I know."

* * *

"Are you having sex with my brother?"

"Hello to you too."

"Are you?"

I groaned, rolling onto my side. "Eli, it's early. Why are you calling?"

"Why the heck is Jake with you?"

"How did you even find out?"

"Mom called him to find out where he was and he said he was with you. Now what the fuck is going on?"

"Calm down." I glanced at the clock. It was only seven in the morning. And on a Saturday no less. "I left early and Jake wanted to come with me. I wasn't going to let him, but he stowed away in my car."

"What? That is the dumbest-"

"Would I be telling you that if it wasn't true? Besides, Eli, if I was going to sleep with him, why would I take him back home with me?"

He paused. "I don't want him there."

"Well, I'm not driving all the way back to Colby to drop him off, so you had better come get him."

"I'm not going to get him, Auden. You're bringing him back."

"He's not a freaking child. He chose to come with me. I didn't force him. I didn't even really want him to. This is on him."

"Why did you even let him stay? You should have kicked him out of the car."

"Eli, he's your brother. If I brought Steven back with me, would you care?"

"You've never seen Steven naked."

"And I've never seen Jake naked either. Not fully."

"Yeah, but you had one of his naked body parts in your-"

"Ew, God. Shut up, Eli."

"Why did you go back home anyways?" he asked, changing the subject. "Huh? Mom said you-"

"I didn't want to be around your mother anymore."

"What happened?"

I took a deep breath before letting it out slowly. "Nothing. It…nothing."

"Did Steven say something? My dad? I swear, if-"

"Your mom."

"Mom?"

'Yeah, she- What, Jake?" I frowned as he came into the bedroom.

"I wanted you to know that I'mma need you to take me to get something to eat."

Rolling my eyes, I said, "There's food in the fridge."

"Yeah, stuff I have to make. I'm not much of a cooker, per se."

"Is that my brother?" Eli asked. "Put him on the phone."

"Eli-"

"Now."

Groaning, I held out the phone to Jake. "It's your brother. He's pissed."

"Great," Jake grumbled, coming to take the phone. Before speaking into it though, he asked, "Can you, you know, get ready to go out? And get me food?"

Ignoring him, I got out of bed before going over to my closet.

"Hello?" Jake answered. "Well, hi, Eli- Now, now, brother, is that any way to talk to me? Your baby brother? Who you swore to protect and love? Hey! Don't curse at me. Eli- No. No. I can stay here if I want."

Leaving Jake behind to argue with his older brother, I went to go take a shower. I wanted to get one in before Jake touched it. I mean, I know that there's very little chance that I'll get his germs from us using a shower at different times, but still. Ew.

"Eli's pissed," Jake told me when I walked out of the bathroom. "He said he's coming down here as soon as he can."

"Which will be?"

"Not for awhile. Clyde's making him cover for me."

"He's going to kill you when he gets here," I pointed out.

"Yeah, I know."

"Was it worth it?"

"Are we going to hook up? If not, then no. If yes, then, well… Ow! No hitting."

"Then stop making jokes."

He just rubbed his arm. "You hit like a girl anyway- No more hitting!"

* * *

"Where is he?"

"Why Eli," I began, clearly not amused. "I'm so glad you could stop by."

"Eli's here?" Jake made a mad dash from the living room to the kitchen where he hid behind the island counter.

"I don't know what the two of you thought you were doing, but fun time is over. Playing house is over. So cut the shit, Jake."

"Eli," I groaned, pulling him into my apartment. About a week and a half had passed with Eli only calling occasionally. He was still mad at Jake and I. I thought that maybe given some time he would cool off, but apparently not.

"What?"

"Can you chill out? Huh?" I frowned at him. "God. I haven't seen you in how long? And yet for some reason you're more concerned with your brother. What's up with that?"

He huffed, staring at his brother in the kitchen for a moment before back at me. "You cheated me, you know?"

"My God, do you really think that we-"

"Not cheated on me, Auden," he said, still watching me. "Cheated me."

"Out of what?"

"You left before we could have sex. Do you know it's been three weeks since I've had sex?"

"Gah!" Jake made a choking noise from the kitchen. "Color me disgusted."

"Color you red in a minute when I beat the shit out of you." Eli looked back at his brother. "Where the heck have you been sleeping anyways? Huh?"

"In bed."

I had to grab Eli's hand to keep him still. "He did sleep in the bed, Eli. Not with me though. Just when I was at school or work. In the beginning. Now he sleeps out the couch."

Eli noticed my newest piece of furniture for the first time. "Where did you get that?"

I nodded at his brother. "Jake got it for me."

The other guy nodded though he still didn't come out from behind the counter. "One of my friends was selling it real cheap. I got it for her. 'cause she's so nice and stuff. Like my sister. Hear that, Eli? Like my sister. You know who I wouldn't sleep with? Ever? Linda. You know why? She's my sister."

Eli just blinked. "Where did you get the money for this?"

"I have money. All I do is buy beer. Where do you think all my money goes?"

"Why did you buy her a couch, huh? And what friends? You have friends here? Already?"

"Dear big brother, I have friends everywhere."

Eli looked back at me now. "Are you sure that couch isn't dirty? Like with fleas or something?"

"I'm having it cleaned, Eli. I haven't even sat on it yet."

He looked at the old, blue monstracity. "How'd you get it up here, Jake?"

"Me and some of my friends brought it up. Because I love Auden. As a sister."

I sighed as Eli took a step towards me. "I didn't sleep with him. Or near him. Ever. It makes me sick to think about."

Eli just leaned down slightly, gathering me in his arms before lifting me. He had a pretty good grip under my butt, as his hands were wrapped around my middle there. He was lifting me straight up, like a power lifter or something. He had never carried me like this and I braced my hands on his shoulders, not trusting his strength.

"I want sex. Now," Eli said, staring up at me. I hit at his head with one hand, using the other to grip his shoulder.

"I'm not a dog. You can't demand it."

He grunted before looking at his brother. "Get out. You have five minutes. If you're not out in five minutes, I'll rip your balls off."

"Aye-aye," he said, saluting, though he stayed behind the counter until we were in my bedroom. Eli was still carrying me, taking very careful steps.

"You're stronger than you look," I told him.

Kicking the door closed behind him, Eli asked simply, "Did he fuck you?"

His vulgarity shocked me for a moment, so much so that I answered honestly.

"No."

"Did he?" Eli paused. "Before?"

"Never."

"It was gentle then?"

"No," I said slowly, my hair brushing his face as I stared down at him. "It was…fast, I guess. It didn't take long. It wasn't…like you are, when you're gentle. When you're slow."

He still just looked up at me. "Did you like it?"

Eli had never asked so many questions about my first time. Ever. He rarely even liked to hear about it.

"No," I told him, completely truthful. "It used to be the worst mistake of my life."

"What's your worst mistake now?"

"Ever getting pregnant."

He dropped me then, though it was rather softly. "Because…we lost her? Or-"

"I don't know anymore."

For a moment we just stood there, watching each other. Then, slowly, he went to sit down on the edge of my bed, hanging his head down.

"I always saw myself as having kids, Auden. It's just something I thought people did. I never though that there were people like you."

I turned to look at him, though I wouldn't face him full on. "People like me?"

"People that think that there's something more important than that, that kids would just get in the way. I thought everyone knew the whole point of life was to have kids."

"Is that what you think?" I looked at him finally. "That that's the only thing life is about?"

"That's what makes you a man," he told me softly. "In my family. Having kids, taking care of them."

I blinked. "That's not what life's about, Eli."

He lifted his head finally. "But isn't it?"

Walking over to him, I slowly reached out, pulled his head towards me until it was resting on my stomach. "Is that what you think then? That because I lost Clayton that you've failed? That you're not a man?"

"No," he mumbled against my stomach.

"Is that why you drink?"

"I've always drank."

"Not like this."

"Oh, what do you know?"

I just stroked the back of his head. "A lot. It might not feel like it, Eli, but we've been together for years now. Nearly four."

"I thought it was already four years."

"Is it? I think it's coming up. Right after I graduate."

"Oh."

I giggled softly, still uneasy. "We never celebrate anniversaries."

"We're not those kind of people."

"No," I agreed. "We're not."

He suddenly grasped my hips before falling backwards, pulling me with him.

"Oof."

"Yeah, doofus. You should have thought that one through," I taunted, moving to get off him. Eli wouldn't let me go though. Instead, he rolled onto his side, forcing me to do the same.

"You're a man, Eli."

"Shut up."

"You are." I poked his chest. "You're my man. What else would you be? A boy?"

He just laid there, staring at me. "Mom's pissed that you took Jake with you."

"I don't particularly care what your mother thinks."

"Don't start shit, babe."

"Don't call me babe."

He smiled finally, but it was a sad one as he reached out to stroke my face. "I'm in love with you, you know."

"Yeah," I sighed. "I know."

* * *

"Not to be annoying here or unemotional, because this is great, watching the two of you spoon and everything, but uh, are we eating dinner anytime soon? I'm kind of hungry."

I groaned as Eli slipped the pillow out from under our heads before throwing it at the open door.

"Ow, Eli! What is up with you guys and physical violence?"

"Screw off, Jake."

"I'm hungry. I was promised food."

"You were not."

I groaned, opening my eyes. "I told him that he and I would go out to dinner tonight because he got me the couch. Sorry, Jake. I didn't know your brother was coming."

"And come he did."

I shut my eyes again. "Ha ha."

Eli took the last pillow and threw it at the door again.

"Auden, he keeps throwing things at me."

"Stop throwing things," I told my boyfriend. "Just get him to go away."

"Here." Eli made sure I was completely covered under the blanket before slipping out from under them.

"Ah, man, I did not want to see that."

Eli ignored his brother as he went over to his jeans, ignoring the fact that he was stark naked. Bending down, he pulled his wallet out before going over to his brother.

"Here's a twenty. Go knock yourself out. Gorge yourself on whatever you want."

"I doubt that I can 'gorge myself' on twenty dollars." Jake glanced down. "Cold in here, is it?"

"Fuck off." Eli shoved him out the door before closing it. "Dick."

"Bigger than yours."

I rolled over to face him as Eli climbed back into bed. "Your brother's annoying."

"Yeah, I know." He poked my arm. "How'd you deal with him, huh? For this week?"

"Week and a half."

"How, Auden?"

I smiled at him, laughing slightly. "He's just like a little boy. It's just a babysitting gig, only instead of making sure not to give him too much caffeine, I have to make sure he doesn't have too much alcohol."

"Did you guys really never even sleep in the same bed?"

"Yeah, Eli. I mean God. I would never lay in bed with another guy. I'm with you."

"You are with me."

"I am."

"My girl."

"Mmmhmm."

"And you love me."

"Most definitely."

"And you're horny again and want to have sex."

"Yeah, you weren't walking me into that one, stupid."

"Well, I tried." He smiled at me then. "So, since Jake's gone out to dinner and everything…are you hungry?"

"A little." I shifted under the covers. "I don't feel like going out though."

"Then I'll make us something, huh? Anything you want."

"Whatever you make is fine." I stroked his bare chest, making sure to trace Clayton's name, forever inked there. "Elijah."

"You're just not gonna let that go, are you? Huh?"

"I bet you've never even read anything W.H. Auden wrote before."

"To be honest with you, Aud, I didn't even know that your name was his last name."

I just smiled. "You know what my dad used to tell me? What he says about Thisbe now?"

"What?"

"That if they don't know the meaning behind our names, that they're not worth our time."

Eli let out a breath, staring at me. "The way I see it, Auden, you can be as smart as you want, you can learn all you want, and you can make as much money as you want. But if you're a dick, you'll still be a dick. Plain and simple."

"Are you calling my father a dick?"

"Not directly, no." He smiled when I traced Clayton's name one more time. "You ever gonna tell me what really happened with you and Mom?"

"No."

"Alrighty then." He pushed out of bed, still naked. I watched as he went over to his jeans and pulled them back up. "I'll be making us dinner then. You can stay in bed if you'd like."

"Mmmm."

I laid around for some time, not really wanting to find out what Eli was making. The two of us combined could occasionally come up with a good meal. Mostly though, Eli lived off hotdogs and chips while I lived off salads and frozen low calorie TV dinners. You know, the real American family. We're hardcore.

"So when exactly are they coming to clean that thing?"

I just smiled at my boyfriend as I came out of the bedroom clad in my panties and his shirt only. "Don't worry about it."

He gave a sideways glance back at the couch before going back to the stove. "I'm making chicken."

"I smell. I didn't even know I had chicken."

"It was frozen. In the back of the freezer."

"Yummy."

"I poured some, uh, cream of something on top. You know, real Top Chef shit."

"Fabulous." Sauntering over to him, I leaned back against the island counter to watch him. "Happy Halloween by the way."

"Oh yeah, forgot all about that."

"Mmmhmm. I can't believe you didn't stay down there to take the kids trick-or-treating."

"Actually, I have photos," he said, pulling his phone out with one hand. "Catch."

I did so before flipping through his photos. "Wow. Vinny was a vampire, huh?"

"Dracula."

"And Thisbe's a princess."

"Yep."

"With a pink tutu."

"It's what she wanted."

"My mother would hate that."

Eli smiled back at me. "Vinny told me to tell you that he'll save you ten pieces of candy."

"Really now?"

"Yeah. He really likes you for some reason."

"Well, you know, I do have quite the affect on Stock men."

"So I'm finding out."

We took our dinner in the bedroom, neither braving the couch just yet. I didn't like eating in bed, but it was that or sitting on those stupid stools Eli brought me which wasn't happening either. So, you know, life happens.

"There aren't any Halloween parties we could go to or something? It's not that late."

I made a face at Eli as I swallowed a bite of chicken. "You know I don't party. Besides, I have class in the morning."

"Seriously? After a major holiday?"

"Halloween is hardly a major holiday."

"To some of us. Not fun ruiners. You know, like you." He reached over and poked me gently in the nose. "Auden Stock."

I wrinkled that nose. "No."

"Auden Penel-"

"Don't say it."

"I love your middle name."

"Yeah, well, that makes one of us."

We were sitting cross-legged on the bed, facing each other. We were so close that our knees were touching.

"Penelope."

"Stop it!"

"I love it though. So much. You don't even know how much I love saying that."

"It sounds dorky."

"It does not." Then he smiled at me. "And dorky?"

"Shut up. I can say dorky. Jake called me nerdy the other day."

That got an eye roll. "Let's stop talking about him for awhile, huh?"

"How about forever."

"Works for me…Pen-"

"Stop it, Joseph."

That just got a stare. "That's weird on a whole different level."

"Why? Huh? Joey?"

"Stop it. I'm going to start thinking of my mother when I see you."

"Joey," I said it all slow and seductive like. "You think that's how she says it? You know when they-"

"I will murder you."

"Oh, Eli. You gave me hell when my parents got back together."

"For good reason. Your parents are so dry and literal. I couldn't even imagine them having sex."

"Good. Keep it that way."

Then, in a high-pitch tone, he tried to attempt my mother as he said, "Robert? Perhaps if you shifted angles-"

"I'll hurt you."

"I can hurt you worse." He puffed out his bare cheat. "You know that?"

"I know you can," I agreed, not even feeling like fighting that. "But you won't."

"You're right. I won't. Ever." He held out a hand. "Give me a hand."

I did so, setting my fork down. "What are you doing?"

"I could crush your hand right now," he said, shifting our hands so that they were in handshake form. "Very easily."

"Can you?"

"Yep. I do it to Wallace and Jake all the time. As a joke. You know, squeeze their hand so hard it hurts."

"That's fun for you?"

"Yeah, well, I'm a twelve year old in a grown man's body."

"Yeah, I know."

He laughed slightly before letting go of my hand and going back to his chicken. "I'm pretty good at videogames thanks to that though."

"Yeah, I know."

"I'mma have to buy you a TV. You know, for your birthday present."

"My birthday already past, babe. It was in September. You gave me ten dollars. Remember?"

"Yeah, I know. Still. A belated gift. Or maybe a Christmas gift. Something. You just need a TV so I can play videogames over here."

"So really it's a gift for you."

"Well, yeah. Duh. Why else would I buy you something if it wasn't for me secretly for me?"

I rolled my eyes. "I have no idea."

"Just wait, Aud. Eventually, the less into each other we get, the more inappropriate gifts I get to buy you."

"Like?"

"Vibrators galore."

"Mmmm." I looked him dead in the eyes as I asked, "Joey, are you sure that this is allowed within the bible? Where exactly would I use-"

"I will hurt you. I take it back. You're so dead now."

"Now, Joey, you're the one that brought up the subject of those…nasty toys." I was speaking in my best Karen impression. It wasn't very good, but it was enough to bother Eli. "What do you call them? Perhaps I should call Janice and ask-"

"You did bring up-"

"Joseph, you know I don't like it when you take that tone."

"Auden-"

"Call me Karen."

"I will hold a pillow over your mouth when you sleep."

"Is that part of your little fantasy too, Joey?" I put a finger to my lips, trying to look alluring. "Is that what the kids do these days?"

"Okay, point taken. I won't make fun of your parents anymore. Truce?"

"Sure." I reached out to shake his hand when he held it out to me. "You know- Ow!"

He kept squeezing my hand. "You do that again and I'll do much worse."

"You're hurting me! God!"

He finally let go. "It's not that bad, Auden."

"You hurt me." I got out of bed, cradling my hand. "My God, Eli. It was a freaking joke."

"So was that! Or at least I thought."

He scrambled out of bed also, quickly crossing over to my side of the room. "Come here. Are you-"

"It hurt. You knew it would hurt. I'm not one of your stupid guy friends, alright? God. You hurt me."

"Do you need ice or-"

"No."

"Then do you want me to-"

"Just get out of my face."

He was unsure now and paused before reaching out to pat my shoulder. Then, not wanting to bother me further, he grabbed our mostly empty plates and headed out of the room, probably going to wash them. Slowly, I laid down on the bed, slipping Eli's shirt off before doing so.

When he came back into the bedroom, it was about thirty minutes later. Instead of just getting into bed, he spoke.

"I'm drinking one of those beers in the fridge. Okay? Just one. It helps me sleep." When I didn't respond, he said, "Fine then. Just know that I didn't mean to do it and I love you."

He laid down on the bed then, beer in hand. I tried to keep my eyes shut and just ignore him, but I couldn't. Rolling over, I stared at him for a moment before speaking.

"I love you too."

"Yep," Eli sighed, taking another sip of beer. "I know."

"You really did hurt my hand."

"I'm sorry." He glanced at me. "You know that though, right?"

"Yeah, I know."

"Good." He held out his beer to me. "Want some?"

"No."

"Your loss."

I just leaned against his side, shutting my eyes. "Yeah, Eli. I know."


	5. Chapter 5

Autumn Leaves

Chapter 5

"That was good, baby."

I squirmed away from Eli slightly as he kissed my cheek. "Cut it out."

He just gave me another kiss before pushing up out of the bed. Heading over to his fallen pair of jeans, he said, "We need to talk though."

"About?"

"Thanksgiving."

"Eli-"

"You're coming to my parents with me."

"No."

"Babe, it's been weeks. You and Mom are going to have to make up eventually."

"There's nothing to make up about."

It was a few weeks later and Eli had come over to my apartment. My week off for Thanksgiving Break had just started and he was going to stay with me until Tuesday when we headed to my parents. Before Karen and I fought, after Wednesday dinner with my parents, we were going to spend the rest of the week with his family.

Now though, Karen could see me in Hell.

"Auden," he complained, pulling on his jeans. "You-"

"Ew. You wear your jeans without boxers?"

He frowned over at me. "Stay on topic, babe."

"Stop calling me that."

"We're going to my parents."

"You can if you want, but I'm-"

"You're going."

"No."

"Auden," he groaned, turning to look at me. I refused to look back at him though, instead burying my head in a pillow. "I'm going to tell it to you like I told Mom. I'm not choosing between the two of you."

"What does that mean?" I mumbled against the pillowcase. He understood though, as most of our disagreements were done this way these days. It was better than yelling I suppose.

"It means exactly what I said," he told me as he moved to sit on the end of the bed, facing the door way now. "I love you, Auden, but I love her too. She's my mother.'

"I know."

"Then you know that I'm not going to stop being with you or stop talking to her. I'm not the problem in this," he told me. "The two of you are. You're going to make up with each other."

"I don't-"

"I don't care, Auden. Either you work at this or it's over. I'm done. This isn't going to turn into a Kelly situation."

"What about her, huh? Your mom-"

"I told her the same thing. If she doesn't try to work on things with you, then she can just forget about me too. As long as you both try though, then fine. That's all I'm asking for, for the two of you to work at this. She said that if you came to dinner that would be fine. She wouldn't say anything."

I laid there for a moment, thinking. Finally, I rolled over so that I could look at him. "I don't like the fact that I'm not religious being shoved in my face."

"Well, Aud, you knew that I was a Christian from the second we started dating."

"And you knew that I didn't-"

"And have I made an issue of it? No. You're the one making an issue of something you've known for years." He glanced behind him, locking eyes with me. "I'll always believe in God, my kids will be raised in the church, and my family is going to be in my life. If you can't accept that, then I don't know what we've been doing for the past couple of years other than wasting time."

"Are you a Christian when you're fucking me?"

Eli didn't blink. "Yes."

"Oh, whatever."

"I am what I am, Auden. Love it or hate it. I don't care." He shook his head at me. "I'm gong to go sit over at your parents, right? Put up with your brother that I hate and your parents that hate me, but you can't even deal with my parents, who have been nothing, but nice to you? Who you've always liked up until a month ago?"

I let out a long breath, thinking. "I guess we can go."

"Good." He smiled slightly, knowing that he had won. And he had. For now. "So…about food."

"Can you go get us something?" I rolled over again, cuddling back into my bed. "I'll stay here."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Cool. Be back soon."

Once he was gone, I did get out of bed, though it was just to quickly shower and change clothes. I still felt kind of awkward, being naked around Eli. I was still getting back into things, after losing Clayton.

"Mmmm, freshly clean," Eli said as I came out of the bathroom, him just walking into the apartment, fast food bags in his hands. "I like that."

I ignored him as I took a seat on the couch. It had gotten a good, professional cleaning, me not wanting to risk any fleas or other bugs. It was only then that I braved sitting on it.

"Let's eat over here," I told Eli, who readily sat next to me. He was much more compliant, now that I had agreed with him. "Jake keeps texting me."

"Hmmm?"

"He's been texting me, like, everyday."

"About what?"

"Just stupid stuff."

"Do you respond?"

"Sometimes," I said as he handed me a burger. "Not all the time though. He's really annoying."

"I'll tell him to fuck off." He elbowed me gently. 'You can too, you know? Tell him to fuck off."

"That's get me and your mom back on good terms."

Eli made a noise in the back of his throat before looking around. "Man, babe. I hate this, you know?"

"What?"

"You not having a TV. It's so boring around here. I mean, God, it's like you actually want us to spend, you know, real time with each other or something. Who does that these days? It's deplorable."

I blinked. "Deplorable?"

"It means-"

"Oh, no, I know what it means." I made a face at him. "I just was in shock that you don't normally use such…complex words."

"Ah. Well, I'm improving my vocabulary." Eli smiled at me. "I gotta little app on my phone that gives me a word of the day and I have to work it into a few conversations here or there."

"Wow."

"Well, I just don't want to be your, you know, eye candy or whatever. Wanna be smart too."

That got another blink. "You've never been my eye candy."

"That was a deplorable statement."

"If this keeps up, I don't think we can spend Thanksgiving Break together."

"Thank God. I want nothing to do with Dr. Victoria West."

I just sighed, shifting to lean against him. "You annoy me.'

Eli just grinned. "Yeah, I know."

* * *

"God, I haven't been at your parents house since…" Eli just shook his head as we headed up to the door. "God."

"Well, it'll only be for the night. Then we get to go spend the rest of the tim eiwth your parents."

"Yay."

I gave him a look, hiking my bag over my shoulder. The days had passed quickly and now here we were, at my parents house. Sigh.

"Just com on. I haven't seen my mother since the summer. And I haven't seen Hollis since…I don't even know."

"Welp, now's as good a time as any, eh?" Eli gave me a crooked grin as we made it up to the door.

As he was reaching out to ring the doorbell though, the door opened to reveal my father standing there. Not to mention my little sister, who was standing in front of him, bouncing up and down with excitement.

"Auden! Eli! You came to eat dinner with us!"

"Hi, Isby," I said as Eli dropped his bag to pick her up. "I didn't know you'd be here."

"It's Thanksgiving, Auden."

"That's tomorrow," Eli told her as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She was beginning to get too big to be picked up, but Eli and his father seemed to ignore that when it came to Vinny and Thisbe. 'Silly."

She kissed his cheek as he stepped into the house. "I missed you."

"I missed you too."

Rolling my eyes, I kicked Eli's bag into the house before stepping in as well. My father smiled at me, but didn't hug me. That was fine though as I just looked passed him, taking in the house.

It was mostly the same, some artwork on the walls changing and I could see new living room furniture in there, but it was mostly the same. The only real difference was that the floors were littered with toys making it obvious that Thisbe had been here a few days. I was slightly shocked by this, as my mother was very into making Hollis clean up all his toys when we were kids, not liking the house to look junky. Or so she said. I think she really just didn't want anyone to know that kids actually lived there.

That rule was thrown to the wind now though, a distant memory. My father didn't even blink an eye as he had to step over a toy train on the ground as he headed towards the kitchen.

"Victoria, the kids are here."

Eli made a face, glancing into the kitchen before back at me. Before he could say anything though, Thisbe spoke.

"Eli, wanna see my room?"

It was my turn to make a face. "You have a room?"

She nodded, patting Eli's head. "Go! It's upstairs."

He headed off, clearly not wanting to go see my mother. Before, I hadn't wanted to really see her either, but now, knowing Thisbe had her own freaking room, I wanted to go find out what was up.

"Auden."

I was pulled into one of my mother's bone crushing hugs the second I stepped into the kitchen. It felt never-ending, but eventually she did let me go. Not much had changed for my mother in the recent months. She was smiling though, which was a first in a long time.

"Hi," I said, forcing one back at her. "Uh, Eli went to look at Thisbe's room…?"

"Oh. That." She looked to my father who was getting himself a glass of water. "Robert thought she could use the extra room."

"What extra room?"

"The one that we used for your father's stuff before." She glanced at him, but he still wouldn't pay attention to us. "Your old room."

I blinked. "So…you got rid of my room to make a storage room only to make it Thisbe's room while Hollis' room is still fine?"

"Oh, Auden." She batted at my shoulder as if I was playing around. "You're never here. Hollis and your sister are. It only makes sense, after all."

Dad cleared his throat finally, coming over to us. "Speaking of your brother, Auden, he's here. He just went out for a few hours. He had some things to take care of, he said. He'll be back for dinner. And of course, he'll be here for this mock Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow."

"I was never a fan of Thanksgiving," my mother told me, as if this should be shocking news. Honestly, it was more shocking that she now was a fan. Dad just kept sipping his water, watching me, waiting for something. I was starting to get creeped out when Eli and my sister finally showed up.

"Auden," Thisbe complained as she stomped into the room. "How come you didn't come to see my room?"

"I had to come see my Mom, Thisbe," I told her as she came to hug me.

Patting her head as she held onto me, I glanced at my boyfriend. He wasn't looking at either of my parents, instead focusing on the snow outside. It wasn't snowing much, hardly enough to stick, but it had interested him the whole drive down.

"Ms. Vicky said that we could sleep in the living room, Auden," my younger sister told me, rubbing her head into my side. "Like a fort! And maybe Hollis will play too, huh? Eli said he would."

I just ran my hand down her head again, sighing. Just being back in my parents house had drained my energy. I always missed my mother and father when I was away from them, but the second we were within talking distance of each other, I wasn't nothing more than to run away and hide.

When no one said anything for a moment, even Thisbe began to feel the awkwardness and disentangled herself from me.

"Come on, Eli," she said, moving to grasp his hand now. "Let's go play."

"Hn,' Mom sighed after the two of them left the room. "He gets along well with your sister."

"He always has," Dad responded, taking another long sip of water. Then, after a quick pat on the shoulder, he headed out of the room, calling over his shoulder that he would be up in his study, working.

"So, Auden," Mom said, going back over to the island counter in the kitchen where a glass of wine sat, no doubt belonging to her. "How has school being going?"

'It's been fine," I told her, following. "How's work?"

"Oh, the students this year," she griped mildly as she picked up her wineglass. "And your father's been as intolerable as ever."

"What's been wrong with him?"

"The usual." She shook her head slightly. "And then that woman called to bring your sister over."

"Heidi?"

She nodded. "She wanted to go out of town with some boyfriend or something. You and Eli are brining Thisbe back with you, to stay with the Stocks when you go back down there. I suggested that she could stay here, as she is Robert's child, but Heidi insisted that Thisbe would want to be with that boy."

"What boy?"

"Eli's younger…whatever. The one that she's always with."

"Vinny."

"Yes, him."

"Where is he right now?"

"I don't know. I didn't ask." Or didn't care, I'm sure. "Thisbe likes it over here though, I assume."

"What does she do while Dad's working?"

She gave me a once over. "Your father will play with her occasionally and when he won't, Hollis is there. And if there's neither of them, I have found myself-"

"Mom."

"I played with you as a child, Auden," she defended, grabbing the bottle of wine to pour herself some more. "You don't have to act so-"

"When?"

"Hmmm?"

"Name one time that we ever played."

"Well," she began, "I don't mean play as in something like Hollis would do with his toys. But I would read to you."

"Reading to someone is playing. Is that what you do for Thisbe?"

"No, but-"

"What happened to you?"

"Excuse me?"

I just stared at her for a moment before shaking my head. "N-Nothing. I should go, uh, check on Eli and Thisbe, making sure they're not breaking anything or something."

Leaving the kitchen, I headed off to find my sister and boyfriend. It wasn't hard. They were being so loud that I just had to follow the sound of their voices.

"You guys are not supposed to be in here," I hissed when I found them in my mother's study, Thisbe using her desk to roll Hot Wheels off. "Thisbe-"

"Ms. Vicky lets me play here," she said as Eli pushed one of his own off, watching it. "She says that I can play wherever I want, just so long as I leave Daddy alone when he's in his room. Me and her play in here with Barbies and stuffed animals too."

Barbies? I had to go lie down.

After telling them both to be mindful of their surroundings and not to leave a mess, I immediately headed to my room…only to be reminded that there was no such thing. So instead, I went to my sister's room.

Now, if I had given up complete hope n my mother, I would have expected pink walls with girly toys all round. Of course, she hadn't lost herself that much. My room then storage room now housed a bed, fitted with some cartoon character sheets. The walls were no longer the standard white, but rather red, Thisbe's favorite color. Or her current favorite color. Then she had a freaking TV, something I never got as a child and still don't have now.

Not that I'm jealous or anything.

"This was Vicky's idea."

I froze as my father came into the room behind me, his voice chilling me for a moment or two. He just patted me on the shoulder as he went over to my sister's dresser, staring at the picture frames there.

"These though? These pictures? All your brother. He's a narcissist, I fear."

"Yeah, I know," I said making Dad smile slightly and look over at me. "Why did Mom do this?"

"Hmmm?"

"Change this room."

"Auden," he said slowly, matching my gaze.

"I mean, Thisbe's hardly even here."

"She's my daughter, Auden," he said, his smile disappearing. "It's only natural that she would have a room in my house."

"That too."

"What?"

"What's up with you and Mom? I mean, God, living together? Like you're freaking teenagers."

"You-"

"I mean God, Dad, who does that? Who gets divorced, has another kid with someone else, and then gets the hell back together? And the two of you don't even like each other!"

"You will not talk to me that way, Auden," he said, advancing on me now.

I just looked off, not wanting to admit to myself that I was honestly so upset by what was going on. I was though, upset. I mean, God, it's not like this should come as such a shock. Thisbe was my half-sister, yes, and we shared a father. Of course she'd have a room in his home. And besides, it's not like I don't love my sister. Because I do. More than anything. But still, this just felt like betrayal. Like I was not only betrayed by my father, but also my mother. ...And myself. How childish is it to be jealous of Isby? What has she ever done to wrong me?

"Now, I know that you have to be…jealous that-"

"Oh, God, Dad, it's not-"

"But she's my daughter too, Auden. And she's a child. You're an adult. I never expected you to act his way."

And once again, the point of everything was lost on my father.

Turning from him, I moved to exit the room and head back to my mother's study, wanting nothing to do with either of my parents anymore. I was banking on convincing Eli that we should just go ahead and head on down to Colby, that I had gotten and seen everything I needed to here. When I turned to go down the hallway though, I ran into someone.

"Auden! Here you are," Hollis said, using our proximity to wrap his arms around me. "Mom said you were upstairs somewhere."

I couldn't even bring myself to smile, instead feeling slightly awkward around my brother. We hadn't spoken since right after I had lost Clayton. That felt like eons ago now.

"No hugging, huh?" he asked when I didn't hug him back. I was just stiff in his arms though, still slightly in shock about seeing him after so long. When he let me go, he said, "Don't tell me you're still mad at me."

I was still just stared up at him, studying his face. I don't know why I'm always so amazed at seeing my brother after being with out him for so long. I mean, he's always gone. Ever since he graduated high school, he's been everywhere. Still, just being around him again, having him home, in _our_ home, made me feel like a little kid again. Even after all the horrible things he had done to me, he was still my big brother and I loved him dearly.

"Hollis!"

Thisbe came bounding out of Mom's office, Eli walking slowly behind her. She just ran over to us, wrapping her arms tightly around our brother.

"See, Auden? Hollis is here and you're here and I'm here and Eli's here." She was clearly ecstatic about this, giggling loudly. "Now I get my brothers and my sister and we get to all be happy!"

Hollis frowned at her making brother plural while Eli just looked off, shaking his head slightly. Dad though, who was coming out of the her room, smirked slightly as he turned before walking passed us, no doubt heading back downstairs to his study.

"I missed you," Thisbe told our brother. "Where'd you go?"

"Just out. You saw me a few hours ago, Thisbe."

"I know." She smiled up at him before looking at me. "Auden and Eli came for Thanksgiving. Eli was playing with me! You wanna play?"

"Maybe later, huh?" He patted her head, his eyes still on me. "Auden and I need to talk."

Thisbe made a noise as she moved away from him and back over to Eli. She and our brother spent very little time together and though that made her want time with him all the more, he usually acted indifferent to her wants and needs. He loved her and he always brought her toys when he saw her, but that was rare and he never wanted to spend any real time with her.

"Let's go finish playin', Eli," she said, hugging him quickly, probably not wanting him to feel left out. "Let's go play cars in the kitchen. We can race 'em. Maybe Ms. Vicky will play too."

"Maybe."

"She's good at playing."

"I'm sure."

Eli and I shared a look before he allowed my half-sister to lead him off. Then it was just my brother and I.

"You wanna go to my room?" Hollis walked around me before leading me over there. "Just sit down. I wanna talk some, alright?"

I just shook my head as I went in there with him, immediately taking a seat on the bed. "Where's your girlfriend?"

"Who?"

"Mom said you were bringing-"

"Oh, that. Yeah, no, that's over." He smiled at me, tossing his hair back. His was long again, like when we were kids. "So how have you been?"

"Fine," I said, guarded. "Why?"

"You are my little sister, Auden," he said as he slowly walked towards me before taking a seat also. "I worry about you is all. After everything that happened-"

"Everything that happened happed almost a year ago. Not to mention, it had nothing to do with you, alright?"

He just stared at me. "Alright."

"You have called me in how long? And I'm just supposed to-"

"You haven't called me either, Auden. You told me, back in January, to leave you alone. So I've left you alone, like you asked." He snorted, looking off. "Not to mention, I never did anything to you to begin with, back then. You just act like I'm some kind of horrible brother. I mean, God, haven't we always gotten along? What happened?"

"Are you serious right now? What happened?" It was my turn to snort and look off. "You acted like a jerk the whole time I was pregnant, acted like it was a good thing that I lost-"

"I never said-"

"You acted like it! You, Mom, Dad. You guys were just glad that I was tied down to Eli anymore."

"Auden-"

"You were. And then, when I freaking leave, none of you come after me? Not one of you ever thing-"

"You told us to leave you alone. We were doing what you wanted."

"Just because it's what I say doesn't mean its what I want." I stood up then. "Oh, and hitting my boyfriend? That didn't exactly win you any points."

"He-"

"I don't care what he did, Hollis. He's _mine_. So leave him the fuck alone, alright?"

With that, I left Hollis' eternal room, knowing that it wouldn't matter how many more kids Dad had with other women. They would all be cramped into that one, tiny room while King Hollis forever had his own room. Even when he's fifty, I'm sure it'll be there. Because he's the favorite and he's always going to be. I mean, God, why do I even try anymore?

"Hey," Eli said, standing as I made it into the kitchen. "Wha-"

I cut him off, by pulling him down into a kiss. It wasn't long, but served its purpose. When I pulled away, he was frowning.

"What's wrong?"

"I just…hate it here."

"Ah." He kissed me this time, though it was just a peck. "Have no fear, you're not alone."

"Can we just go?" I stared up at him, knowing that he too would want this. "Please, Eli? Let's just go to Colby early."

"Auden," he said slowly, frowning. "We'd have to drive right back up here to get Thisbe tomorrow."

"We can take her today." I looked to my younger sister. "Huh? You wanna go home? With us?"

Thisbe was still down on her knees, rolling Hot Wheels around. She just stared at me, her eyes big.

"No," she said, shaking her head. "I wanna stay here and have Thanksgiving with you and Eli and Hollis and Daddy and Ms. Vicky."

"Thisbe-"

"No, Auden!" She picked up a toy and threw it at me. "No. I wanna stay here! You leave. I wanna stay with my daddy and brothers. Eli and I wanna eat here. Huh, Eli?"

"Calm down," he said, glancing back at her. "And do not throw things at your sister, huh?"

She just crossed her arms still glaring heavily at me. When he looked back at me, Eli just pulled me into a hug.

"What happened?" he whispered in my ear. "Huh?"

"I don't know. I just thought… Am I as big of a jerk as the rest of them? Huh?"

My head got a kiss. "Shhh. We'll talk later, huh? Alone?"

I nodded slightly, looking off. "Yeah, that's fine."

He gave me another kiss before looking at my sister. "Can Auden play cars with us, Thisbe?"

"No!"

"Thisbe, that's not very nice," Eli scolded gently. "Auden's our friend."

She still glared at me. "Fine, Auden. You can play. Only 'cause Eli wants you to though."

"Thank you," I sighed, moving to get on the ground with them. Eli smiled, taking his seat on the ground once more. "I'm sorry that I made you upset, Isby."

She made a noise, thinking. Finally, she said, "It's okay, I guess. I'm sorry I threw that car at you."

"It's alright. Just don't do it again, huh?'

If only things with the rest of my family were that easy to fix.

* * *

"Can't wait until tomorrow," Hollis told everyone at the table. "When we can a real Thanksgiving dinner."

"I like mac'n'cheese," Thisbe told him, continuing to eat hers. There was also steak on her plate, but she had been ignoring it, along with her baked potato. "Can I have yours, Auden?"

"Only if you eat more of your potatoes."

She grumbled under her breath, but did as asked.

"You know, Thisbe, Mom makes very good turkey," Hollis told her. Eli glanced up at that before shaking his head and going back to texting on his phone. Usually I would yell at him for something like this, but right now, I didn't want to deal with my parents either.

"I like ham," Thisbe told him. "Ms. Karen's gonna make Vinny and me ham. We love ham."

"Robert," Mom said, frowning at him. "You said that she liked turkey."

"Ham, turkey, who cares?" He grinned at Thisbe. "You're just happy to be here, huh?"

"Mmmm…can I have your mac'n'cheese now, Auden?"

"Sure," I said, leaning over to scrape the food off onto her plate. "There."

"I can make more of that," my mother said, suddenly self-concious. "For dinner tomorrow. If you want, Thisbe."

"Yes." She smiled at my mother. "Ms. Karen's gonna make some too, she said, for Vinny and me."

My mother just stared at her for a second before taking a sip out of her wine cup. When she put it down, she said, "You must really like Karen."

"I do. And Mr. Joseph." Thisbe started eating her macaroni again. "They're Eli's mom and dad, but they like me better."

"Hey," he halfheartedly complained, still texting.

"They do," she told everyone, nodding her head.

"I don't think I rather like that guy," Hollis said. "Joseph."

That got Eli to look up. "I don't think anyone asked you."

"Now, now, boys," my father said, reaching for his wine glass as well. "None of that in this house, alright?"

My mother just took another long sip of wine. After setting her glass down, she said, "Well, Thisbe, I think you have just as much fun over here, huh?"

She shook her head. "No. I like Ms. Karen and Mr. Joseph better."

"Thisbe," I hissed, frowning at her. She just looked at me though, not understanding what she had done wrong. After all, we always told her to be honest. She loved Eli's parents. It was Dad's own fault though, as he never saw her.

"What?" She looked at Eli and smiled. He smiled back at her, probably prideful that his parents won out.

"You don't say things like that," I told her.

"No, Auden, she's probably right. We haven't been much fun, have we, Thisbe?" Mom smiled at her, a creepy smile. Thisbe just thought she was being nice though. "Maybe next time you come down, we can do something fun, huh?"

"Yeah."

"What do you like to do, Thisbe?"

"Mmmm…I like to play hide and seek," she said. "Mr. Joseph plays it with Jake, Vinny, and me. We have lots of fun. And tag. And water guns."

"Well…we could play hide and seek," Mom said slowly, looking around the table.

"Victoria-"

"Robert, if she never has any fun, do you think she'll ever want to come back here?"

He let out a long sigh. "Thisbe, wouldn't you much rather, I don't know, read? You like that, don't you?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "Reading's boring. I wanna play."

"Maybe we can play before bed, huh?" Hollis sent a smile around the table, trying to ease any tensions. "We can be just as much fun as the Stocks, Thisbe."

She didn't seem convinced, but just nodded. "I just don't wanna read."

"That's fine, sweetheart," Mom told her. "We won't."

"Victoria-"

"Honestly, Robert, would you be quiet?"

With that, he stood up, tossing his fork down. I had a flashback to all the nights that this very thing happened, over and over again. There would be a fight later. I knew there would be.

Hollis left not soon after Dad. Eli was next, but he just went to put his plate in the kitchen before going out the backdoor to watch the snow still coming down. Then it was just my mother, me, and Thisbe.

"They're so childish," my mother told me, pouring herself another glass of wine. "Your father and brother. Your boyfriend too, I'm sure, Eli."

"Eli's my brother," Thisbe told her confidentially. "He said so."

"Not yet," Mom told her. "In best case scenario, not ever."

"I love Eli," my half-sister told her. "He's the best."

"Is he?"

She nodded. "He's the best brother ever."

That got my mother to frown again. "Hollis is a good brother too though, right? He does a lot for you, yes?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "He's weird. I like him, but he's weird."

Out of all the things my sister had told my mother that night, I think that was the one that got to her the most. The fact that someone didn't find Hollis, her golden child, the prodigy son, the most interesting thing in the world crushed her.

Is it wrong that I felt a small victory in that?

* * *

"Ready or not, here I come!"

Hearing my brother call out such a familiar phrase made me smile in the dark. I was hidden away in Thisbe's closet, sitting on the ground with my knees tucked to my chest. All of my stuff was gone. I was, after all, the forgotten child. Thisbe didn't have many clothes over here though, so I was out in the open if anyone checked in here.

I held my breath as suddenly I heard the bedroom door open. Not a moment later, the closet door was flung open.

"God, Auden, you scared me," my mother complained as she came into the closet.

"I was hiding here first," I told her.

"Well, I have nowhere else to go."

"In this house?"

She waved me off, slightly unstable on her feet. The wine was setting in. "We just have to play until she gets tired. Then she'll go to bed and we can be done with this playing business until the morning."

"Mom," I sighed softly as she stood in the opposite corner of the closet. "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"This." I gestured to the immediate area around us. "Why are you being so…nice to her?"

"Auden," she scolded softly, not wanting to alert anyone to our location. "Thisbe is your father's daughter."

"And you're his ex-wife. Why are we even pretending that this is going to work out?"

She just stared down at me for a moment. "Why do you act this way, Auden? Huh? You act like your childhood was horrid."

"I never said that," I told her. "I just…Thisbe's not your daughter. And God, Heidi told me, you know."

"Told you what?"

"How Dad didn't even want Thisbe to come here. You did. He told Heidi that she could just leave her with Karen and Joseph, but you insisted that he take her. Why?"

"I don't know," Mom sighed, looking off. "Thisbe is his daughter. I just think she should feel welcome here. This is her home too."

"But it's not," I told her. "Dad wants nothing to do with her. Not really. He hardly even pays his child support. You know that? Heidi's basically doing it all on her own."

Her eyes found mine again. "You really should learn what's your business and what isn't."

"This I my business though, Mom. Thisbe's my sister."

"And he is your father."

"Yeah, and I know how he acts. Out of sight, out of mind." I pushed up then, the close feeling a little too tight. "You can delude yourself if you want, but I know. He just creates a new life and moves on."

"Auden, you can't-"

"She likes my boyfriend's father more than her own. Do you know how twisted that is?" I kept going out of the room, not even caring as I walked passed Hollis in the room.

"You didn't make it to base, Auden. I caught you. Now-"

"I don't care," I told him, heading down the stairs. "Eli! I know you're in the stupid hall closet. Come here. Now."

"This isn't how you play, Auden," Hollis yelled after me.

"Go to Hell."

"Why are you so dramatic these days?"

I ignored him as I opened the hall closet to find my boyfriend in there, texting still. "I quit."

"Quit what?" Eli glanced up quickly from his phone. "The game?"

"Yeah."

"Did anyone find Thisbe?"

I just shrugged. "I just want to go to bed so I can wake up, eat this stupid dinner, and then go home."

"Home?"

"To Colby."

He smiled at that. "Yeah. Home."

* * *

"I don't get why you acted so funny today."

"I just hate this house, that's all. I hate the way they all act."

"How do they act?"

"You know how they act."

"They've always been that way though. Why is it suddenly such an issue?"

Eli and I were in my parent's living room, me on one end of the couch with my sister on the other while he was sleeping on the floor, in an old sleeping bag.

"I don't know. I just…it gets old."

"What does?"

I looked down at the other end of the couch, finding that my sister was for sure asleep.

"It was one thing, you know, when they liked Hollis more growing up. He was the boy and the first born. Not to mention, my mom's not exactly a liar. She's flat out told me before that I was an accident, that I was really more in the way than anything."

"Auden-"

"But then she has to go and give Thisbe my room, try to do all these things with Thisbe that she never did with me. I was expected to sit down and be quiet my whole life, to only ever focus on academic things. Hollis was draining, they always said, so they were glad that I was tame. Here comes Thisbe though, proving that it was just me. And she's not even my mother's child."

Eli let out a long breath. "You can't honestly think that-"

"I know though, Eli," I told him. "I was supposed to be something. Now I'm nothing. She just acts like everything I do is a freaking disappointment. Like Hollis some great person. He's a freaking bum, but you couldn't tell Mom that. I'm the one that went to college. I'm the one graduating. Me. Yet I'm worthless. And then Dad's never cared what I did because I'm not the boy. It's freaking bull. Every time I'm around them these days I realize how much I dislike them."

Eli was silent for a moment. "It'll be okay, babe. We'll eat dinner tomorrow, huh, and leave right after. Then we can get home and enjoy the last few days of break."

"Yeah."

"I love you, Auden."

"I love you too."

We were both quiet for some time, neither able to fall asleep, but neither having anything more to say. What more could there to be to say?

I don't know about Eli, but I didn't sleep at all that night. I just laid there until around six in the morning when I heard my father com down the stairs. He just made coffee before heading off into his office, never say a word to anyone. Once I knew that he was up though, I just quickly got up as well, going to get my own cup of coffee. Once that was done with though, I headed upstairs to take a shower.

Even after that, the only one up and in the kitchen was Hollis. We both ignored each other though, knowing that words would only lead to fighting. Eli was the next up and he immediately set to work on making breakfast, Thisbe quickly getting up to help him.

"Where's your mother?" Dad asked as he came into the kitchen to find us eating. "And ooh, thanks for the eggs, kids. Where's Hollis though?"

"Right here," Hollis called out as he came back into the kitchen. Thisbe, Eli, and I were at the kitchen table already, eating. "I went to check on Mom. She's real upset though."

Dad, thinking it was with him, just made a noise as he went to get some eggs and sausage. Hollis was glaring at me.

"What'd you do to her, Auden?"

"What are you talking about?" I hardly glanced at him.

"She's freaking crying because you called her a shit parent."

"Language," Dad said halfheartedly as he got another cup of coffee as well. "Your sister is in the room."

"I did not say-"

"Whatever, Auden. If you didn't want to come down here, that's all you had to say." Hollis went over to the fridge, pulling out a carton of orange juice. "None of us are going to beg you to love us. You wanna go off and live and Colby with your stupid boyfriend? Fine. Just don't act like we drove you away. You chose to go away."

"Knock it off," Dad said again, still hardly paying attention to us.

"Oh, get a job, Hollis."

"Why don't you? You waste just as much of their money as I do."

"Waste? I'm going to college. You're just going around sleeping with whatever whore wants to call you their boyfriend that week."

"I said to knock it off, alright?" Dad finally looked at both of us in turn. "This fighting is getting on my nerves. Now, if the two of you can behave yourselves for once? Huh?"

With that, he headed back off into his office like always. His duty as a parent was done. Then again, in his mind, it had been done since the day I was born.

"You made her cry, Auden. You know that?" Hollis got right back to the task at hand the second Dad was gone. "Huh? Feel good? Get all your anger out at us?"

"I didn't say anything to her, alright? God."

"You said something."

"I did not. I said nothing."

"Then go apologize."

"For nothing? Go away, Hollis."

He shook his head at me before taking the carton of juice with him out of the kitchen. "I'm starting to hate you just as much as you hate me."

I glared at his back as he left, remembering for the first time that Eli and Thisbe were at the table as well.

"Why are you guys fighting?" Thisbe frowned at me. "Auden, I thought you said we'd eat dinner? All of us? Together."

"We will," Eli assured her, glancing at me. "Huh, Auden?"

I nodded, but didn't speak as I slid my plate of food over to my boyfriend.

Since when did everything fall on my shoulders?

* * *

Needless to say, dinner was awkward as hell. My mother was silent the whole time, only speaking when Thisbe asked her something. My sister didn't seem to pick up on the down vibe in the room, instead talking incessantly about what she and Vinny would do when they both got back home. He was apparently with his mother's family and would be back on Thursday.

"Vinny and I like playing dinosaurs," Thisbe told us all, eating her macaroni and cheese. "His granny bought us all kinds of dinosaur toys."

Eli sighed slightly, picking at his food. "You guys are good at playing, I suppose."

That honestly was the most riveting moment of the night. The day had been spent with everyone avoiding each other. Now, here we were, stuck at a table together for no real reason other than it was a stupid holiday that really had no value anymore.

After dinner, I stuck around to help clean up the kitchen. None of the guys did of course, Hollis going out for the night and my father heading back to his office. Eli for his part did keep Thisbe distracted, so that was a plus, but by the same token, it left Mom and I alone.

"Mom," I tried, not soon after we were left in the kitchen, washing dishes.

"What?"

That was the first word she had spoken to me all day. It was kind of sad, really.

"Hollis said that you were…upset with something that I said."

"Is that what he told you?" She kept doing what she was doing, never once turning around.

"Well, yeah. He said that you thought I said that you were a…bad parent or something."

"You said, Auden, that we favored your brother."

I blinked. "When did you-"

"I overheard you and your boyfriend last night."

"You what?"

"You were in the living room, Auden. It wasn't hard." She finally looked at me. "And we do not favor Hollis in anyway."

"No, no, wait. You were eavesdropping on me?"

"I think that you're missing the point, Auden. You said-"

"No, I think that you're missing the point."

"No, I am not. You are in my house. Anything you say is my business." She let out a huff. It was at moments like these, when she was angry, that I realized just how much she had aged and how quickly. That divorce had taken a lot out of her. "In what way have I ever favored your brother over you?"

I just stared at her. "Is this a serious question?"

"Oh, Auden, you always blow things out of proportion."

"Fine," I said, turning back to the dishes. "Then let's not talk anymore about it, since it's not important."

"I didn't say that. Your feelings are important, Auden."

I just shook my head. "Let's not talk about-"

"What is it that you want me to do now, Auden? Huh? Fine, I'll admit that I made mistakes when you were growing up. But what do you want me to do about it? What would you like?"

"I don't want anything from you. God, is that what you think this is about? Because it's not. I don't need anything." I sent her a sharp look. "I don't want anything."

"Fine. But this self-pity crap? You can keep it at home next time you come down."

"Have fun waiting for that visit," I grumbled under my breath.

It was then that Eli and Thisbe came back into the house. He took one look at us before taking her up to her room to find what she wanted to take with her back home. We'd be leaving in an hour after all.

My mother and I work silently, neither wanting to speak to the other. Was there even a question in anyone's mind who the favorite was? Who it is? Who it always will be? I don't know why it bothers me at this point. I really don't.

When it was finally time to leave, my brother wasn't even around. Which was fine. Thisbe didn't even notice.

"Bye," she said, hugging my father. "I love you."

He just patted her on the head. "You behave until your mother gets back, alright?"

She nodded before moving to hug my mother, who readily embarrassed her. "Goodbye, Ms. Vicky."

"Goodbye," she said, holding her tightly for a moment. When she let her go, she said, "I'll see you next time you visit. Okay?"

Thisbe nodded before rushing over to Eli, who was putting the bags in the car, wanting to help him. Then it was just me and my parents standing on the porch.

"Well, Auden, call us when you get home, okay?" Dad gave me an awkward shoulder pat before calling out to Eli to be careful on the roads, in case of black ice. Eli gave him a curt wave back, though I'm sure he would have rather it'd been the finger.

"Are you not going to even hug me then?" My mother frowned at me. "Honestly, Auden, this is getting childish."

I was stiff, but allowed her to hug me. It wasn't as long as her normal goodbye hugs were, but it served its purpose, putting her at ease that we weren't fighting as badly as we were. We were just arguing now in her mind, I'm sure.

"We'll talk later, Auden," she told me. "A serious talk. Alright?"

"Alright," I mumbled, looking off before heading over to the car, calling out a even goodbye over my shoulder. She just stood out there on the porch, watching us leave.

"I am so glad to be heading back home," I told Eli the second we were in the car, heading down the road. Thisbe was all snuggled up in the back seat with some stuffed animals, no doubt going to be out soon.

"Yeah," Eli agreed, reaching over to lay his hand on my knee. Giving a slight squeeze, he added, "Me too."

* * *

**This chapter was supposed to be half dealing with Auden's family and then the other half dealing with the Stocks, but the more a wrote, the more it just because about Auden's side. Which is fine. I think I focus too much on Karen and Joseph. I just like them more than Robert and Victoria, I guess. **


	6. Chapter 6

Autumn Leaves

Chapter 6

"Uncle Eli!"

He groaned as he lifted the girl into his arms. "God, I haven't seen you in forever. Have you missed me?"

Erica giggled, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Yes."

Thisbe stepped around my boyfriend, walking into the Stock house like she belonged there. Then again, she probably did. More so than me at least. "Where's Vinny?"

"He and the other kids won't be here until around noon, sweetie," Karen told her as I stepped into the house as well. "Their mother's bringing them."

"Great," Steven mumbled. He was sitting on the couch, arms crossed. His father was in there too, seated in his chair, watching the Thanksgiving Day Parade on television.

"Hello, Auden," he said evenly, though his smile betrayed him. I'm sure Karen told him he was supposed to be cold towards me, but there was very little chance of that happening. "You have a good dinner with your family?"

I hesitated long enough for Thisbe to decide she should speak for me.

"No. Auden and her mommy fought the whole time," she said, heading over to Karen. She was standing in the doorway of the kitchen, frowning at me. "Hi, Ms. Karen."

That made her smile as my sister wrapped her arms around the woman's legs. "Hi, Thisbe. You had fun though, didn't you?"

"Yep! I saw Hollis and Daddy and Ms. Vicky. She told me that I can come back whenever I want to." She giggled slightly, letting the woman go. "Are you cooking?"

"Yes."

"Can I help?" Not waiting to listen, she headed in there, calling out a greeting to Eli's sister Linda, who was probably also in there.

I just went to take a seat next to Steven. It was only nine in the morning and I knew I'd be stuck over there for the whole day. Steven elbowed me gently, but didn't look at me.

"Your boyfriend is going to be enough of a problem today. I swear to God if you and my mother fight, I'll kill you," he whispered under his breath.

I usually wouldn't respond to Steven when he got like this. Usually we got along pretty well, but when he was upset, he was upset with everyone. And since his estranged wife was coming to town, I could sympathize. However, I'd had about enough of everyone being on my back about things all the time. It was one thing coming from my parents, but it was a complete other coming from some guy that I didn't even really like and thought was a horrible father.

"You're an asshole," I said under my breath, only loud enough for him to hear. With that, I stood, heading into the kitchen. I did this out of reflex, not realizing at the time that I would be heading right into the room that Karen was in. Complete oversight on my part.

"Auden's a bad cook," Thisbe told Linda as I came into the room. She was at the table, watching the woman peel potatoes.

"Thisbe," Karen warned, over by the stove, mixing something. "Behave."

My younger sister just glared at me, only brightening as Eli came into the room, Erica in his arms.

"Eli," Linda scolded. "She's too old to be carried."

"You're just jealous," he told her, going to sit his niece down in a chair next to Thisbe. "Where's your husband?"

"Kevin's back at the hotel. He'll com down later. He didn't want to be here while we were cooking."

"Me neither," Eli said, kissing my neck as he passed me, headed over to the fridge. "Hey, Mom."

"Hi. How was dinner last night?"

Eli glanced back at me. "It was interesting."

"Mmm." She shook her head when she saw what he pulled out of the fridge. "No beer."

"Mom-"

"It's too early for that. Put it back. You can drink a soda."

"You can't tell me what to do."

"Do I need to call your father in here?"

Eli slammed the fridge closed before stomping off back into the living room. I rolled my eyes, going to take my place at the table. Linda smiled at me, greeting me before prompting her daughter to do the same.

"Hi, Auden," Erica said shyly, not looking at me. I smiled over at her slightly.

"Hi. How old are you now, Erica? Five?"

"Yes. I'mma about to be six."

"Oh."

"I wish Vinny was here," Thisbe whined, laying her head down on the table. "I miss him."

"Who wants a stinky boy here?" Linda smiled at her. "Huh?"

"Vinny's not stinky. Unless he farts." She giggled then as did Erica. "Where's Jake?"

"In his room, I think," Karen told her, still staying over at the stove. "Sleeping, probably."

"Can I go wake him up?"

"Yeah. I wanna play with Uncle Jake," Erica agreed.

"Maybe later, huh?" Karen smiled over at them. "Grandpa's watching the parade in the living room. Why don't you go play with him?"

"But we wanna help," my sister reasoned.

"Yeah, but Joey gets lonely all alone."

"Mmmm…Okay." Erica jumped down, my half-sister following. Then there were three.

"How's school been going, Auden?" Linda asked me after it was clear her mother and I weren't going to speak. "It's your last year, right?"

"Yeah, it is."

"So you're not going back for more?"

I shook my head slightly. "Eli's really getting tired of the long distance thing. I figure it'll just be better to move down here."

Karen made a noise at that, but said nothing. I rolled my eyes, not speaking to her either.

"Do you have any idea what you'll do down here?" Linda asked, genuinely interested. "Job wise?"

"Not really, no."

"It's hard to find a job down here," Karen butted in finally, like she wanted.

"Well, I'll find something," I said, still not looking at her.

"Will you though?"

"What do you want me to say, Karen?"

"I don't want you to say anything, Auden. I just think that the two of you should consider more options than just moving to Colby."

"You're the one that got mad when I said I didn't want to be in Colby."

"I'm not going to argue with you, Auden."

"Oh and I am you?"

Linda sighed. "Sorry I brought it up."

Karen let out a huff, but I didn't want to hear her start up again. Eli would just get mad at me. Heading out of the kitchen, I went into the living room. Erica was sitting in her grandpa's lap while Thisbe was on the couch, in between Steven and Eli.

"Hey," I whispered to Eli as I lifted my sister up before taking her place and setting her in my lap. "You okay?"

He nodded as I laid my head on his shoulder. 'Yeah. You?"

"Fine."

Steven was looking at me, but I ignored him. He was a jerk. I wanted nothing to do with him at all. Really, the only Stock I wanted anything to do with was Eli and that was just because he hadn't gotten drunk yet. They could all go to Hell for all I cared.

* * *

"I haven't seen you in a long time, Auden."

"Yeah, I know," I said, smiling at Vinny. "Did you miss me?"

"Uh-huh." He sat down on the back porch step next to me. "I went and saw my mommy and my other grandma and my mommy's boyfriend and my brother and my sister and my uncle and my-"

"You saw a lot of people, huh?"

"Yep," he said, nodding his head. "I did."

It was a few hours later and Steven's kids had finally shown up. Kelly refused to come to dinner though, instead staying at the hotel. Which was fine, I guess. It's not like I was banking on her coming so that I could use Karen's hate for her to my advantage and get her off my back…or whatever.

"Alright, guys, now that everyone's here, we can play," Jake called out from the center of the yard, holding a football. "I'm team captain. Who's the other one?"

"I'm captain," Vinny yelled, suddenly animated as he jumped up. "Me!"

"You?" Joseph came out of the house, smiling. "You wanna be captain, Vinny? You know that means you gotta pick your team, huh?"

"Dad, he can't be captain," Jake said, frowning. "Steven, come be captain."

"I-"

"No, Dad!" Vinny was in the center of the yard now, next to his uncle. "No. I'm captain!"

"Just let him be the dang captain," Eli complained, coming out back as well, Thisbe and Erica with him. Kevin, who had finally shown up, stood up from the patio chair he was sitting in, stretching.

"Where's Taylor?" I asked as Jordan came out back to play. "Does she not-"

"She doesn't like getting sweaty," Jordan told me as he came down the porch steps. "Aren't you gonna play, Auden?"

"No. I'm-"

"I choose Steven," Jake yelled out suddenly, cutting me off. Vinny glared at his uncle.

"I choose Auden."

"No," I repeated, now to Jordan's brother. "I'm not playing."

"Auden, you have to play," Eli said.

"N-"

"It's uneven," he told me. "Now get up and go stand next to Vinny. He chose you."

"I don't know how to play."

"You say that every year."

"I mean it every year."

"Auden, come on," Vinny said, bouncing up and down. "I choose you."

Thisbe sent me daggers as I went to go stand next to her friend. I ignored her though, not really up for playing anyways. I was pretty sure I could fake a sprained ankle pretty quickly.

When the teams were all divided up, it turned out that I was, as always, stuck with the children. Vinny had chosen Jordan, Thisbe, and Erica also. The guys tried to tell him that he should pick one of the guys to be on his team, but he refused. I think he was afraid if he did, then that guy would be the one everyone would consider the leader. No way was Vinny allowing that.

"Eli!"

Not that my boyfriend minded. Every time we started, no matter who had the ball or what he was supposed to be doing, he always took it upon himself to guard me. We were playing touch, but at least three times, he had tackled me. Full on tackled me. It was a repeat show as he did it once again.

"That freaking hurt, Eli," I complained this time as he pushed himself up, smiling at me. "Jake, isn't it, like, a rule that you can't tackle someone that doesn't have the ball?"

No one else paid us any mind though, more intent on their pretend football game. The only one that was taking it serious out of the older guys was Jake because, you know, he's stupid. Joseph and the others were really just letting the little kids pass the ball, randomly lifting the children up in the air and pretending to use them as the ball instead.

"Steven," Karen called at some point, coming onto the back porch. "Can you come here for a second? I need that big mixing bowl down from on top of the cupboard."

"Play for me then, Mom," he said, putting my sister down. She had had the ball which of course meant he had to pick her up and run towards the opposite end zone for a touchdown. For some reason though, I don't think that's how they play it in the NFL…or anywhere else for that matter.

"N-"

"Come on, Karebear," Joseph said, smiling at her as Vinny jumped at him, trying to take his grandpa down. He only succeeded in causing the man to stumble slightly. "You can be on my team."

"I don't want to play, Joey. I'm cooking. I can't get dirty."

I was still on the ground at this point, Eli having once again tackled me. I was with her. I'd much rather be cooking than continually tackled. I swear if I get a bruise I'll kill him.

"Don't make me go over there and pick you up, Karen," he threatened. "I'll carry you all the way over here."

"Come off it, Joseph. You couldn't lift me anymore."

"You wanna bet?"

"Y- Joey, knock it off."

Bounding up the porch stairs, Joseph headed right over to his wife. "Last chance."

"You'll put your back out," she warned as he moved to gather her in his arms.

"Told you," Joseph said simply, easily lifting the slight woman into the air. Kissing her while he was holding her up, he laughed slightly.

"Ew, Grandpa," Vinny complained. "That's nasty. Come back and play."

Joseph sat Karen down gently before leaning his forehead against hers, smiling brightly at her.

"You sure you don't want to play?"

"Yes. I have to finish making dinner."

"Okay," he said, pressing another kiss against her lips though it was rather quickly. "Karen."

She just moved away from him before heading back inside. Vinny made a barfing noise before going over to my sister and snatching the football from her hands.

"My turn," he said before running towards the two lawn chairs we had set up to symbolize our touchdown area. Kevin smiled, rushing to go stop the boy. I was still on the ground, Eli standing over me now.

Reaching down with one hand, he said, "Here."

I just stared at it wearily. "If I take your hand, you'll just tackle me again."

"Maybe," he agreed before wiggling his fingers. "But maybe not. You never known unless you try."

I reached out to take his hand. "I guess you're right."

"Of course I am," Eli said, smiling as he pulled me up. The second I was standing though, he drug me right back down to the ground. "But sometimes I'm also wrong."

"I hate you."

"Yeah, I know."

* * *

"You what?"

"Joey-"

"No, Karen, that's-"

"Her parents are long dead, her husband left her, and her kids have all moved on. Who did you think she would spend Thanksgiving with?"

"Not us."

"Joe-"

"No."

"Well, it's too late now."

"Karen-"

"Janice is coming to dinner. Deal with it."

"Why didn't you tell me before?"

"Coming from the man that invited his whole family to this house over the summer without even mentioning it?" She snorted, continuing to frost the cake. I was next to her, making Kool-Aid, as was asked of me. She and I had yet to speak other than for her to ask me to make drinks, but I was counting that as a good thing. So long as we weren't fighting, right?

"That's different, Karen. They're family."

"And Janice isn't?" She glanced back at him. "Your almost wife?"

"I asked her out once in-"

"Oh, give it up, Joey." She smiled at him. "Besides, I think that things turned out pretty good, don't you?"

"Depends."

"On?"

"Is she really coming to Thanksgiving?"

"Yes."

He groaned before heading out of the kitchen, leaving Karen and I alone. Linda had gone on to take over playing with the kids while the guys were all watching football. The longer this day went on the more I wished I had stayed at my parents. I knew though if I was at their house, I'd have the exact opposite desire.

"I don't know why he's so shocked," Karen said, more to herself than me I think. "He knows that Janice and I are friends. She used to have Thanksgiving with her family, you know? But her parents died a few years ago and then her children want nothing to do with her. What did he expect me to do? Tell her no, she can't come? Honestly."

When I didn't say anything back to her, Karen just groaned, moving away from the stove now to face me.

"What did I do to you, Auden?"

"…What?"

"Honestly, what did I do to you? Tell you that you can't disrespect God in my house? Is that it? I'm not going to apologize for that, so if it's what you're waiting for, get over it." My shocked silence let her continue. "If I did something else though, something that upset you that wasn't related to that, then I'm sorry. I am. I didn't mean for you to get so upset with me."

Well, crap. Now that she's being the bigger person, I had to at least accept.

"I…I'm sorry too," I let out, watching her now. "I shouldn't have… This is your house. I'm just a guest. I shouldn't say things like that."

"You're not just a guest, Auden," she corrected. "You belong here just as much as anyone else."

I wasn't sure what to say, ever the awkward one. "Thank you."

She just smiled then. "Now, I know you'll hate this but…"

I let her pull me into her arms, knowing that a hug was the only way that Karen could consider a hatch buried. She didn't hold on for long, but it was long enough for Eli to come into the kitchen and see.

"Great, you've made up," he said, heading to the fridge. "Now for a celebratory beer."

"Don't you get drunk, Eli," Karen said, letting me go. "We're expecting company."

"Dad's favorite wife. I've heard."

"Stop calling her that," Joseph yelled from the living room. "I swear, Karen, you-"

"Oh, Joey, it's a joke," she called back to him. "Calm down."

"Then you need to stop referring to her as-"

"It was a high school crush, Joseph. It's not that big of a deal."

"If I were teasing you about-"

"About who? Name one person? See? Now be quiet."

Eli sighed as he popped the tab on his beer before grabbing another. When I raised an eyebrow, he said simply, "For Dad. He's gonna need it."

"Don't you get drunk today, Eli." Karen turned back to the stove. "I mean it. This is a holiday. Not baby Eli day."

Grumbling under his breath, he headed out of the kitchen, once again in a bad mood. I just sighed, going to put the Kool-Aid in the fridge. Karen just went back to what she was doing before, humming under her breath now. I guess our making up and the ribbing of her husband had put her more in the holiday spirit.

"Auden, your phone's ringing," I heard Eli call from the living room a few minutes later. "You want me to answer it?"

"No, I've got it," I said, heading in there. It wasn't like Karen was going to let me cook anything anyways. My phone was sitting on the coffee table, but I went ahead and took the call out on the front porch.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Auden."

I smiled slightly. 'Hey, Heidi. Having fun on your trip?"

"Mmmhmm."

"I can't believe that you're going on vacation on Thanskgiving."

"Thisbe'll hardly notice. Besides, I need some me time. "

"What exactly are the two of you doing anyways? And who is this guy?"

"His name's Jonathan. We're just staying at his vacation home in Vermont. It's nice to get away some times, Auden."

I second that. "Does he know about…?"

"About…?"

"You know."

"I know what?"

"The baby."

She choked on nothing. "I didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"I just assumed Karen would. Then again, I suppose the two of you are fighting, so she wouldn't." She sighed. "I wasn't pregnant, thank God."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Oh that's…are we happy?"

"Most definitely, Auden. I couldn't have done another baby. Thisbe killed me, just about. And without a guy there…though I suppose Robert wasn't there much either."

"It makes things easier, too, considering you don't know who the father would have been."

There was an evident pause in the conversation.

"Was that a dig, Auden? Because-"

"No," I said, frowning. God, what is with everyone thinking I'm constantly bashing them? "I was just saying-"

"I have to go. Jonathan's saying something," she told me abruptly. "Have Thisbe call me tonight, huh? Before bed? Is she staying with you or the Stocks?"

"I don't know yet. She might go stay with Vinny at the hotel with his mother."

"Well, whatever she does, make sure she calls me." With that, she hung up. Whatever. I'd already fixed things with Karen; I wasn't going to start worrying about something else.

"Who was that?" Eli asked as I came to sit next to him on the couch. Jake was on my other side and decided suddenly that meant he could scoot closer to me. Yeah. Ew.

"Heidi," I told him, leaning into his arm. "Where are the kids?"

"I dunno. With my sister doing something, I guess."

"Today's been a long day."

"It's not over yet, babe."

"Yeah," I sighed. "I know."

He smiled down at me before holding out his beer. I just shook my head before closing my eyes. I hadn't slept well last night. We got into Colby late and had only a few hours to sleep before coming over here. I was beyond tired.

"Your brother's rubbing against me," I whispered in Eli's ear, moving even closer to him. "Tell him to stop."

"Jake, knock it off," Eli said, looking over me at his brother.

"What?"

"You know what. Scoot over or go sit somewhere else."

"Dad-"

"Be quiet," Joseph said, frowning over at us. "You're all adults."

Eli just took another swig of beer, glaring over at his brother now. I fell asleep against him though, not even caring what Jake was doing on my other side. I was too tired to care anything about the other guy.

I don't know how long I was asleep for, but I was awoken some time later by the arrival of our last guest.

"Oh, Janice, I'm so glad you could make it," Karen's voice interrupted my dreaming.

I was no longer leaning against my boyfriend, but rather curled up on the whole couch, a blanket thrown over me. Peeking my eyes open, I found the living room mostly empty, save Karen greeting her guest at the door and Joseph who was still sitting in his chair.

"Sorry, I'm so late," the woman said, working her way into the house. Joseph still wouldn't look at her though, focusing on the television. "I was baking a pie."

"You didn't have to do that," Karen said, taking the aforementioned pie from the woman.

I just stared, taking in the woman's looks. She was about the same age of Karen and Joseph of course, a year older I think if I know my Janice stories the way I think I do. She was also significantly taller than Karen and much younger looking. Er, well, not so much younger looking. More she had obvious work done. Not a lot, but enough to be noticeable. She was also blonde where as Karen had brown hair. Not that I'm comparing the two or anything or whatever…

"I had to bring something," she said, glancing around the room. "Where is everyone?"

"Out in the backyard. The younger kids wanted to play out there and the others went to go supervise." Karen frowned over at her husband. "Joseph, we have a guest."

I didn't have to look at him to know she got a glare right back. Then, grumbling slightly, Joseph stood up.

"Hello, Janice," he said tightly while I just cuddled under my blanket, hoping to stay off their radar for as long as possible. Karen either didn't notice me or just didn't care to introduce me as she then led her friend further into the house to the kitchen. Still grumbling, Joseph once again took his seat.

"I see you over there," Joseph told me when it was just the two of us once again. "Auden."

I still didn't sit up. "Why didn't anyone wake me?"

"Eli said you hadn't been sleeping well."

"He always says that."

"Maybe he's right."

"Maybe."

Mr. Stock sighed loudly, throwing a glance over his shoulder towards the kitchen. "I am not going to be able to relax with her here."

That makes one of us. Yawning, I forced myself to keep my eyes open. "Is it almost time to eat?"

"Soon, I hope," he said, shaking his head. "The others are out in the backyard if you want to go out there."

"No, I'm good."

He smiled slightly at that. "I'm glad you came to spend Thanksgiving with us, Auden."

"Yeah," I sighed. "I am too."

"And I just want you to know that you're welcome in our house even when Karen's being-"

"We made up," I told him, knowing that he was only throwing his wife under the bus because he was angry about the Janice thing. "Today. So everything's okay."

"Oh. Well that's good."

"Yeah."

I started to lull off again after that, breathing softer and softer, hardly even hearing the television anymore. It was Karen's voice once again that woke me, this time finally calling out that it was time to eat.

"Come on, Auden," Joseph said. "March me into my doom."

I was less than thrilled about having to get up and go in there. The last place I wanted to be with in that kitchen with them while they held hands and said grace. Still, I knew that if I didn't get in there first, I wouldn't get to choose whose hands I held and I was not about to get stuck between Vinny and Jake again. No way, not me.

"Hey, Aud." Eli wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me close as he pressed a kiss to my head. "Sleep well?"

I just smiled as the others came into the house, filling the little kitchen to the brim. "Yeah, I did."

"Good." He had a beer in his other hand, which he sat on the counter to interlace fingers with Thisbe. "You wanna hold my hand, Thisbe?"

"Yes," she giggled, reaching up to do so. "Eli."

I just stood there during the prayer, lucking out to get Eli on one side and Steven on the other. My luck continued as, after getting my plate, I was actually able to sit at the adult table with the others. The kids were sitting in the kitchen per usual, while everyone else was in the dinning room. Normally I got roped into babysitting them in there, but this time Steven made Taylor eat in there, leaving me to the dinning room.

"I haven't even been able to tell you yet, Karen, about Vancouver," Janice said not soon after we had sat down. I was squished between Eli and Jake, but I wasn't complaining. I was finally at the adult table! It only took years…

"Mmmm. You just got back what? Wednesday?"

"Mmmhmm. It was fabulous. Have you ever been?"

Joseph snorted, but kept his head down at he picked at his food. Eli was on probably his twelfth beer now and was starting to sway in his chair, one hand on my thigh under the table for support.

"No. Joey and I don't go out of the country," Karen told her.

"You've never been out of the country? Ever?"

"Considering you've known each other your whole lives, I find it hard to believe you didn't know this," Joseph grumbled, still looking down at his food. He didn't catch his wife's warning glance, but I'm sure he knew it was coming anyways. "Not to mention you ask her something like this every time you bring up whatever vacation you've gone on."

"I'm sorry, Joseph, was someone talking to you?"

"Karen-"

"Continue, Janice," she said, turning right back from the venom to the sweetness. Snakes could learn a thing or two from that woman. "As you were saying."

Linda made a face at Kevin who held down a laugh. Steven was lost in his own world, stuck in a heated texting battle with his wife. Me and my boyfriend, however, hadn't spoken since grace and it didn't look like we were going anywhere that night. Jake seemed to be having fun though all on his own, blowing bubbles with the straw in his cup. It's the little things, you know?

"Auden," Eli whispered to me not very far into the dinner. Well, he drunk whispered which really wasn't a whisper at all, but at least he was trying. "I don't feel too good."

"You've only drank beer," I told him.

"That's not true," Jake said, looking up from his bubbles. "We got into the whiskey earlier. I don't drink that stuff no more, but Eli-"

"I gotta lie down," Eli told me, leaning more heavily into me now. He was still sober enough to tell me what he needed, but I wasn't sure how long that would last. "Aud."

I didn't have to make an excuse for leaving, as no one seemed to notice when we stood. Jake just went back to his bubbles, not saying anything else about it. I led Eli through the house, back to Jake's bedroom, where I swiftly deposited him.

"Oh, Auden."

"I know," I sighed, covering him over. "Just sleep it off in here, huh? After it's all over, I'll come get you and we can go home."

"Mmmm…Stay with me."

"I can't, Eli. You know that." I leaned down, pressing a gently kiss to his forehead. "Call for me if you need me, huh?"

When I got back to the dinning room, I found that Taylor had taken my seat. Which was fine, as I could have easily sat in Eli's, but I decided I had better check into the kitchen. The kids had been left alone after all and there was no telling what they were doing. In which I mean, there was no telling what Vinny was doing.

"Auden!"

"Hey, guys," I said, going in there. Taylor's seat, which had been an extra one, was squeezed in between Thisbe and Vinny. Great.

"Are you going to eat with us?" Vinny asked. "'cause we don't like Taylor."

"You want me to?"

"No," Thisbe said, shooting me a look. I think she was still mad about not being picked first. "Go in there. You're a grownup. You gotta eat at the grownup table."

"Be quiet, Thisbe," Vinny said, frowning at her before smiling at me. "You can eat here, next to me."

As much as I complain about it, I guess I do rather like being with the kids, at least more so than the adults. I got stuck babysitting all of them a lot and at times I did find it annoying, but if I was going to be completely honest, I would be offended if they didn't ask me to watch them. After all, for the most part the kids like me. A lot. It only made sense that I would be the one to eat with them. Right?

"Here's where you darted off to."

I looked up as Karen came into the room, going over to the fridge to get something. "Taylor left them in here. I figured someone better-"

"Auden likes us better than you," Vinny told her as his brother rolled his eyes. Erica, not used to her cousin's outburst, giggled. She never spent enough time around Vinny to learn to be annoyed. "So go away."

"Vinny," Karen warned, frowning over at him.

He just looked down at his plate, mumbling that he was sorry. Reaching over, Thisbe grabbed the roll off my plate.

"Thisbe."

"I want this," she told me simply before eating it.

Apparently I don't have the same power as Karen. But really, who's surprised?

* * *

"I get that I'm bad at cooking so they don't want my help there, I do, but do they really think I'm that bad at washing dishes?"

"Do you want to be washing the dishes?"

"Well, no."

"Then shut your mouth."

Steven and I were both outside, him smoking a cigarette while I sat in a patio chair, slightly offended that Karen and Linda had waved me off from helping them clean up. I thought maybe it was because they considered me a guest until I saw Janice got to stay and help them. All the guys dispersed after dinner while the women cleaned up the kitchen. So why was I left out of that?

Of course, if I was with my mother, she would tell me that that was good of me, not to fall into such gender specific roles. And sure, I would applaud myself if it had been my choice not to help. However, it was not. I asked to help and was relieved. Totally different.

"What is your problem, Steven?"

"Excuse me?" He had been facing the yard, blowing his smoke that way, but now he was looking at me.

"You heard me," I said, swallowing. "What have I ever done to you?"

"I never said you did anything to me."

"Oh, come off it. All you ever are is rude to me. Considering I'm the one that has to baby-sit your kid half the time, you think you'd be a little nicer."

"I don't know who you think you're talking to-"

"I'm talking to you."

His eyes were dark as he stared at me. "You are _not_ my mother, Auden. I hardly know you, really. We're not friends and we don't have to be. It's not like you and Eli are going anywhere anyways."

"What are you-"

"When you get out of college, yeah, sure, you'll slum it with my brother for a few weeks, maybe months, but we both know that you're not staying. You're just playing with him." He dropped his cigarette, smashing it with the heel of his shoe. "You're stringing him along and for what? So you can feel better about yourself? You're going to fuck him up again, you know that? It's best if you just cut him out now and save us all the trouble."

It was pure adrenaline that was fueling me now. Usually, I'd back down from the argument around this time, instead heading into the house. This time though, I wasn't going to. Standing, I let my anger handle the words, giving my brain a break for once.

"You're picking apart my life?" I laughed at him humorlessly. "God, Steven, you're the one that left your kids. You get that? You left your kids behind so you could what? Come stay with Mommy and Daddy? That's cute. Maybe you should focus on your pathetic life before you worry about mine and Eli's."

He came towards me now. "What did you just say?"

"I'm pretty sure you heard me."

"Look, you little-"

"You guys need to knock it off. Now." The backdoor opened and Joseph stepped out there. "I mean it. Both of you. Your mother came to get me. God, they can hear you all the way from inside."

But that was the thing. Karen wasn't my mother. This wasn't my family. I don't know why I get so caught up in all the drama that surrounds my time with them when, ultimately, Steven is right. Well, slightly. I wasn't going to leave Eli when I graduated. Of course not. But me and him wouldn't be staying here. He had had hang-ups about leaving Colby before, but I know one thing for certain; I'm not going to be Karen. I'm not going to be Heidi. I am not going to be sucked into the small town life. If Eli wants to stay here for the rest of his life, that's fine, but he'll be doing it alone.

Cursing and slightly drunk, Steven just headed off the porch and out of the backyard. Joseph just shook his head after him before looking to me.

It was rather easy, making plans in your head and all, but when you're faced with your decisions, it's much rougher. Joseph had always been nice to me, so my anger that was already waning was useless on him. I had never been mad at him. Ever. I couldn't imagine someone actually being able to. He was just so…nice.

"I don't know what that was about, but just not today, alright?" Joseph was looking at me, not smiling for once. "The kids are watching Charlie Brown. You can come watch it with them. That's what they want. Or what Vinny wants. He asked me to ask you."

I just watched him for a moment before taking my seat again. "I think I'll stay out here."

"In the cold?"

"It's not that cold."

"Alright," he gave him, turning to head into the house. "Do what you'd like."

I stayed out there for awhile, alone. I knew that the kids would be put to bed soon and I'd probably need to help with that, but I didn't move from the chair instead watching the night. Joseph was right, it was cold. It's the east coast though, so I really can't complain.

"Still out here?"

I glanced up as Linda stepped out onto the porch. "Yeah. Are you guys done with the dishes?"

"Yep," she said, smiling at me as she came to take a seat at the patio table. "God, it's freezing out here. I can't wait to get home."

They lived out of state. I could never remember where exactly and didn't want to come off as uncaring by asking.

"Yeah, I just want to get back and finish the semester.'

"Mmmm. It'll be nice, huh? To finally be done with school in June?"

"Yeah, it really will."

Linda and I had never really had a conversation. She wasn't like the boys; she was very independent. She hardly came back to Colby, only on holidays really. And even then, only ones that weren't spent with her husband's family. I liked her though. Or what I knew of her. She's more like her father than any of the guys, always kind and smiling. I just wish I had a chance to get to know her better.

"You really pissed my brother off," she said after a moment of silence. "He's angry that you told him off."

"Oh."

"Yeah." She laughed slightly. "It's okay though. His self-righteousness is rather annoying."

"He's always acting like I shouldn't be here. I'm dating Eli. If he doesn't like it, then he can get over it." I sat up some. "It's like his wife kicks him out so he takes it out on everyone else."

Linda hesitated before saying, "He's always been like that. Mom's turned all the boys into babies and kept them that way. It's like how Jake refuses to move out, Eli gets drunk constantly, and Steven throws a fit when he doesn't get his way. She doesn't want to admit it, but she secretly loves having something to do all day, taking care of them."

"It's sounds rather sick when you put it that way."

She just smiled at me again. "You'll get it one day, Auden. You always want to keep your children close to you."

For once, the mention of me having a child didn't make me feel hollow inside. And I didn't feel the need to explain to her how I never wanted another baby. Maybe it was that I didn't know her that well. Or maybe I just liked her a little bit more.

"Are you ever going to have another kid? Other than Erica?"

She looked at me then and smiled slightly. "I didn't want to say anything since last year you were pregnant. I thought I'd wait to tell everyone at Christmas."

My eyes got big. "Really? You are?"

She nodded slightly. "Not that far along, but yes."

"You should go tell them," I said, staring at her. "They're your family."

"Yeah, I know. I just figured-"

"It wouldn't bother me." And it didn't. "I'm happy for you."

"Kevin hopes it's a boy."

I rolled my eyes. "My mother _hates_ when guys say that."

"I've never met your mother," she told me. "Mom though says that she-"

"Yeah, I know."

Laughing slightly, Linda looked out at the night. "I guess everyone can't like everyone. I'm sure they're polar opposites, our moms."

"Not really," I said, shaking my head. "My mother just comes on strong is all. Karen's always been nice to her though."

We stayed out there for awhile, talking. It was Linda that convinced me to go back inside, as she wanted to put Erica down for the night. The little girl was spending the night with her cousins at their grandparents house. Of course Thisbe just had to stay too. Of course.

"Guys, are you sure you all want to share the bed?" I asked as I took them into Eli's old bedroom. "Huh?"

The kids were already in their pajamas, save my sister. Her bag was in the truck and I still needed to go get it for her.

"Yes," Vinny said, clambering up there. "We all love each other, Auden."

I don't know what had gotten into Vinny, but after watching TV, he had been really loving. He let Jordan have the last juice box, he allowed Erica to share his piece of pie. It was really unnerving.

"Do you love Vinny, Erica?" I asked as she got up there too on the opposite end. "Huh?"

She just giggled. "I love Jordan and Thisbe."

Vinny wasn't phased. "Do you like my jammies, Auden?"

"Of course," I said as Kevin came in to tell his daughter goodnight. "I love Cars."

"Me too," he said before looking at my sister. "Where's yours, Thisbe?"

"We're going to get them," I told him, leading my sister back out of the room. It wasn't until we were out at the truck though that I spoke to her.

"Are you sure you don't wanna come home with me, Thisbe?"

"No," she said, all huffy again. "I don't want to go anywhere with you."

"Thisbe, I did not ask Vinny to pick me to be on his stupid team, alright?"

"He's my friend. Not yours."

"Trust me," I told her, opening the backseat door. "I know."

"You're not even good at football."

"I know."

"Then how come he picked you?"

"I don't know, Isby. Alright?" I gave her the overnight bag. "Can you change into your clothes on your own?"

"I'm not a baby," she said, offended.

Groaning, I led her back into the house. "Well, get to it and then go get in bed, huh? I'll be there in a second."

As my little half-sister ran off towards the bathroom, I went into the kitchen to get something to drink. Eli was still in Jake's room and I didn't plan on moving him that night. Since it would just be me alone at the apartment, I figured it'd be okay to have a beer or two. I mean, everyone else freaking had one.

"I don't think you kids realize how expensive beer is. Especially when you all binge drink it this way."

I froze. "I'm sorry, I-"

"Oh, Auden? Is that you?" Karen came out of the dinning room, frowning. "I just heard you pop the tab and thought it was one of the boys. I'm sorry."

I just shook my head, stepping away from the fridge. "I just thought it-"

"Its fine, sweetheart," she said, coming to get a drink herself though she was of course drinking water. I'd seen Karen drink once and that was wine. Beers were beneath her, I'm pretty sure. "Are the kids in bed?"

"Kevin was in there with them, putting them down."

"I doubt it will last," she sighed. "All of them in one room. Vinny will probably end up in bed with Joseph and I tonight. Either that or Jordan will go sleep with his father."

"I'm just going to leave Eli in Jake's bed," I told her. "I checked on him a few minutes ago and he was still sleeping. Is that okay? I don't know where Jake will-"

"Jake can sleep on the couch," Karen said before glancing at me. "Unless you-"

"I'm going back to Eli's tonight."

Nodding, she said, "Well, that's fine too."

"Did your friend leave?"

"Yes, she-"

"Thank God."

Karen made a face as her husband came into the kitchen to get his own beer and get more pie.

"Joseph-"

"I was kind, wasn't I, Karen?" He gave her a kiss on the cheek as he passed. "Besides, you knew that I wouldn't like this."

"I knew that you would still act like a little boy."

"She's rude to me constantly, Karen."

The woman took a deep breath, holding it for a moment before heading out of the kitchen. Joseph just snorted before glancing at me.

"Good Thanksgiving, Auden?"

I'd had worse. Like the year both my mother and father forgot that it was Thanksgiving and didn't even mention it. Then when I did, they told me how childish it was for me to still think about things like that. All at the ripe age of 9. Yeah. So there's that year.

"It's was okay," I said, taking another sip of my beer, not sure what else to do. "Wasn't the worse, wasn't the best."

"There's always next year," he said, taking a swig from his own beer.

"Yeah," I sighed more depressed by the thought than invigorated. "There's always next year."


End file.
